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To ask for a suitable punishment for my children

191 replies

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 19:33

Most nights we take our youngest and our dog for a walk.
Never occurred to me to lock the back door (don't come for me, I know I know)

Just found out that my two children aged 5 and 6 have been opening our side gate and helping themselves to chocolate, money, juice anything pretty much

I'm so pissed off I don't know how to calm down

OP posts:
zurala · 09/08/2023 20:03

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:01

Yes they are fully aware
If they need to pop out for milk or anything I will watch their children
It's not every night as sometimes DP will just walk the dog or ill do it by myself but yes they were aware
The little one got tired so we weren't even out for long, back in 10 minutes

So you're not even giving the dog an actual walk? You are failing as a dog owner and as a parent by the sounds of it. Sort yourself out.

Mellowautumnmists · 09/08/2023 20:03

And I'm not going to leave them with neighbor again, they either come with us or getting the youngest out will just do it 1-1

Huh?

Hufflepods · 09/08/2023 20:04

It's not every night as sometimes DP will just walk the dog or ill do it by myself but yes they were aware

According for your own OP it is “most nights”.

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:04

Hufflepods · 09/08/2023 20:02

Seems incredibly unlikely. I can’t picture a single infant school that would be okay with infant pupils coming in with cash every day for a tuck shop.

If a 5 year old is stealing money from multiple different sources they are learning it from home …

A lot of primary schools have tuck shops. Bagels for 20p, toast for 15p it's very normal.
Usually manned by 12 year Olds, so small pots of cash will be left.
They aren't cooking any of it, just standing by the table

OP posts:
Maireas · 09/08/2023 20:04

I'm also very curious about the thieving from school..... was that sorted out?

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:05

zurala · 09/08/2023 20:03

So you're not even giving the dog an actual walk? You are failing as a dog owner and as a parent by the sounds of it. Sort yourself out.

Oh yeah the hour walk he had this morning
And the hour walk with my partner when he got home from work is really failing the dog

OP posts:
WickedSerious · 09/08/2023 20:05

Did a deep hole just inside your side gate and cover it with artificial grass.

Maireas · 09/08/2023 20:05

Where is this school?

Hufflepods · 09/08/2023 20:05

Usually manned by 12 year Olds

12 year olds aren’t in primary.

GreenWheat · 09/08/2023 20:06

Who thinks like this? That if you leave young children poorly supervised and they do something hardly "wrong" anyway, that they are the ones who should be punished? Do you even feed them adequately?

Jojobees · 09/08/2023 20:06

I have several questions;
Its 4 weeks until school goes back, what 5/6 year old can pre plan that level of stealing?
Why are you calling helping themselves to family food stealing?
Why are you leaving your small children unsupervised?
Do you think you might need some parenting support?

DrSbaitso · 09/08/2023 20:06

I'm glad you're not going to punish the children but I'm a bit concerned that a) you thought this was their failing and punishment-worthy initially and b) you are that angry over a five and six year old snaffling a few treats.

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:06

GoodChat · 09/08/2023 20:02

I would put him up for adoption in a heartbeat but my partner is refusing

This thread is telling us a lot of unpleasant things

Yeah I mean I didn't mean to get such severe depression that leaves me struggling to cope most days.
I didn't expect to get that has separation anxiety and if I even dare think about going to the toilet he will bark like mad

OP posts:
MrsSamR · 09/08/2023 20:06

I'm so confused. If your DP is home why don't they look after the children while you're walking the dog?

Irridescantshimmmer · 09/08/2023 20:07

Stop chocolate and treats for quite a long time and explain to your 5 and 6 year old they will go without for a length of time, you decide how long as a consequence of their actions.

Its best to wait until you are feeling settled and calm before you speak to your kids, mostly so you don't go ballistic and regret it afterwards. Obviously, the choice is yours and I totally understand why you are furious.

You can chose not to buy any treats and if you make sure the kids don't have any they are more likely to remember their mistake and the consequences that followed.

I think the length of time should be long enough to get the message across that they will have to wait a long time before getting chocolate and treats again as a consequence for their miss behaviour. Then they won't be in a rush to make the same mistake again.

You may also stop them from helping themselves to food but set a rule they must always ask permission first.

Hope this helps.

Maireas · 09/08/2023 20:07

MrsSamR · 09/08/2023 20:06

I'm so confused. If your DP is home why don't they look after the children while you're walking the dog?

Yes, that's what I don't understand.

GreenWheat · 09/08/2023 20:07

Hufflepods · 09/08/2023 20:05

Usually manned by 12 year Olds

12 year olds aren’t in primary.

Indeed. Before it was an infant school, now it's a primary school with Year 7 or 8 in it!

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:08

Hufflepods · 09/08/2023 20:05

Usually manned by 12 year Olds

12 year olds aren’t in primary.

Yes they are. Depending on their birthday
Do you really have to nit pick

OP posts:
Hufflepods · 09/08/2023 20:08

Worried about her dog’s separation anxiety but leaves her 5 & 6 year old children home alone “most nights”.

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:08

GreenWheat · 09/08/2023 20:07

Indeed. Before it was an infant school, now it's a primary school with Year 7 or 8 in it!

I never said infant school tbf. Another poster called it that.

OP posts:
Maireas · 09/08/2023 20:08

GreenWheat · 09/08/2023 20:07

Indeed. Before it was an infant school, now it's a primary school with Year 7 or 8 in it!

Selling bagels and toast - so hot food. Unsupervised. To infants. With money lying around.....

DaisyAndDonaldDuck · 09/08/2023 20:09

Stop chocolate and treats for quite a long time

@Irridescantshimmmer This would just make the problem far worse. Food is good and all food is fine in moderation. It should never be used as a reward or punishment or seen as a treat.

DaisyAndDonaldDuck · 09/08/2023 20:09

Workquestion11 · 09/08/2023 20:08

Yes they are. Depending on their birthday
Do you really have to nit pick

No they’re not.

Maireas · 09/08/2023 20:10

You're not in the UK, obviously. 12 year olds are in yr7.
Where do you live?

DrSbaitso · 09/08/2023 20:10

Stop chocolate and treats for quite a long time and explain to your 5 and 6 year old they will go without for a length of time, you decide how long as a consequence of their actions.

Ffs don't do this. Supervise your kids properly and put the treats etc where they can't reach them.