Would any one like to join in an anxiety support thread?

[Heatherandmoss]

I’ve seen lots of posts recently about people having a bad time with their anxiety and I thought an on going thread might be good do people can bob on and offer and receive support, share tips and just generally empathise with some one going through the same thing.

I’ve had anxiety since I was about ten ( I realised after my psychiatrist was able to help me pin point my earliest memory of it)

I think there is a bit of misconception of anxiety as some people think it’s just general worry - but it’s not.

When my anxiety rears her head it’s so physical. I sweat, my face can go numb, pains in my chest. I have a feeling like some one is kicking my front door in and I’m scared for my life and I could just be hoovering. Anxiety jolts me awake when I’m asleep and it rolls down my body like thunder. It makes me catastrophize at 3am and my feet start rubbing against each other ( weird) My anxiety makes me walk in to the kitchen with my kids empty dinner plates and suddenly feel so so over whelmed I struggle for breath and tears leak out in a gasp of raw emotion - all done silently so my kids can’t hear me.

I’ve had to give up drinking alcohol because Jesus the anxiety the next day was shocking and lasted days until I suddenly stepped out the anxiety room.

My anxiety has been bad since November as I’ve got some things going and I’m worried my heart is going to pack in because of the extra ‘thud thud thud’ overtime it’s being doing!

Exercise does help me take the edge of sometimes. I nearly went to the GP the other day as it was rotten but at this moment of time I need to be switched on.

Today has not been to bad. I’m considering it a win.

So I’ve you’d like to join in or have some where to say ‘holy fuck it’s bad today’ hopefully more people will be here and you will know some one knows how bad your feeling.

I also reported as it didn’t seem right

@PaperHalo - my anxiety is like that too - it seems to come and go. I'm up early today as I couldn't sleep. I will distract myself later with a lunchtime walk.

I missed the comment that was deleted. Was it very offensive?

Hope you all have a good day

Not offensive, just marketing for someone's counselling deal - assuming it was real and not a scam (although it was very general so a bit suspicious). If it was real, not a counsellor you'd ever want to see if that's their approach! I felt a bit yucky that we'd all shared our difficult feelings and experiences and it felt exploitative.

Yeah I wouldn’t think highly of a therapist who thought that touting for trade by randomly posting on sensitive threads was a good idea :o

I’m feeling a bit anxious today as I finally emailed someone I haven’t heard from in ages - I know them through their job and they were off sick for ages but I’ve heard they’re back. Struggling not to convince myself they hate me 🙄🙄🙄 I’m sure they’re just snowed under - the email I sent was about a non urgent issue anyway. But alas anxious brains are not logical are they!

Still I do think generally my new combo of meds is helping. I have felt calmer since starting the escitalopram, maybe it’s placebo as it’s such a tiny dose but I’m not complaining. I’m making good progress with stuff like productivity so I don’t want to rock the boat by increasing either medication for a while.

I’ve been thinking about assertiveness too. I’ve spoken to my therapist about this, how I’m not assertive with my own kids really. They aren’t badly behaved and considering we are a house full of autism/adhd etc there’s really very little conflict but it’s stuff like getting them to do housework and get off their phones! And with the 3yo I should be a lot stricter. So that’s something to work on as I think it’s related to anxiety I feel about my kids not liking me etc.

Aaaaand just as I posted she emailed back yay! 😁

That's great sing. Assertiveness sounds like a good plan. Asking for what we need, as long as we're respectful should be a bad thing, but I find it so hard.
I'm feeling really anxious today, not really sure why - most likely it's underlying work anxiety but there's nothing at the moment that's actually a problem. I just have that awful 'what have I forgotten' feeling.

Met a friend yesterday and nearly cancelled because my anxiety was so bad, exaggerated by PMDD. I was up at 6, cried, had a panic attack but I forced myself to go and had such a nice time. My brother, husband and father are all badly depressed, tbh I probably am too, and I am finding myself feeling more anxious in the home. Especially around my father.

How is everyone?

Well done for still going annabella that’s great. Sorry things are so stressful at home. It’s really hard balancing everyone’s moods isn’t it.

