Health Anxiety - Part 4

[polkadotpixie]

I hope no-one minds me starting a follow up thread. I know some people were waiting for me to update so I thought I would but happy to ask MNHQ to delete if one of the long term posters wanted to start it 😊

@cripez Thanks! I'm ready to face it!

Really annoyed at myself! Had a really good day and spent the last 30 minutes fixated on a bloody rib/muscle above my right breast which is more “moveable” than the other side and slightly larger! Went down a dark google path and now feel like crying because I’m that annoyed at ruining a lovely day! 😂

I actually think it’s probably been there years and my scoliosis that causes it, but my brain just doesn’t let me think like that! It aches now because I’ve pushed and poked on it so much!

Totally understand @tmh88. We have a good few hours or even days at a stretch and then something else comes along and sets us off again. I know with me that if I don’t have an actual “symptom” to be worrying about, I’m just living in fear of when the next one turns up.

Why do we always google? For reassurance of course and that almost always backfires. I hope you can sleep and let your mind have a rest and no more prodding promise?

@tmh88 are you right handed? You'll always have muscly bits that are 'different' on each side as you'll have one dominant side. Dependant on how they rest it can be firmer/more moveable/harder/softer etc. I have a bit of muscle I can almost 'pluck' (sounds odd but I feel like you'll all understand that 😂) on the left at the back of my neck but not on the right. I assume that's because I'm right handed so that muscle will be bigger and tighter on the right x

@HildegardeCrowe yes it’s exactly that! I’m feeling normal again this morning, it’s evenings when I struggle really! Haven’t poked since and I’m hoping to carry on! Yes Google is terrible! Dp always says what even makes you think of checking these places I need a Nokia with no internet!!

@AJ297 yes I’m right handed haha! I’m sure it is muscle like you say it’s just my brain goes to well that must be a lump not muscle.. honestly, I make these problems and now my chest aches from how hard I was pushing on it last night! There is something there both sides but the one on the right hand side moves more..😂

Hi everyone, hope you're all okay 😊

I'm sorry for going AWOL, I was actually finding the thread was provoking more anxiety and decided to step away for a while

I've been on Sertraline for almost 4 weeks now and I'm definitely finding it's helping somewhat. I feel lighter overall and like a depressive fog has lifted and I didn't even realise I was depressed, I thought it was purely anxiety

Anxiety-wise I've been hit and miss. I'm feeling better about the ovarian issue but I had a flexi-sigmoidoscopy last Tuesday due to rectal bleeding I've had on and off for years due to piles and they found 3 polyps. They've removed them and sent them for histology and were very reassuring that they're benign (they wrote that on my report) but me being me obviously Googled and some types can turn cancerous over time so obviously I've been worrying

I've not totally spiralled though which is a massive improvement for me so I'm hoping the Sertraline is having an effect

Hi @polkadotpixie yes I know what you mean about the thread 😂 can be a double ended sword can’t it really, but I find the good of it outweighs the bad for me x

Glad to hear you are on meds, I’m going to talk to gp about going on them also.

I really am sure them polyps will be just that and nothing sinister, Google is not the right thing to do for health anxiety is it! I’m just the same.

Have you had any side effects from tablets? x

I am really in a health anxiety fog today. For the past 2 days I have had neck pain/stiff neck as well as my other symptoms. I know that this is a red flag for brain tumour if accompanied by other red flag symptoms. I have so many of these symptoms. What is really worrying me is that if my stiff neck had a simple cause then the Amitryptline I am on should help but it isn’t helping at all. This morning it hurts so bad that I can’t hold my neck up properly so am lying down. Combined with increasing numbness on right side and nausea and dizziness I am considering going to walk in health centre. It’s completely ruined Easter holidays as I am feeling so negative. I just want to feel no aches or pains.

Oh bless you @Iamsodonewith2020 really sorry to hear you are having such a bad time. Emphasising with you on brain tumour fears, been down that road before 😬😬

Sorry to hear it's ruined Easter 😒

@Iamsodonewith2020

Have you looked into coat hanger pain? Sounds like maybe you have this and it all just sounds very familiar (I also have numbness/weakness in my right leg and arm on and off) to me so maybe also see "dysautonomia"

I haven't found the reason for it yet, or the doctors haven't but you know, brain tumour is always on my mind.

@polkadotpixie
I can't wait to go on meds!!!

Also, the polyps can turn into cancer over time by yours were removed so they won't

Hi everyone, hope you all had a good Easter weekend.

@Skyliner001 hope you are still ok side effects wise after your vaccine!

Yes, thanks very much, nothing at all but remaining vigilant 😊🤞🏼

@Skyliner001 great news! 👍🏻 Still haven’t been asked for mine!

