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Original poster

Day 8 Off Citalopram And Feel Alive!

370 replies

boolifooli · 07/09/2009 12:08

The last 4 days have been yuk but I feel great today! I first noticed yesterday that I am feeling things more, I cried while watching a movie yesterday and that hasn't happened for a while. Although the Citalopram capped the anxiety it also capped a lot of the good stuff. Anyways I just wanted to give some hope to people who are thinking of coming off and worried after reading many horror stories.

OP posts:
Stayingsunnygirl · 02/10/2009 11:26

Owwwww - poor you Chillo!! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you this afternoon.

I can understand why you feel angry about what summer said. I think she was hurting and lashing out, but that doesn't make it easier for you.

BrokenBananaTantrum · 02/10/2009 12:41

Chillio how's the toe ?

OrmIrian · 02/10/2009 12:47

Ow.....ouch chillo

ChilloHippi · 02/10/2009 13:13

It's throbbing a bit. I've put my sock back on and daren't look again. What a wuss! I have a feeling that I shall have to cut the nail as much as I can later. I'll need a couple of glasses of vino before I do that though

My day has picked up though...my prize from a MN competeition has just arrived: a load of Thomas goodies for DS.

How is everyone else's day going?

gonnabehappy · 02/10/2009 13:18

Staying - thank you so much for sharing that story. It has helped.

Chillo - having a bit of a low but will be keeping everything crossed for you this afternoon.

The banana porridge for brains thing is really bad today - am so tempted to do another cold turkey and get off this stuff. I feel as though I have lost who I am if that makes sense.

BrokenBananaTantrum · 02/10/2009 19:56

I've had a good day today as I've managed to get an appointment to have my contraceptive implant removed on tuesday instead of having to wait 3 weeks.

gonnabehappy - stick with it. We are all here for you. Cold turkey is only good on boxing day with some cranberry sauce on a big butty.

OrmIrian · 03/10/2009 17:09

Aw shit I feel so sad today. Keep crying. The weird buzzy brain shudders have mostly gone but my hearing is still odd. And I feel so weak and tired. I am hoping that this is just the last bit and I am still suffering a pharmaceutical 'hangover'.

Roll on tomorrow. Got to drive about 400 miles so am hoping I'll be move lively.

ChilloHippi · 03/10/2009 18:18

Hope you're ok Orm.

BrokenBananaTantrum · 03/10/2009 18:45

Oh no Orm i'm sorry you are feeling shite. Can you plan a nice place to eat lunch tomorrow so you have something to look forward to on your loooongggg journey? Sometimes the small things can really help.

Please be careful tommorrow and please come and let us know how you are.

Take care.

sugardumpling · 03/10/2009 20:14

Orm, hope you are feeling better soon! and Chillo hope your foot is better!, Ive felt a bit crap today, we have to choose DS's secondary school by the 23rd of this month, didn't realise how stressful it would be, feel like my heads gonna explode!

BrokenBananaTantrum · 03/10/2009 20:22

bloody hell that's early to be having to choose. Go with your gut instinct and try and have a look at the ones you think might be good.

Don't forget that the choice you make now does not have to be the final one. If DS starts and he doesn't like it you can change later. Not ideal I know but don't put too much pressure on yourself.

Everyone - try and be KIND to yourselves.

sugardumpling · 03/10/2009 20:48

we've looked at 3, the one we want him to go too is quite hard to get into,its a good school and he's a very bright kid but he wants to go to one where some of his friends are going, Its ok but I think the other school will be better for him so he's kicking up a bit of a fuss.
Don't really know what to do for the best, cos I want him to be happy with where he'll be going.
We have to give in the forms this month but won't know what one he's got into until March so I'll be stressing till then I expect

ChilloHippi · 04/10/2009 06:30

That's a long time to wait isn't it? March seems such a long way away. I do believe that if a child is going to do well then they will do well wherever they go, so don't panic about the choice too much. I can understand him wanting to go where his friends are going. That's very important to him.

Thanks for asking about my foot. It's a lot better, and actually isn't as bad as I first thought I've cut the nail back as much as I can (after several glasses of wine!) and it's a bit tender but I shall live

Orm, I really hope your day goes well today. Sending nice thoughts your way.

We up early to go off to a bootfair so got to dash.

Hope everyone has a good day.

OrmIrian · 04/10/2009 07:53

Thanks for the good wishes everyone

sugar - in the end you have to go for the one that you want. I went through this dilemma with DS#1 and am going through it with dD. They want to be with their mates and I want them to go to a better school. DS#1 is now fine and very happy but I know it's going to be hard for DD. We knew this time that we'd have no time to choose but it was a shock with DS#1. Back to school in yr6 and then - bang - open days and make your mind up time!

Original poster
boolifooli · 04/10/2009 15:16

Hi all. Hope you're all 'still swimming'. 35 days since Citalopram and 14 since wine. Feel okay, very very busy and have the energy to meet the day. Feel slimmer but might be my mind playing tricks on me.

OP posts:
BrokenBananaTantrum · 04/10/2009 17:34

Had a bit of a wobble today. I've been on 10mg for the last week. Went out for lunch today and felt a bit overwhelmed when I got there at first but coped.

