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Depression for years - just want it to stop

86 replies

Depressedandthensome · 20/12/2025 13:24

As we head into another new year, I reflect back on how many Chritmases I’ve thought “this year will be different.” I am so tired of feeling this way. I am late 40s, 2 kids and married. On paper I have a good life, ex teacher now working in education but recently demoted in a team restructure which has really affected my confidence. My role and others on my level were taken away. Both children are autistic and partner works away two nights a week.

Ive had depression since my early 20s. It is genetic and based on trauma as well. I am exhausted with feeling so crap all the time. I feel worthless, the worlds crappiest mum and jus crap. I have no real close, nearby friends. I do have family nearby but they don’t really know the depth of my sadness. I’ve been seeing a therapist for about 18 months and she has recommended that I see a psychiatrist to explore better medication which is more specific for me. I really don’t want to get to Christmas next year feeling exactly the same as i do now. I am so tired. I want my kids to have the mother they deserve. I have no motivation and if it wasn’t for the kids and partner, I would have been long gone.

Not sure why I’m posting but I guess I want a light at the end of this tunnel.

OP posts:
Friendlylocal · 23/12/2025 18:33

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Chinsupmeloves · 23/12/2025 18:39

Have you not taken any medication in all this time? It's there to help, millions rely on it, including me. Definitely your next step, good luck. Xxx

Depressedandthensome · 30/12/2025 11:38

I’ve been taking antidepressants on and off, mostly on, for about twenty years but I don’t think they work well anymore

OP posts:
Depressedandthensome · 03/01/2026 16:04

I have got the name of a psychiatrist now so have made initial enquiries for an appointment.

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Eyesopenwideawake · 03/01/2026 16:18

I've just read through your posts @Depressedandthensome and can't see any reference to what help you are having for the trauma? Apologies if it has already been covered.

Badslipperluck · 03/01/2026 16:26

Hi just wanted to add this as didn't see it mentioned... considering your age have you considered the effects of perimenopause and potentially taking hrt? In addition to the usual symptoms, ND symptoms can increase in severity, and as others have mentioned the decreased oestrogen may be affecting the dosage required for your meds.

Depressedandthensome · 04/01/2026 11:16

I take HRT and have for about a year but I don’t know how effective it is. In terms of the trauma, I have been seeing a therapist for about a year.

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Depressedandthensome · 06/01/2026 14:25

about a ten week wait to see someone privately !!

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GCSEBiostruggles · 06/01/2026 14:30

Medication will help to control but not sort the root cause. Taking your therapist's advice will be the most useful thing to unravel it all. Things often get worse before improving with therapy.

I would also ask if you have had any bloods done recently? I ask as I know several women who have had deficiencies flagged that feel like new people once they address them - Vit D was one that was remarkable in our friendship group; the lady was like a new person! B12 and Iron are also things to look out for that when depleted can cause depression/increase depressive thoughts.

Depressedandthensome · 06/01/2026 14:40

Yeah I think I should probably get my bloods done….just have no energy at all for anything.

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JacknDiane · 06/01/2026 22:30

@Depressedandthensome, can I ask what dose of citalopram you were on? I am wondering as im on it too but its doing nothing for me.

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