Hi all,
I'll try not to make this long just don't know where else to turn. I'm married (2 years in, 6 together) and we have an almost 2 year old DS. He also has another DS who is 13 from previous marriage. I moved across the country not long after we met for him and lost touch with any friends.
I am so utterly lonely and feel like I have so many unmet needs both in our relationship and my life in general. We've tried talking a couple of times, he says he doesn't know what to do or how to help me. I do have MH issues which he was well aware of when we met. I am sahm now and do everything, love my DS to bits but feel like I can't live like this anymore. I actually told my DH I want to die a couple of times (not to be manipulative just in having an outpouring during conversations) and get nothing. He will happily just go off to bed on his own and leave me to deal with DS when he wakes or clean the kitchen etc after such a conversation like tonight.
I actually left tonight after saying this and he just locked the door behind me and went to bed. I have no one to turn to, no family and no friends. I genuinely don't know what to do anymore. I have no support from him and am so lonely and miserable. I tell him all I want is time with him and as a family, he books to go away with his friends and spends every other weekend with his other DS so in the morning he will go pick other DS up and take him out for a day of fun then next weekend he's away with friends and weekend after that it's his other DS again. It's been like this for a while and it's Groundhog Day for me, nothing is changing, we get the scraps of time around other things and no special time. I arm truly heartbroken and feel like everyone would be better off without me