Onwards and Upwards - the cvq/ns support and hot chocolate thread

[Habbibu]

Since we've nearly tipped the last one over the 1000 posts mark, here's the new thread for cvq and for her friends to help this lovely lady to keep on getting better.

It's horrible when about 50 different things pop up from a single thought, means your brain starts whizzing then bumping and finally you just want to scream at the next person who says hi to you. When do you next see your hv? If it is pnd alongside ptsd, they may need to change your meds for something a bit mre effective.

but its just an answerphone oj.how can i talk to someone this late at night.ive ended up calling samaritans in the past but had crap experience so dont do that now

differentid my head is full up at the moment.and its driving me nuts

do you have your music?
What's the calmest piece of music you have? Turn it on and count the beat- 1,2,3,4 or 1,2,3. Concentrate on that beat and nothing else and let yourself drift off on it. I know it sounds weird, but it does help filter out the less important stuff that's filling all the other spaces in your brain.
If you think I'm being at all bossy, tell me to piss off though ok?

Can you write your thoughts down. You say you have done this before. It can sometimes help to get things in order. Also you can put it aside for the night and have another think tomorrow. Or if you want a more private ear I could give you my email address?

Oh and don't forget to breathe deeply as you count.

hey ns, if you need to/want to talk about j's birth then go for it on here - anything to help empty your head, and if you're anything like me, once you've thought of something it'll just stay in there going round and round until you've expressed it somehow.

Different scenario entirely, but when I was at my most stressed and had lots of things buzzing round in my head like wasps, I HAD to physically say them out loud, even on my own, just to get them to SHUT THE FUCK UP. So yes, it was like a kind of exorcism. Writing them down helped too, but I still found I had to say it out loud as I was writing it to get the full benefit from it.

likewise if you want to email me then I can give you my email address, or you can CAT me.

if i could sort out what wasnt important from what is id be on to a winner.my brain seems to think there is fuck all difference at the moment and actually i think its quite enjoying pissing me off
my musics all on here.if i fall asleep it will drop on the floor.grrrr.i need somewhere to just write down these endless streams of crap my brain creates

ha, yes, I always get the feeling that different parts of my bod are deliberately trying to piss me off as well. Like my neck at the mo.

A friend of mine used to have what she called a Depression Book - it was like a diary but she used to write down all her crappest feelings and stuff in it. You could do that - the physicality of writing it might be good for you; or just create a Word document and write it all out there.

Never mind what is important, just write it down as it comes out; sort of "stream of consciousness" type thing. As you are doing it, if you can, visualise the words streaming out of your brain and down your arm into the computer/paper, so that once they are written, they are no longer in your brain. This helps a lot with emptying the brain out.

Thoughts are weird. It's a catch 22 situation- you need sleep to sort out these thoughts, but you can't get any until you've sorted them out.

that'sa good idea, thumbwitch.

i started a thing on here ages ago where i was writing everything down like a diary.but ive not gone back to it in ages.i sometimes feel i expose too much of me then i end up feeling even more vunerable.for example i constantly check google incase im picked up on from being on here

when you have written it down, why don't you print it off and then ask mumsnet towers to delelte it?

ive not thought of asking them to do that.i would need to be sure it would be done quickly though as that just causes me more stress.that happened to me before when i accidently said js name and it took until the middle of the next day for it to go.i was a wreck!

its not a common name so anyone would know him even if they didnt know it was me iukwim.gahhh see.talking crap again

I remember

It's a valid concern, not crap. Maybe we should ask tech if they can put a self destruct button on here so we don't have to keep e=mailing mnhq to drop a post/ thread.

maybe they should use the one sticking out of my head

to be on the safe side, keep it as a Word document, rather than do it on the net.

That way no one can get to it and it is completely private to you - and you can password-protect it (somehow, you might have to ask the Geeks) so that even if anyone gets onto your computer, they still can't read it. This will reduce your vulnerability and allow you to open up more and get more of the poison out.

I also remember the bit about j's name - but rest assured that anyone on here who did see it would keep it sacrosanct and not use it EVER.

especially now hes at nursery.i dont want him exposed.i had enough of the press when it happened.i cant have him dragged in to anything or exposed in anyway.id love nothing more than to be able to put our pictures up on here but i cant even do that

I'm so sorry the press were so intrusive. It probably didn't helped the healing process at all?

they werent allowed to use my name but everything else was there.and the court case was covered aswell
we have managed to keep j out of it and his existance is not known.i have no choice but wouldnt change that either.he needs to live his life without more crap for me explain.

I can completely understand why you need to keep that a secret.

differentid i think im ready to try sleep.i nearly headbutted my laptop