Health Anxiety...

[Chummy21]

Hi all... sorry for the long waffly post. I'm not even sure what I'm looking for. Maybe reassurance, advice, validation - I'm not sure.

I'm 41 and mum to 2 boys. Since October 2019 I've secretly struggled with health anxiety. I can lose hours googling symptoms. Every little twinge and niggle becomes something catastrophic. The irony is is that I never go to the doctors to have these things checked out. They either disappear and I find something else to fixate on or I struggle with them. An example being I heard a popping in my arm back in October 2020 while reaching for a drink 🙄 I've dealt with the pain until it's taking over my life both physically and mentally. I'm now waiting for a scan to see what the problem is. But, it's taken me all this time to address it - I'm so terrified of the outcome!

Anyway... aside from this I blow every symptom out of proportion and I KNOW I'm doing it. I just can't seem to stop. I feel really pathetic especially when I see people actually are unwell.

I had covid back in December and before that I had a none covid cough. I also had cold sores... I now have another non covid cold and another cold sore. Today, I have been googling possible causes, when to worry and autoimmune diseases. I KNOW it's just a cold and I've had cold sores since I was little. I just can't turn these thoughts off.

My anxiety does get worse around my period. This is my first true period after coming off contraceptives. I self referred to the mental health team a couple of weeks ago and I'm now on the CBT waiting list. I was told it can take months. So, I'm just wondering if anyone can relate or does anyone have any suggestions.... (please don't judge, I already feel pathetic)

It's so draining isn't it. From the moment we open our eyes. I have been OK for about a year but can feel myself getting worse lately. What medication are you on? And how long have you been on them for? I may ring my doctors this week and see if I can go back on something for a little while.

I'm 9 days into taking sertraline. I've had a few ups and downs with them as it's early days. I haven't been as anxious, it's just when a thought comes and it's all consuming.

It's so exhausting. I wonder how people do it... just walk around normally without all of these worries and anxieties. I hardly remember the old me these days x

@Chummy21 if it helps, my uterus swells and I can actually feel it when I’m on - it almost feels like a mass (to an anxiety sufferer).

I decided to come off all contraception at the beginning of last month. I think I've forgotten how true periods actually feel.
It does help @Tunnocks34, thank you. Yesterday I was constantly peeing. I was going every 30 mins. I've put it down to water retention relief after coming on but, yesterday I was thinking all sorts of things.

I’ve had health anxiety for years (amongst general and social) - I spent YEARS convinced I was going to die from sudden adult death syndrome and would Google it constantly. I wouldn’t exercise or do something like dance at my friends wedding because of the fear. I had my heart checked so many times - I actually do have a heart murmur which is totally benign but was convinced it was going to be the death of me. Then I had my kids and it kind of went away but I do still worry about aches and pains and jump to conclusions.
Funnily enough my anxiety has ramped up now I’m pregnant again and I’m already worried about dying in childbirth. It’s scary having to live with these thoughts sometimes.

I don't specifically suffer from health anxiety but I do suffer from anxiety. The worry,the ruminating, the what ifs are just awful. The mind is a weird thing sometimes, you can convince yourself of anything despite evidence to the contrary. It wouldn't matter if a million people told you the same thing you still convince yourself and then find 'evidence' to back up your crazy thought. That's the worst of Google - if you look hard enough you will find it. The thing to remember is that health forums will have some people using them who are mentally unwell, it will also have some people who have no idea what they are talking about so always take health advice with a pinch of salt. Best wishes to all who are suffering. I now need to go and take my own advice. Exhausting isn't it?

@Tunnocks34 @Chummy21 just thought I would mention my uterus feels like it is going explode due to hormones sometimes. My stomach can swell by 6 inches. I have it checked it twice with the doctors in the last 10 years and I am guessing it if it was something awful I would be long gone by now. I too noticed it when I came off the pill. I think it's pretty normal for many women.

Oh @Ellie1311 I can imagine how anxious you are again. Hormones definitely don't help. Have you shared your thoughts with your midwife?? Although, I know no matter how much they reassure you you will still feel this anxiety. I hope you're doing OK xx

You're right @Libraryghost Google gives us the world of information and some of it is terrifying. I'm in a couple of fb groups and I've noticed that some of the advice offered is at times dangerous. I'm trying to distract myself by doing odd jobs, walking, colouring as soon as I reach for my phone. The thoughts are still there but I'm not feeding them as often.

I was so bloated and tender. I don't ever remember that before the pill. It's passed now thankfully. And after these episodes of intense anxiety and worry I always feel a bit silly because I know that soon it will be something else to obsess over xx

Hi @Chummy21,

Reading your thread with interest as am also an anxiety sufferer, not specifically health related but a weird combination of generalised anxiety disorder, OCD etc!

