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Mental health

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Original poster

If you could go to sleep today and never wake up again would you be OK with that?

117 replies

ToJabOrNotToJab · 14/12/2021 09:17

Just that really. Curious to know how many people feel this way. I'm not about to do myself harm, I just feel like I wouldn't be scared or sad.

OP posts:

smileyemoji · 14/12/2021 19:57

I can honestly say yes. My life has been nothing but a shitshow and I have met very few people who ever cared about me, I have been bullied and abused for much of my life and it's affected me pretty badly

Allycott · 14/12/2021 19:59

Yes without a doubt! But it would have to be when my precious pets are gone as no one would look after them like I do.

Notgettingbetter · 14/12/2021 20:06

Often. I'm so sorry for everyone who feels this way ❤️

mrsbobbelcherakalinda · 14/12/2021 20:10

Yes I mostly think I would

Heartoverheadheadoverheart · 14/12/2021 20:17

I can't wait to finally rest in peace. It has been a long time coming. OK so I am only in my early 30s but it feels like I have been living in hell forever. Everyday I wake up sad that I have to keep getting through this torture but happy at the end of the day that it is another day done.

I am still here for now because I can't bare the thought of my children facing this horrible world alone and the thought of being apart from them breaks my heart.

So would I be OK with it, for myself absolutely, for my children no.

XenoBitch · 15/12/2021 00:05

Yes.. but what stops me is the fact my house is full of crap... I need to sort it first.

Mxflamingnoravera · 15/12/2021 00:07

No, but only because of the mess my son would have to deal with that I'm
only just coping with now. I can't wish my mother on him. otherwise it would be a yes.

CiaoForDiNiaoSaur · 15/12/2021 00:09

Yes. I've felt like that for years.

I find the fact that I'll be dead one day very comforting.

BourbonScreams · 15/12/2021 00:33

Yes. I remember even as a little kid scared of monsters/murderers in the dark thinking "well, if something gets me there's nothing i can do about it anyway" to calm me down. I'm apathetic to the idea of dying if I'm not aware of it. I wouldn't want to experience the fear of knowing i was about to die though. I'd be sad for my partner more than myself if i died.

Tunnocksmallow · 15/12/2021 00:39

All the bloody time.
If it wasn’t for the impact it would have on my children, it would’ve happened way before now.
There’s nothing left to live for and nothing left to fight for.

smallight · 15/12/2021 12:55

Your life is not shit. You are depressed. Whatever situation you are in right now, it will certainly change

See I used to say things like this too, in the old me in my old life. Because then I could get through things as I knew things would change.
Something terrible may have happened, but the basic foundation of my life remained solid. I knew I just had to wait for said shit thing to fade.

But that's not my life now. ALL of the foundations that held me up are gone. The fundamentals of my situation just are not going to change.

I am depressed but that's because my life is actually shit.

smallight · 15/12/2021 12:57

I find the fact that I'll be dead one day very comforting

Me too. As long as my kids are grown, I know that I will feel a huge sense of relief when I am on my death bed.

Ricekrispiebun · 15/12/2021 13:00

I definitely feel like this the past few years, it's like my coping mechanisms have all but disappeared and I feel as if it would be welcome sometimes

smallight · 15/12/2021 13:00

and nothing left to fight for

Yes I feel like this.

bookworm14 · 15/12/2021 13:17

At this moment, yes, I would be ok with going to sleep and not waking up, because I cannot see any positive future due to the ongoing covid restrictions. However I wouldn’t ever harm myself as my daughter needs me.

Nat6999 · 15/12/2021 13:24

Yes, it couldn't come quick enough for me.

peachgreen · 15/12/2021 14:26

It's a tricky one.

Since DH died, I don't have a fear of death any more. The comedian Rob Delaney talked about how when he dies, he knows he'll be going to the same place as his son (who passed away), and while he doesn't know where that place is, he's glad that whatever happens, it will bring him closer to his son. And I definitely feel that way about DH - I know that when I die, either way I will no longer feel his absence. And that's comforting.

BUT I'm very aware that I'm all DD has, and while I have no doubt she would be looked after and loved if I died, and I've provided for her financially, I don't think it would be the same. As much as I'm tired of my own life and don't see a great deal of joy in the future for me, I want to be there for her and help her grow up and find her path.

So I wouldn't choose to die. And I would fight it, for DD's sake. But not for my own, really.

PhoebeFriends · 15/12/2021 16:07

I wish there was a delete button I could press or an obliviate spell so I could remove all evidence of my existence.
I’d go this second if it was an easy option. I’d love this to be my last Christmas.
Reading these posts makes me think I need to have a better plan.

Notgettingbetter · 15/12/2021 19:51

It's so sad and disturbing that so many of us feel like this. I have depression but I can't help feeling rather than there being something wrong with me, there's something very wrong with our society/human beings/the universe... If that makes any sense? If I feel like this because I'm depressed then I need to find a way to recover from my depression and then life will feel worthwhile again, right? But a lot of the time I don't think it's "just" depression - that our existence as conscious beings is just... not good. (I'm struggling to express myself - I'll blame that on my depression too.)

SameToo · 15/12/2021 19:55

Yes. Happy or sad I would say yes.

fedup078 · 15/12/2021 21:14

@Notgettingbetter
I've certainly had bouts of real depression but this feeling has been a constant no matter how good my life is going
It's not that I want to kill myself
But dying peacefully in my sleep certainly doesn't fill me with terror and no matter how good things are going I can't shake the feeling that I wish I could just press a button a vanish
I don't think any amount of tablets or therapy will change that

MmeDefrag · 15/12/2021 21:44

@Notgettingbetter.

Do you mean that your depression feels like a rational response to an insane world?

Notgettingbetter · 16/12/2021 11:42

@MmeDefrag

Yes, something along those lines. I mean, in terms of being a biological organism with a survival instinct it's really not very helpful at all, but when I look at the bigger picture, life seems incredibly cruel and utterly pointless. I know depressive realism is a thing. When I'm not depressed I can enjoy the beautiful, wonderful parts of existence but even then I'm not sure it's worth it.

Charismac · 16/12/2021 22:03

Yes, I think about this a lot. Part of me knows that purposefully leaving my children without their mum is selfish but the other part of me thinks they'd be better off without me. Tbh, falling asleep and never waking, never knowing the outcome... I'd take that right now.

TwistedOlivers · 17/12/2021 06:46

I'd love to, it'd be great to just fall asleep and never wake up again.

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