going to have a 'good' week

[Sax]

Hope to be around a bit this week but on the onwards and upwards line not the low and sad one. Decided to take a positive attitude starting now and hope not to disappoint myself. i should be here if anyone needs an ear! Have a good week everyone......

It worries me that I'm close to my limit! Thank you btw for your post Mhamai! I feel how much of this can I realistically take! - its not nice to feel worthless - like don't deserve to be here - but I don't know how to not, and I know wine is a depressant but its also got great numbing properties!!!!!!!!!!!!!

from my personal experience i would put the kids to bed and find a quiet space where you can sit comfortably with the phone and ring the samaritans. i cant get across how much just talking has help me. it was so hard but worthwhile. they dont judge. they dont ask questions they just listen.

have you seen your doctor? maybe you should write him another letter, or see the health visitor.

believe me i know how hard it is. just take a deep breath and pick up the phone....

That would mean discussing things out loud - I don't do that but thank you for the advice. Not sure now but don't worry, I'll just sit and surf and pretend I'm not here!

Hi again Sax, your more than welcome and the offer still stands if you want to talk, now or any tme [[[[hugs]]]]

I now feel pathetic - wish I was totally anonomous - I'm soooo confused, want to feel like me again.

I've made a big mistake coming on here - should never have let my guard down, now I've let myself down too - big mistake and feel very ashamed .

Sax

honey, dont be ashamed, you are not pathetic in the least.

i understand why you feel bad about posting, ive regretted some stuff ive posted of late.

i dont think you need to but if you want to you can get your posted deleted by emailing mumsnet.

dont worry

xxx

Ok - I hope Gossifer lets me know how she is doing and about her situation soon - but with regards to everything else I hope no one else posts on here because I shouldn't have kept this thread going! Please let me know how things are Goss but I am not in the right frame to discuss issues becasue I'm crap like that so please let this thread go - thank you and see you all around guys!

dear sax, i'm so sorry i've be off in no communication land all weekend - had such a day trying to get everything ready on friday i didn't even get a chance to come and say goodbye

it sounds like you had a really great day on friday - not heard you talk like that before - well done honey
if you don't want to post anymore i understand but i really hope you do, just talking waffle does us all good on some level and i'll miss you
will let you know what the doc says tomorrow!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx big hugs
my ds is wailing and wailing - go to go, will be back

Ahhhhhh Goss its good to hear from you - thank you for letting me know you are still around - its comforting to know. I will post if you can be bothered to read but please let me know what the doc says tomorrow becasue I'D really like to hear! I was just a bit down on everything earlier, wine is kicking in so feel a little lighter now!!!!

Sax - I'm here too!! It's just that my home PC is crap and keeps dying for no apparent reason!!!

NB: New Computer = Number 458 on the things I need to buy for the house!

Sorry you're still feeling bad. I am going to make you open up if it kills me!!

wasn't what I said earlier enough - wine set in now so feel something - not likely to be so on edge now thank god! cheers for getting back in touch guys

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm make me open up eh queen flounce, that should be interesting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

hello you, glad you're feeling a bit better, was v.interested in your post on fri night when you'd had a good outing with the lads, it's great to hear if the ADs are working in some way! its amazing how kiddies pick up on our feelings isn't it? i'm just learning that and my ds is only 16 weeks; i went out last week and my partner looked after ds, he was knackered and really not coping, ds wailed all night until i got home, ds totally sensed how my dp was feeling as he worried more and more; sounds like all your dss' could sense you were feleing good and enjoyed themselves - great!
how you doing honey?

better thank you but probably wine related - but yes Friday was obviously good due to me feeling good - they are so perceptive especially my 4yr old dx with asd cos he's especially aware of peoples perceptions of situations.

BTW Huggy - the HV is never an option - bitch told me my 3 yr old (now 4 and a half) was an annoying, irritating little boy - he has just been diagnosed as asd so fuck her eh!!!!! Not someone I will be ringing in a crisis! I hope I never see her again! Bitch!

New day and new week so we start all over again - wish me luck!

Is Queenflounce still queenflounce or something new again??? Also, do you still have a job? - go careful won't you becasue if you read this in the day means you are on here again and not working

Morning! Still me, don't have time to change it.... faaaaar too busy you understand.

How are you feeling this morning? My PC died last night as I paid my visa bill. Bl00dy Virgin credit card won't let me pay over the phone so I hope the payment went through!

I got your email thanks.

Any time you want to chat.... I'm usually ALWAYS here. I do think that once you let go and realise that you need to look at your problems BEFORE dealing with everyone elses then you will probably see big changes. I repeat.... YOU ARE NOT SUPERWOMAN!

I am feeling more positive today, therefore it would be counter productive to go into things wouldn't it? surely its best just to move on and 'forget' all the shit! i'm not really sure anymore.

And - as for being superwoman - thats the aim isn't it, I KNOW its not really an achievable goal but a goal all the same!

morning all, a big hug & for the week

Cool - have a good week Gossifer! Good to see you .

Sax - problems are like tumours..... deal with them and they get smaller.... pretend it's all ok and they grow. Sorry for the cheesy analogy, but its true. I found on the days I felt better that was when I could really look back on the bad days and put them into perspective. Trying to understand WHY today is a good day, but yesterday wasn't..... that way I'd feel more in control for tomorrow.

Trying to talk about things on a really bad day is when it can get too much. If that makes sense.

Yes that all sounds extremely logical queenflounce - problem is I don't know how to talk about things - I'll have a little think and see what I can do!

Sax - Just be honest and say how you are feeling... you've been doing that already! Perhaps having a good day will make a difference. You should see things a bit clearer than through the cloud of depression. Do you think your AD's are making a difference yet?

How's your DH?