How long do you think before this anxiety will go? Is a typical withdrawl symptom or should I go back on my 20mg's ?

Good to hear from you booli

ChilloHippi · 04/10/2009 21:14

That's all good news Boolifooli. Keep going: you're an inspiration

Sugar I hope it helps that Orm has been there and done that. Let us know what you decide with regard to schools.

BrokenBanana, I remember having the anxiety when I started them, but I haven't had them since I cut down. Hopefully someone can advise.

ChilloHippi · 06/10/2009 19:18

How is everyone? The weather has been a bit wintry and that can make people feel down.

BrokenBananaTantrum · 06/10/2009 19:36

still feeling occasionally anxious but not too bad. i don't mind listening to the rain on the window but i do get pissed off when i have to go out for a fag in it when i'm at work

how are you chillio? is the weather getting to you?

ChilloHippi · 06/10/2009 20:09

The weather used to get to me. I now am armed with a SAD lamp. I did spend 10 minutes today sitting on abench in town in the sunshine, making the most of it (even if the bench was a bit damp and I got a wet bottom!).

Is the anxiety getting any better at all? I have realised that I have been grinding my teeth a lot again recently. That's a side effect of Citalopram. Have you had that at all?

BrokenBananaTantrum · 07/10/2009 07:56

Yes I have noticed that i have been grinding my teeth recently and i didn't know it was a side effect so thanks for that. Anxiety is OK, manageable using the techniques i learned in counselling

I think i might invest in a SAD lamp this year. Do you really find it useful?

Glad you got some sunshine where you are. It piddled down all day for me yesterday. Sunshine on the face def. makes having a wet bum worth it. Looks like i'm going to get some sunshine today so feeling happy about that. I find that even little things can really cheer me up now.

Hope everyone can have a good day.

yodayoda · 07/10/2009 10:06

CAN ANYONE HELP PLEASE?
i have just been given 20mg one a day course of these pills for 28 days, havent started taking then as yet, just seem to be staring at the box so far!
i know we are all on these pills for different reasons, but does anyone suffer (like me) from "postnatal anxiety"?
i have an overwhelming fear that my 11 month old and 4 year old are going to die, or that i am going to die and leave my boys crying at night for their mummy.......
all srems back to being pregnant and finding a hole in my heart so couldnt breath all the way through pregnancy, but had a happy and healthy baby thank god. but saw a horrid cardiologist in march, and although my hole isnt life threatning he told me to go home and make a will !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sent me over the edge! and am so terrified my boys will die or follds will come and i wont be able to keep their heads above the water (not sure what floods will come!) but even found myself on the net at 4am trying to buy a boat! m(we live nowhere near water either) and then have been getting quotes th have huge windows fitted inh the loft roof so we wouldnt be trapped if there was a fire or flood.
when im walking along the street i an looking for safe places to push the buggy to incase a lorry mounts the kirb...etc etc etc and so it goes on......
i have searched the web for books relating to postnatal anxiety but all that seems to come up are books about postnatal depression and ref mums who want to harm their children or themselves and issues on ono bonding......
CAN ANYONE HELP with advising on a book more about the fear of not being able to protect your babies and just wanting to keep them from harms way..... my 4 year ols beagn school a few weeks ago and i made sure they had done a fire drill in the first week... i know this isnt normal behaviour but have taken the first step and told my lovely husband how i feel and been to docs, but am now worried about the bloody pills now.
sorry to go on and on, just seem easier to write to mums who are going through the same thing
kindest regards yodayoda

ChilloHippi · 07/10/2009 12:46

My SAD lamp does help, but they are not cheap. I've had mine for several years now, and it's only a small one but it was over £70 new. YOu could try Ebay for one?

YodaYoda, my depression was at first put down to postanatal, but I was the oppposite and wanted nothing to do with my son. Your fears are completely understandable and do sound like anxiety. The tablets may well help, although one of the side effects to start with anxiety. I would definately give them a go as it sounds like you need some help, but do give them a chance as they take a few weeks to have an effect.

When I was at my 'illest' I was anxious about going out and wouldn't go out on my own. Often I would grap hold of my partner and insist we went home because I just couldn't hack it. I didn't have fears like you had that things were going to happen, I just got paranoid about people looking at me. It's all part of the same thing, though, and I hope that the tablets work for you too.

You'll always find a sympathetic and understanding ear here, so feel free to post about your concerns.

ChilloHippi · 08/10/2009 09:37

Anyone around?

Original poster
boolifooli · 08/10/2009 10:26

Hi all

Chillo - i'm here

Yoda - thank you for posting, I know it can take great courage to be honest about our fears. Do you have a library card? If so most libraries now have an online search and reserve facility which is all free. You can search books by keyword so you're bound to find something along the lines of what you're looking for. I hope you consider givin the meds a go, they worked wonders for me. I fell into a constant state of anxious depression after my youngest son had a neurological illness and stopped walking for some time. No matter what anyone said I could only imagine the worst scenarios all the time and Google was not my friend! I now know the names, symptoms and prognosies (sp) of several thousand pediatric diseases. I am better now and off the meds, they helped me get things into perspective and get back to a normal life.

OP posts: