My mum thinks I am depressed

[nutcracker]

My first thought was 'shit someone noticed, thats bad'.

why is it bad?! Are you getting any help?

so if someone has noticed, it means it is there to be noticed.... get thee to the quacks , if you haven;t already

She is probably right. You need to see Doc pronto.

Someone noticed - that's good.

Don't try to squash it down, it will only jump up and bite you on the bum. Go to the doc's. .

I am still not 100% sure she is right though.

I do feel down but can't help thinking that no amount of tablets is going to change anything in my life at all.

I feel weird actually. When I was really down in the 6 week hols, I was constantly crying, couldn't eat etc. Now though I am not crying, eating fine, sleeping fine, I just feel like I just can't be bothered with anything or anyone.

Maybe not tablets then, how about talking therapies, extra support.

Its good someone noticed, shows you're not alone

Can't afford therpaies or anything like that.

Xp is moving on the doorstep on Sat which will hopefully be good in terms of me getting a bit of a break from the kids, but tbh having him so close is making me nervy because I just feel like he will be constantly hanging around.

Where do you live? There are tons of free counselling services (I work for 3 agencies for free) and they will have a waiting list but maybe only a few months or not at all.

Are you still doing your college course Nutty?

tablets won;t change anything, nor will counselling BUT they will both help you to achieve an even keel and cope with things better and react to things better. and generally start to feel more positive, even when things are not that great.

Weren't you due to go back to the gp about this sometime anyway, it can't hurt. Therapy doesn't have to cost you but there would probably be a wait. Treatment may not change your cirucmstances but it might put you in a stronger position to resolve to deal with them iyswim. The cycle of frustration, indecision and inertia may well be a symptom.

No Moondog, I dropped out in Nov.

I live in Sutton Coldfield

I am supposed to go back to the gp yeah but I didn't.

Oh Nutty

You have to end the cycle you are in, girl!

I can't though, it just all seems so beyond me.

Small goals my girl.
Do you want to look back in 5 years time and be in the smae place?
Why did you drop out?

oh dear Nutty. Definitely go to the gp, they can tell you for definite if you are.

I don;t know whay I dropped out. Well I do, I was bored and tbh I don't actually regret dropping out, I still think that was right, I just wish i'd not started it in the first place now, should have done something else entirly, but my confidence is about as low as it has ever been and I literally can't do anything.

I got nervous abouit going round to sign my new housing contraxct the other day and I there was no reason to be.

I definatly don't want to be in same position in 5 years, if i am i will jump off the roof.

What is the point of the GP though?
I mean what can they do?
Pills won't solve Nutty's problems i don't think....

Thats what I think moondog, i can't see what difference they would make. My life will still be the same but i'll be on pills.

well in my limited experince (sister was on anti depressants) they make you feel calmer and more able to get up and achieve things. But the gp might refer you to counselling which might help too.

Any decent Dr will not just prescribe pills- they will refer you for some kind of therapy/support. I would suggest contacting Mind and talking to a volunteer there. Your Dr will be all to quick to 'mask' over your problems with Prozac etc. It sounds to me like you need to offload to someone.

I offload on here all the time

I can't actually pinpoint what is wrong though. My friend asked me today and I didn't know.

Nutty only you can change things, not pills nor therapy in themselves. If that means you need some help to gather the strength and clarity to see beyond your current problems then so be it. If you are worried about whatever treatment the gp suggests (even assuming he/she does agree) ask questions. tbh it seems as if you are more worried about finding ways to move forwards than staying in your current situation, and look for the practical obstacles and negatives. I don't see what you have to lose.