Day 8 Off Citalopram And Feel Alive!

[boolifooli]

The last 4 days have been yuk but I feel great today! I first noticed yesterday that I am feeling things more, I cried while watching a movie yesterday and that hasn't happened for a while. Although the Citalopram capped the anxiety it also capped a lot of the good stuff. Anyways I just wanted to give some hope to people who are thinking of coming off and worried after reading many horror stories.

I feel pants today. Really down and extremely tired. I'm taking Orlistat (for being a fatty) from the doctor, and it's making me really, really tired, which in turn is making me extremely short-tempered.
I've booked DS into nursery this afternoon so I can have a sleep. Is that really selfish?

chillo. YOU ARE NOT SELFISH.
you are good and kind person who has amswered a post and helped a stranger in need (me) so thts as far away from selfish as you can get. as for putting your son into nursery so you can get some rest, to me seems a very smart move, as if you are not functioning properly thing can go pear shaped, so you see, youre just a TIRED kind selfless mummy on the go!
hope you have a goos sleep.
and that the "fatty" pills are doing their job, as losing a few pounds can make you feel bit better, ive only just stopped wearing my maternity clothes (and my son is 1 this month) i was 8 stone when i got pregnant and was 15 stone after i gave birth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im only 5 foot so looked like a butter ball, down to 12 stone and only another 4 to go ..EEK. but am doing it pound by pound rather than setting a goal to lose 7 stone!
and on a sunday i allow myself 5 chocolate buttons as a treat so that the chocie fix is at bay.
sleep well and thanks for posting, as it makes the rest of us feel like we are not the only ones who are having a hard time xxx

BOOLIFOOLI- thanks for info on library and knocking google on the head- it seems to be making me worse the more sites i see! hope your son is ok now, you must be going through hell, cant imagine. you must be very brave. our 4 year old son woke up in june and couldnt walk and was screaming in pain every time he tried, turned out he had irratble hip syndreome but made a full recovery thank god, its just the most awful thing not being able to help the poor littlr things, as mums all we want to do is take the pain away and protect them, so huge respect to you for wht you are going through and also for taking the time to write on mumsnet and help others out. THANKYOU XXXX

Hi Chillo - You are def not being selfish. Tethering ds to a lamp post for several hours in the street would be a bit mean but taking him to a place where he will be cared for and entertained is not selfish. Are you likely to feel tired all the time or is it a side effect that will tail off over time? Would going to bed an hour earlier make any difference?

Yoda - he is walking again but has a wide gait and is having physio to hopefully get him more confident jumping and standing on one leg. Now that I can see he is improving albeit slowly I am much better and more logical about the outcome. The fierce motherly protection instinct cuts right to our hearts so it's easy to understand how it's an area that is prone to anxieties isn't it.

Yes, please delete Google from your Favourites list

Wel.... Day 13 off citaliopram and I feel....OK. Which is a big improvement on the previous 12 days. Get bursts of anxiety and irritability but not too bad. Weird head feelings mostly gone. But I have to say that I have felt really really ill until recently. I wouldn't go from 20 to 10 to 0 in that short a time again.

Yoda thanks for sharing that about your weight. It made me feel better as I put on 4 stone when I was pregnant, but it's reassuring to know someone beat that

Booli, I hadn't thought of tying him to a lamp post. Now that's an idea... And you are so right about Google. It can cause real panic.

How old is your son, Booli? I can imagine that something like that would be hard to deal with. Did you blame yourself at all?

I think the tiredness will just come and go. I had a great sleep this afternoon Apart from the strange dreams, but that's a side effect of both sets of tablets. I'm quite used to them now.

Hi Orm. Good to hear that you are ok. Ok is much better than not ok.

Sorry this is long and rambling

I have had a really terrible day and spent a lot of time crying.

I went back to work on tuesday after having swine flu and my boss called me in today and ripped into me about "not following sickness / absence procedures" because I was too ill to get out of bed to post my sick note and had asked my DH to do it but he forgot until friday. I had left a phone message with bosses PA on sunday night saying that i had posted the sick note but he had it today and accused me of deliberatly decieving his PA as the post mark on the envelope was monday. He had a transcript of the phone message that I had left and he pointed out that i had said thay I had posted the sick note last week. Told him I had asked DH to post it but now he wants to meet again next wek with my union rep present so it looks like he wants to take this further. As far as I am concerned it was a simple mistake on DH's part and i was unaware that he had not posted it until friday when I spoke to bosses PA on sunday. He was really really nasty about it and also refused to accept a self cert for the first week of my illness so I have had to go back to the doctors and get a sick note to cover the whole two weeks
In 2007 i did end up having a lot of time off due to PNI so he is really angry that I have been off again.

Pause for breath

Do you think I could get sacked for this? I am panicking as I am the only wage earner as DH is also suffering from depression and has not worked for over 18 months. I really feel he is out to get me. Why do people have to be like this? I feel like he does not beleive me that I have been ill and that i'm taking the piss.

Sorry for long ranting post but i needed to get it off my chest.

Orm I am glad you are feeling better today and Chillio you are NOT being selfish

Oh Banana you poor thing. That is so not what you need when you have been unwell. Firstly, don't panic.
Have you spoke to your union? Speak to them as soon as you can. Ring your union direct, don't just speak to your rep at work. If I were you I would get a union rep from the union (not the work one) to be with you in the meeting.
It sounds to me like your boss is being petty, and a strong union presence should prove this.
If your boss tried to sack you over this he would be in the wrong, as you do have a sicknote to cover the period of absence. Keep pointing that out to him. Apologise for not following the procedures, and keep saying that it was because you were extremely ill and not because you were trying to deceive them.
I would get the union to point out that he should have accepted a self-cert for the first week of illness as well. By pointing that out, you show him to be in the wrong and not following procedures himself.
And if it did come to the worst and you lost your job (and I don't think it'll come to that) then you have a clear case for unfair dismissal.
I hope that helps. I've been in a few wranglings with work over sickness myself in the past.

