To be hurt about how I was spoken to by a&e nurse

[Tellmewhy77]

She said to me don’t come to hospital. So I replied what else was I meant to do if I needed treatment for a self harm related injury. She replied “do something normal” I know the are under pressure and I’m never abusive and just sit and wait so I don’t really feel she had any right to be so horrible

That's really unacceptable, whatever caused your injury you are deserving of treatment. You also don't deserve to be judged.

Crumb of context for the poor?

Please explain the precise way the conversation went.

What a&e nurse? I've never managed to get one of those on the phone. Was it reception?

gosh thats terrible I am so sorry - does your gp offer you help

I think you need to provide context and give the full explanation of what was said.

The last line in your post seems to suggest that you have been there multiple times. Are you receiving any treatment to find the root of yourself harm and getting strategies to find alternative means to handle what is causing you to self harm.

That is absolutely outrageous. A complete breach of the code of conduct she is bound by as a nurse. If you feel able, please contact PALS and make a complaint. No amount of stress excuses this complete lack of compassion.

Were you in mental health crisis or suicidal? If you weren't and the injury was not severe, it might explain the reaction.

Have you spoken to your GP about your self harming?

So you agree, go and complain before there’s any context?
what exactly was the context of the conversation? Are you in a lot?

If you are my cousin????
I have full sympathy for the A&E nurse in this one.

Explanation is I have a female cousin who regularly attends A&E for various things including minor self harm. She is often abusive and a complete time waster. She likes the attention!
She also called an ambulance recently due to getting shampoo in her eyes.
So yes I bet the A&E staff are fed up of her. Her family certainly are also.

@EvangelineTheNightStar no more context needed. Patient seeking help for self harm. Told to "go do something normal". Entirely unprofessional, hostile, and lacking in empathy. Not acceptable regardless of any type of context. I'm a nurse and I would be appalled if I heard a colleague speak that way

Were you in A&E or was this over the phone? It's hard to tell the full context of the conversation with the little information you've given.

What support are you getting for your mental health?

I'm not sure about the NHS in your area, but in mine they advise calling for a nurse appointment at your local doctors, or seeing a pharmacist before going to A&E, obviously a pharmacist would be no good in your situation, but a nurse at your GP surgery would.

It may also be worth booking in to see a doctor while you're on the phone, you're clearly struggling and need more support than you currently have.

If a person presents at the GP with a headache the GP doesn't get to chastise them and be rude for coming in with something they could have self managed with paracetamol. People are only suggesting this is acceptable because this is a mental health issue. We have something called parity of esteem in the NHS. You don't get to speak to people like shit because their behaviour doesn't make sense to you

What was the injury? I would guess that they were commenting that it wasn't serious enough for A&E. Last time I was there with DS, a nurse was being pretty scathing to a man with a "scratch". I thought he deserved it. Fucking time waster.

What a horrible thing to say!

Some hard responses on this thread that demonstrates that we simply do not have a way to support those with forms of mental illness or trauma.

Firstly, I'm so sorry @Tellmewhy77, please do step away from this thread if you need to.

I think the context is pretty clear. OP went to A&E because she had self harmed and needed a medical professional to check her injury. She needed similar physical care to what I needed when I wasn't paying attention cooking dinner but also mental health support. Instead of being given that care she was told to 'do something normal' when she wanted to self harm.

Great! I bet OP never thought of that before and now she's all fixed.

Very easy to say, don't self harm but if you've loved someone going through it as I have, you'll know it's not simple to and support for people in that situation is non existent.

Yes A&E are under extreme pressure and woefully understaffed. Everyone should vote, engage politically and avoid A&E where possible. For those who do need the service, we must hold it to a high standard.

Report to PALS. Do you have an advocate you could bring with you in future? Are you getting other support?

If you dont have anything constructive to say and just want to be nasty then you can bore off. Reported

Yes I have…since i was discharged from a mental health hospital into unsuitable temporary housing when the recommendations in the report was that I go into supported. This is the first time over over lived alone.

So do a lot of people.

But OP this is completely inappropriate and unprofessional, these are the people who are supposed to be helping and mental health awareness should be growing. Is there any way of reporting this nasty woman?

Then when I was back in a few hours later she was rubbing my shoulder and offering me biscuits I don’t lf it was a way to mock me more or genuine

Do people really think like this? Really? How horrible it must be to have this sort of mindset.

In that case my guess was wrong. You are perfectly reasonable to expect better treatment.