In the last year or so I've definitely noticed a correlation with my anxiety being worse in the run up to my period. I started using the 'Flo' app to track my cycle , you can log any symptoms on there like mood or digestive issues like bloating etc. It offers me some reassurance that every month my body is going through a totally normal process. Don't know if this would help you? Ignore if unhelpful!

@rainbowninja thanks for the reply. I think I may have Flo (unused as yet). There is definitely a correlation. I've been writing down my symptoms on each day of my cycle. From ovulation onwards for me is particularly bad.

I will definitely have another look at the app though x

Having a really bad day!
Why do I bloody do it to myself. Have the pain in my rib again. So googled it and one of the things that came up was cancer. Said could be a tumor in one of the other organs close by and radiating the pain towards the rib. Now all I'm thinking is the worst x

Could you possibly turn your health anxiety on it's head by becoming obsessive about healthy eating - googling all the vitamins, mineral and antioxidents etc in every fruit, nut and veg you consume? It might help to get proactive and do everything you can to help your body be as fit and healthy it can be. Might take your mind off the negative stuff perhaps?

Thanks for replying. Yeah I feel I need to do something. Maybe exercise more aswel.
I hate feeling like this.

Glad I found this thread. @Squeekybummum I sometimes get a bit of an ache in the same area and get myself worked up every time but it does always go, I think it might be trapped wind, do you think yours could be that? I have terrible health anxiety and post on a lot of these threads, I started sertraline in January and have just increased my dose. In general I am feeling better but still have bad days, some of the things I obsess over are the usual big things like cancer etc but for some reason it’s more often not serious things but anything that could cause pain, I think this is due to losing my dad recently and the impact seeing him suffer had on me, I don’t want my kids to experience that. I was the same a few years ago after my mum died and haven’t really been the same since. I did what @frostedfruit suggested and started to really watch what I ate, the downside to that is I now have a fear of most foods as I deem anything containing fat as bad, I am really limited in what I will eat 🤦‍♀️ I am having more good days than bad so am hopeful this will continue as I adjust to the sertraline, I am also waiting for counselling but the waiting list is long apparently. Are you on any medication, is it something you would consider? Also, I find these threads a comfort, and reading too as it’s easy to escape into a book for a few hours. Sorry for the long post, I just wanted to say I get it as does anyone else on these threads, health anxiety is awful but I’m hopeful we will all beat it.

cheesybeans19 thank you for taking the time to reply.
Sorry to hear about your Dad. I think my health anxiety started after loosing 2 family members a few years ago. And most recently another family member has had a bad diagnosis of cancer. So obviously that's just heightened everything.
With cancer being my main worry, any little niggle and twinge and I'm googling, obsessing and just turning into a nightmare.
It could possibly be wind but my mind isn't letting me believe it is. I did used to be on citrapram, I'm ringing my doctors this week to go back on them. I'm also looking into lots of foods that is good for gut health and general goodness.

Hi Just come across this thread and wondering how everyone is doing .
I suffer from health anxiety for years and have good and bad spells . 2022 has been bad and not just health anxiety .
Not on medication just now but started cbt yet again on 3rd session
Just looking for someone to chat too if anyone there
Ellie

Anyone still around ? Just interested to see joe you are all doing

Hi @Elliejane,

I’m still lurking 😂 I seem to have about every type of anxiety going and can’t really get to the bottom of it but now training as a functional medicine health coach in the hope that I can apply it to myself and resolve all my worries!

How is the CBT going?

Also suffer. I’ve found people tell you to stop being silly and fobbing you off makes the situation worse. You need to address the matter and really start taking care of yourself. You know really when you need to access a gp service and when you don’t. I would keep a log throughout the month and start to work out what is setting you off. Also a few deep breath exercises, possibly yoga on a night will relax you. You may find on a night it gets worse.

Have a look at this video about health anxiety - it might help;

Hiya, I still have bad days. I'm on 50mg of Sertraline. But, Just lately I've been having terrible headaches. I'm not sure if it's connected to medication or something else. I get alot of jaw tightness which was one of my first side effects and it seemed to wear off. But, it's come back with a vengeance.

It's weird. I have good days where I'm fine. Then all of a sudden I think "I'm dying, surely I must have something" and I'll start poking and prodding myself looking for lumps.

I hope everyone is OK x

I have had really bad weekend with health anxiety over my child . Hit pretty much rock bottom . Like I did not want to be here feeling . I decided yesterday I going back on medication soon as yesterday was terrible really bad .
I can’t stop worrying at all even with doctors reassurance so I need to try something .
cbt is not enough for me as anxiety has too severe a hold . I think I need to pause cbt until I am in a better place . But to be fair I had 4 sessions and I not really been given any tools to do other than write down what my triggers are .
Most of time is just talking about what I feel and what started it off so I would say it’s more talking therapy not cbt at all yet