Thanks Chillio. It is so hard for me to stay calm in these sort of situations. I start to panic and cry and then I don't get my point accross properly.

That's why I think it's important that you have a union rep there. A rep from the actual union will know a lot more about what is right and wrong than your work rep and would be a much stronger presence.

Hi Broken - I'm sorry your boss is behaving unreasonably but do feel the union are there for exactly this sort of thing. You haven't done anything wrong, keep reminding yourself that. (I'm the worst for taking on the guilt of other people's wrongdoings.) Be clear in your mind that you have nothing to be feeling bad about, you should feel miffed about how the boss handled it so poorly thought, sounds like you caught him on a bad day.

Chillo - ds is just over 3. If there was anyway I could have made it my fault i would have, I'm usually very good at that, but this was just one of those freaky things where the body attacks itself. I do feel guilty how I didn't worry about his walking slowing down when it first happened as it had coincided with a mishap at the park and we all thought, even the GP, that he had a sprain that was taking some time to heal.

So i've got 2 more 10mg tablets to go and then thats it! I'm quite excited to be nearly off these little buggers. They have been brilliant for me but i do feel that i'm ready to beeee freeeee

How is everyone else getting on?

Hi Broken. I've lost count of how many weeks I have been off them now and haven't once curled up in the fetal position in a cupboard yet so I have to assume it's been a roaring success so far. I am very grateful to them, I dread to think what would have become of me had I not sought help.

Good luck for your first day, it'll be Monday no? Just plan as much ahead as you can to make allowances for any yucky days you may encounter but know they will pass.

how's things re: boss?

ive an on day 2 of taking 20 mgs of "the litle buggeres"...............hmmm thought having severe postnatal anxiety was bad, but have been throwing up ever since i took them, not to metion an awful case of the squitters and headache.....oh and cant sit still as feel bit jittery!
do these symptoms last?
dont know if its worth taking them?
also read oodles on here about pepole pilling on weight, is this th case???
as was 8 stone getting pregnant and due to being imobole for all my pregnancy (due to heart condition) ended up weighing a whopping 15 stone and thats after i had baby! am 5 foot so the umpa lumpa look isnt good. lost 3 stone so far but cant possibly afford to gain any more weight,

seems the more i read on mumsnet the more side effects people are having to deal with, on top of initial issues.
whats the verdict on these tablets????????
help or hindrance ??????????
ps BANANA- hope all went well with your boss- good luck xx

oops, meant to write "i am on day 2" sorry

Thanks Booli - you have been off since 3rd sept so you are doing fantastic. Bit of a shame that my first day off the meds I will be in work and then 2 days later (on wed) I'm having meeting with tosser boss and lovley union rep.

Today was my day off so not had to deal with boss. I did pop in and see my unnion rep tho and he says boss is using bullying language and doesn't have a leg to stand on as I have now taken in a sick note for the 2 weeks and with postal strikes etc he is just being a tosser about the deliberate deception shit (he accused be of deliberate deception over the phone call to his PA)

Fuck im I say. Feel reassured now I have spoken to my rep. I'm going to enjoy my weekend and relax.

Wow broken I feel proud of you even though I've never met you! I'm still on 40mg (down from 60mg) and I plan cut down to 20mg soon-ish.

Booli, the same for me: I don't think I'd be here now if it wasn't for the tablets.

Yoda, the side effects don't last. I don't think they usually have such an immediate effect - could it be psychological? Stick with them though

I think it's more common to lose weight on Citalopram as they suppress appetites, but it'll take more than drugs to supress my appetite

BrokenBanana, don't worry about your work and the meds. YOu'll still have them in your system for a while. I'm glad you feel reassured. It does sound like he is making a fool of himself.

Hi Yoda - could there be any chance you have an unrelated tummy upset? If things haven't settled down by mid week I would think about asking to try something else.

Hope you all have a relaxing, stress free weekend - we can hope can't we! We all deserve some us time, let's try to find some tranquil amid the chaos.

Has anyone else watched Eastenders tonight? It was really harrowing.

Yes.

Terrifying.

hi booli, hope you are having a restful weekend? although i dont think the word resful and mummy go together. could do with 6 weeks on Richard Bransosns island.
you were right about tummy bug, both my boys now have it, out house smells like rancid vomit. nice!
logging off for the weekend to spend time with my boys.
hope you all enjoy some special time.
love yodayoda xx

How is everyone. Last tablet tonight. I'm nervous about work tomorrow cos of tossser boss but i'm excited about getting off these meds.

Had a pretty good weekend done loads with DD.

Hope you are all ok

Will you all be around tomorrow night in case I wobble? Please please please

brokenbanana.
Good luck sweetie with the "tosser boss"
be strong and know you have nothing to be ashamed of or to be sorry for, shame on him for treating another human being so poorly!
chin up and think happy thoughts.
dont let the pig drag you down.
let us know how yoy get on
we are all rooting for you. xxxxxxxx

Thanks yoda fuck stuff em all I say!

Yoda hope your house is smelling a bit sweeter now

And yep, we are all behind you. Your boss knows he is in the wrong so hold youe head up because you have nothing to be worried about, and he does.

Fuck him indeed!