I’ve requested my next lot of Escitalopram and ask if they’ll put it on repeat as it seems to be helping with the anxiety. I think that plus the Elvanse is a decent combination for me. Possibly I could do with increasing one or both of them, but I don’t really want to rock the boat right now especially when actual life is changing so drastically!

I’m still focusing on being more assertive with the DCs and it’s going pretty well. Just little things like giving them a few more chores and responsibilities, making sure toys get put away etc.

Hopefully popping into town again - I managed to on Friday for a bit although I was knackered really quickly which is a bit depressing.

That's great Sing. Glad you're managing to be more assertive. It's good that your meds are working for you.

Did you manage to pop into town? It's awful when you get tired easily.

It's been a busy weekend. It's felt like there's too much to do. It's hard to switch off when I'm constantly thinking of the next thing that needs doing.

Well done sing. I have a whiteboard with a daily chore for each of my kids to do, so we can all refer to it and I don't have to try to remember it all.
I had another review call with my GP today, and I said I'm still feeling quite anxious, and sometimes jittery, and it's hard to say if that's anxiety or side effect of the citalopram. He said it can take up to 6 weeks for all the side effects to settle down and to get the full benefits. That's a long time!

How's everyone doing this week?

Been rather up and down. Had a good few days apart from being unmotivated which was frustrating! Managed to see some of my friends today and it was great to see them, though at the same time I’m somewhat mourning the lost friendship from last week so not feeling too good about that. To be honest I’m somewhat angry, why did it have to happen! Though on the plus side I know that I can’t “blame” myself per say for this but it still hurts. Even though I knew the friendship probably wouldn’t last as I was the one putting the effort in I’m still somewhat upset about it. Planning to listen to a lot of sad music and then some of my “motivating songs” and hopefully head to sleep.

How are you WL?
Aw tea it sucks about the friendship, a lot of emotions are understandable so I am glad you know not to blame yourself ❤️

I have mostly been ok - managed the second trip to town on my own, and then yesterday spent a few hours with a friend which was really lovely.

I’ve had a bit of underlying anxiety about my to do list though! I’ve not felt so productive with admin this week, probably because I’m focusing more on doing activities with my 3yo. Which is lovely and totally worth it but tiring!

I am a bit anxious tonight though - 3yo was really grouchy and then threw up around 10pm. DH is staying with her and I’m just really hoping it’s not a bug that will go through the rest of us. I’m not as scared of being sick as I used to be - I’d say it’s downgraded from a phobia to just being anxious now, as I’m not in full blown panic like I would’ve been a few years ago. Although if I do start feeling like I will actually be sick then it’ll be different. 😫

Anyway on the plus side I had some nice quality time with my eldest tonight, trying a Lino printing kit!

tea it is hard when friendships end, particularly if you feel you've been 'wronged'. I had one a few years ago, we'd been super close, but I felt I'd been more supportive to her than she was to me over some similar personal issues. Then she found other friends - not an issue at all, but she started lying to me about spending time with them, I ended up feeling like I was forcing her spend time with me, so I let it go. I did feel very hurt for a long time, and felt that she treated me badly.

sing I hope your little one is over her sick and it's not a bug. My dd has awful emetophobia - it's one of the things keeping her from school, so I sympathise.

I'm doing ok. Generally feeling calmer, not sure if that's because things have got less intense or the citalopram. Im still waking up early and feeling anxious. I should get up and do some yoga but somehow I can't and up laying there for an hour or so until I really have to get up.
I felt a real panic about something at work yesterday - not my fault, and I'm trying hard to fix it, but I really noticed how extreme my reaction was. It's these things that remind me that just because I generally feel calmer, I still don't really have a handle on it.
Got my first therapy session next week.

Tea - that sounds really hard. Hope listening to music is helping you 💐

Sing - well done on your trip to town. Glad you enjoyed your time with your friend.

I feel your pain about to do lists. Mine seem never ending this week.

Hope your DD is feeling better.

WLmum - hope you manage to fix the problem at work. I know what you mean about feeling calmer but still not okay. I think for me, I feel so stressed for such a long time that I start to shove things to the back of my mind. Therefore I feel calmer but it doesn't take much to trigger me because all the problems are still there.

