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Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

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Original poster

Suicidal & pregnant

96 replies

playsuit56 · 22/02/2022 20:54

If I turn up at A&E tomorrow and say I'm suicidal can they deliver my baby because I don't want to harm him will they take my son away?

OP posts:

Mayhemmumma · 22/02/2022 20:55

They won't take your baby away they will be able to support you

Original poster

playsuit56 · 22/02/2022 20:55

I've named changed and MNHQ can verify my account. I know this isn't an aibu but my head's all over the place, no one seems to care and I genuinely need help

OP posts:

BobHadBitchTits · 22/02/2022 20:55

I'm imagine you'll be referred to the mental health team and sent to a mother and baby unit.

When are you due?

LightfoldEngines · 22/02/2022 20:56

@BobHadBitchTits in the before times, maybe. Now it’ll likely be a Peri Natal Psych referral and sent home, unfortunately.

CandlesBlanketsandTea · 22/02/2022 20:57

OP if you are feeling that bad go to A&E tonight, do you have anyone who can come with you? Alternatively ring the Samaritans. I've reported this thread so that HQ can reach out behind the scenes.

PurpleDaisies · 22/02/2022 20:58

You don’t need to wait until tomorrow to seek real life help if you think you might hurt yourself. Mental health struggles are really common in pregnancy and there are good sources of real life help out there.

Mayhemmumma · 22/02/2022 20:58

I'm a social worker so can tell you with certainty they won't just take baby away at the hospital. They can put you in touch with people who can help and it's a safe place to be even if there's a long wait, just being around medical staff will help knowing you are safe from harm.

Midlifemusings · 22/02/2022 20:59

They will not deliver your baby because you are suicidal. Since your thoughts are about killing others and yourself - they will treat and support your mental health. Their goal would be to stabilize your mental health so that you can see yourself being alive for your child and so he has a mother.

fortheloveofcheesecake · 22/02/2022 20:59

I have no useful advice but I want to add my voice so you know that people care. Please reach out tonight for some support OP.

Original poster

playsuit56 · 22/02/2022 21:00

I'm due in 9 weeks on April 26th

OP posts:

artificialhells · 22/02/2022 21:02

Op I was also suicidal when pregnant. I promise you it will get better. Please reach out for help. The doctors and nurses are go helped me were amazing.

artificialhells · 22/02/2022 21:03

*who helped me

Mooey89 · 22/02/2022 21:03

Hello my lovely, mental health (crisis team) social worker here.
Firstly, I’m really sorry you are feeling like this. Feeling like there is no way out and no way forward is so scary and so lonely.
What I want to tell you is that even if it really, really doesn’t feel like it, this feeling is transient and it will pass, I absolutely promise. It can’t pass if you aren’t here.

Yes, you can absolutely go to A&E, if you feel unable to keep yourself safe.

You can also call 111, they have mental health support 24 hours per day. They can refer you to the crisis team if you need it. It varies area to area but in my team we see you within 4 hours and contact you within 1 hour.
It might be less stressful than sitting waiting at A&E, but the priority is your safety.

It is so so common for these feelings to increase in pregnancy, but they WILL pass.
You can also text SHOUT to 85258.

NeverChange · 22/02/2022 21:03

I'm very sorry you are feeling this way.

I'm not in the UK but would you consider ringing the Samaritans now on 116 123. I've checked and it's free to call and staffed 24 hours.

They will be able to help you.

winterchills · 22/02/2022 21:04

Definitely go to a&e you desperately need support

ghostyslovesheets · 22/02/2022 21:04

anti natal depression is a real thing and can be brutal - please talk to someone - I've been there and help is available - please talk to someone now - yes go to a+e - it can get better

Original poster

playsuit56 · 22/02/2022 21:05

Thank you for the quick replies. I'm reading all of these whilst crying because I really don't know how I got to this point. I just feel so trapped and I want to scream. I'm already a mum to a 9 month old so can't just leave her to go to the nearest hospital. I know I won't do anything whilst she's with me but I was going to take her to my mum's first thing then go to the hospital. I just want to know if they'll deliver the baby and/or take him off me or just send me home still pregnant. I'm scared of what might happen whilst I'm still pregnant I don't want to hurt the baby in any way

OP posts:

ghostyslovesheets · 22/02/2022 21:05

and no - they wont take your baby away xxxx

MNHQ

LivMumsnet · 22/02/2022 21:05

Hello OP, we are really sorry to hear you are feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources.

You can also go to the Samaritans website or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek real-life help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

Some further support links:

NHS: Where to get urgent help for mental health
NHS: Looking after your mental health
MIND: Coping with mental health problems during coronavirus

CALM: The Campaign Against Living Miserably
NHS: Help for suicidal thoughts

Very best wishes from MNHQ and we're going to move this to Mental Health now.

PonyPatter44 · 22/02/2022 21:08

Your baby won't be taken away. There is help out there, please just reach out and ask for it. Be as truthful as you can when you talk to medical staff, tell them what you are feeling. I am so sorry you are in this dark place, and I hope you can find a way out, for you and your baby.

Original poster

playsuit56 · 22/02/2022 21:11

Will they actually deliver my baby or will they just send me home letting me know that the people who can offer support will be in touch

OP posts:

Stressedout1009 · 22/02/2022 21:11

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way op. Sending hugs. 🌷

VodselForDinner · 22/02/2022 21:15

OP, it sounds like you’re having a really difficult time. I’m sorry.

I can’t tell from your posts if you’re afraid they’ll take the baby away, or if it’s something you’re hoping they’ll do?

Sorry, I know that sounds weird but just know that there are options for the baby if you feel you can’t care for him/her. And there are supports for you that will help you care for the baby, if that’s what you want.

Can you talk to your mum?

OvertheRainbow2U · 22/02/2022 21:17

Can you get to mums tonight, can she look after 9MO? Does she have any idea how you're feeling? You are distressed love - can you manage till tomorrow...it doesn't sound like it. I see your post has been moved to MH. We are here - sending love x

Bobbajobs · 22/02/2022 21:19

Sending you lots of love. Sorry you are feeling this way. I have suffered with my mental health and I echo what the poster above has said, it will pass, even if right now feels it won't. Please seek help and talk things through. You'll get through this.

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