Sorry to hear you’re so worried @Iamsodonewith2020. Do let us know how you got on. Great the meds are working @polkadotpixie. I’ve been on Citalopram for a few months now but they don’t seem to be helping. Will probably up my dose. Am covered in bruises of unknown origin ATM and have had knee pain for months so am convinced I have leukaemia or myeloma which is what my dad died of. Had normal full blood count blood 3 and 6 months ago but myeloma needs other investigations so am going to bother GP for the umpteenth time. Going to work for the first time in 3 weeks today so wish me luck. Am drinking far too much as it eases my anxiety in the short term but I know I need to reign it in. Bloody convinced I have blood cancer 🙁 but trying to be strong for family. Have a good day everyone.

And great news about jab @Skyliner001. I think if you were to have any symptoms they’d have shown up by now. I’ve had both jabs (Pfizer) as work for NHS and had nothing.

@HildegardeCrowe your very lucky! I had my second Pfizer on Friday and my god I was so much worse then after my first one. The pain in my arm wasn't so bad but the nausea and tiredness was unbelievable. Had none of that after my first one! However, it only last a day then was back to normal. Feel very lucky to have had both vaccines already when I know some people haven't even had one yet.

My health anxiety has not been to be bad. I have had the odd wobble but overall I am ok. Had an assessment last week and I have to have high intensity CBT but as you can imagine there is a long wait so they have sent me some self health stuff to look at in the meantime. I've also taken up gardening and bought some seeds, pots etc to try and keep my busy.

Week 5 on sertraline and I feel pretty good. I'm still getting the odd wobble so not sure whether to increase to 150 or stay on 100. I don't think the tablets are going to stop the thoughts (I wish).

Hope everyone is doing well. Keep strong and remember you got this! X

Hilde sorry to hear you are struggling too. It’s so hard when you personally know the illness you fear.

@HildegardeCrowe thinking of you today, hope your first day back goes well! Sorry to hear your struggling the fear anxiety gives you is awful

@KAP232 happy to hear you are doing well!

How is everyone else this morning?

Touch wood I’m doing ok! I really need to stop using my phone as much I didn’t Google once yesterday as I kept it away in another room and felt so much better for it!
Short week at least everyone!

Going to try a no google day here too. Last night I had dead/numb arm again after all day with dizziness, ear ringing and weird feeling right leg. Had wine with my Amitryptline just so I could fall asleep earlier and stop my horrible thoughts and symptoms. Hugs to everyone suffering today and high fives to those who are winning the HA battle. Xx

@Iamsodonewith2020 ear ringing and dizziness I get with anxiety! I think it’s really common! Wishing you a good day! Every time you go to google think what do I want to gain from this, it works for me sometimes! Post on here instead haha x do you subconsciously hold yourself tight when stressed? That could be causing your arm pain! I know when I’m badly stressed I get bad arm/neck/shoulder pain and sometimes pins and needles x

@tmh88 I think putting your phone away is definitely good for me too. Too much temptation to google otherwise. I’ve been doing it this morning 😢

Can I ask you ladies, have you ever had sex at the end of a period when it’s really light and woke up the next morning to heavier bleeding again? That’s still just my period isn’t it?

Hope everyone else is having a better morning than me. Haven’t been on here much these last couple of weeks, have a lot going on with family which has been stressful. I’ve definitely missed having you ladies to talk to!

Thought I’d come and say hi 🙋🏼‍♀️

I’ve suffered with severe health anxiety for about 15 years now. I don’t ever talk about it but It’s been really bad lately. I seem to have flare ups where it just goes crazy?

My brother died in a car accident when I was 13 then my mum had ovarian cancer and almost died when I was 17, my HA started after this and never really left me.

At the moment I’m convinced I have breast cancer as I have ongoing shorting pains in my right breast and armpit. I also have self diagnosed neck cancer as I have an overgrown piece of cartilage (Dr said) in my throat which I’m paying a whopping £200 to have checked privately this wknd. I also have given myself uterine cancer as my periods have been v.heavy lately and I was told 2 weeks ago I had low iron levels so convinced it’s that or I have bowel cancer.

At any one time I am convinced I am dying with a variety of colourful things. It’s what I’m good at.

I’m feeling low right now as I have two beautiful girls and this is ruining my time with them. It’s all consuming.

I know once I get the all clear from my neck my body will ensure my breast pain gets worse so that becomes flavour of the month. Then it’ll be something else... it’s never ending.

I have CBT booked but it’s many months away. I’ve been on many meds in the past, none help much.

I feel like my body is weak in general and always has been. I see friends who work out and have muscles in their legs etc and I wish I was like that. I try to be sometimes but my body gives out. I feel fragile from top to toe.

I’m going to read this back and it’s going to annoy me, I have t said it all out loud before properly and I know how rediculous it all must sound. Especially when people are out there dealing with real physical ailments, it’s selfish really isn’t it?

Thanks for letting me post ❤️

@MrsWhites I definitely have! Sometimes my period has seemed to stop and come back like this as well. It's deffo your period, but it can stress me out. Only if I am going through health anxiety flareup though, normally I'd be much more laid-back! Sometimes I look back on what I've been laid back in the past about colour and it's insane how much difference the anxiety makes X