I'm feeling low and just kinda flat at the moment. I haven't been sleeping well this week. Work is hectic and things are constantly changing. I've got another meeting with HR next week. I think I've just had enough of it all.

I'm still eating well and exercising but it's no longer making me feel better.

Hi all. I've decided to keep a sort of anxiety log so I can track when my anxiety occurs. I am finding at the moment I am at my most anxious in the mornings. Then a walk at lunchtime helps and I feel better in the afternoons.

I don't think medication is the answer for me.

@Lokikitty everything seems worse when you feel down. Hope your next meeting goes OK. Have you considered looking for other jobs? I used to work in a toxic environment and moving to a new organisation did me the world of good.

Thanks Easter. I have considered a new job but my confidence has been badly affected. I find job hunting very stressful. I'm waiting to see which class I'll be in next year. If I'm not working in a different class, then it's time to start job hunting.

Sorry to hear that loki. It's so awful how bad experiences at work can impact everything else. I once had a job that I hated so much, I cried in the car every morning and lunchtime. The boss and my colleague were buddies, and had been with the person I replaced, and clearly didn't like me. The job I left for, was brilliant, and I loved it for 7 years until redundancy got me.
tea that's a really good idea. Medication isn't for everyone. For me, when my anxiety has been bad and I've been overwhelmed, I lose all sense of what's normal for me, and what I actually want etc. Can't see the wood for the trees. So paying attention to what's going on for you and keeping a record sounds like a great idea.
Stay strong everyone - it's Friday!

Hello everyone. Hope your ok. I have only just discovered this thread. My anxiety levels have been pretty bad this week.

Hi all,
Welcome blue (am guessing we are a similar age? :o) sorry you’ve been struggling.

Easter fab idea on the anxiety log! Spotting patterns is so helpful.

I’ve been doing well with being a bit more productive in the home and I’ve really focused on being a more positive parent with my youngest. I’ve done loads of little activities with her (she’s starting to get into colouring/activity type books and board games) which is really nice, and I’m getting more assertive with all three DCs now in terms of helping out with chores etc.

But. The flip side of focusing on ANYTHING is that everything else seems to go to shit. It is so frustrating. I’ve often used the metaphor of a Rubik’s cube to describe the house - how if you put the effort into one room the rest gets messier again. But I feel like that with my life in general. I’ve lapsed with studying and there are loads of admin tasks I need to do which are building up and giving me a sort of rumbling, permanent level of anxiety because I know there is lots of stuff I need to be doing. I really don’t like this about myself, I just want to be able to cope with everything!

On the plus side DD1 made me laugh last night. She was worrying about DS being late home and she said “I don’t like anxiety! It’s like a buy one get one free offer I didn’t want - it came with the autism” 😂 I like that we can laugh about these things.

Hi everyone. First time poster here. I've found my anxiety is so much worse since I went through the menopause. I fixate on small things and worry away at them all the time. I am constantly reassuring myself in my head, "everything will be fine" etc, and then "but what if". I know I am being silly, I have been through so much in my life and coped well so why do I let my anxiety take over. I don't sleep as well as I used to and when I worry and get stressed my tinnitus gets worse as well. I just have to keep telling myself I will look back in a week or a month's time and the thing that is worrying me now will be just a memory. Hope everyone is doing well.

@mrswhiplington - hi there. I'm in the same situation. I hope the thread will help you.

Thanks eastereggfortea. I've read through a lot of it today and it helps to know I am not alone in feeling the way I do. I don't think I need medication or anything like that but I do try to relax as much as possible. I listen to my favourite music or take the dog for a walk. Sometimes you just need to break the cycle and put things in perspective. I sometimes think I should have learnt how to deal with things by my age, I'm 59, but each day is different I suppose. I am currently sat here eating chocolate and having a cup of tea. These always help.

Hi Blue, sorry to hear that you have been struggling. Hope the thread helps 💐

Sing, I like the rubik's cube metaphor. It's very true.

Hi MrsWhiplington, sorry to hear that you have been struggling with anxiety and tinnitus. Hope the thread helps you. It's definitely good to know that you are not alone.