Would any one like to join in an anxiety support thread?

[Heatherandmoss]

I’ve seen lots of posts recently about people having a bad time with their anxiety and I thought an on going thread might be good do people can bob on and offer and receive support, share tips and just generally empathise with some one going through the same thing.

I’ve had anxiety since I was about ten ( I realised after my psychiatrist was able to help me pin point my earliest memory of it)

I think there is a bit of misconception of anxiety as some people think it’s just general worry - but it’s not.

When my anxiety rears her head it’s so physical. I sweat, my face can go numb, pains in my chest. I have a feeling like some one is kicking my front door in and I’m scared for my life and I could just be hoovering. Anxiety jolts me awake when I’m asleep and it rolls down my body like thunder. It makes me catastrophize at 3am and my feet start rubbing against each other ( weird) My anxiety makes me walk in to the kitchen with my kids empty dinner plates and suddenly feel so so over whelmed I struggle for breath and tears leak out in a gasp of raw emotion - all done silently so my kids can’t hear me.

I’ve had to give up drinking alcohol because Jesus the anxiety the next day was shocking and lasted days until I suddenly stepped out the anxiety room.

My anxiety has been bad since November as I’ve got some things going and I’m worried my heart is going to pack in because of the extra ‘thud thud thud’ overtime it’s being doing!

Exercise does help me take the edge of sometimes. I nearly went to the GP the other day as it was rotten but at this moment of time I need to be switched on.

Today has not been to bad. I’m considering it a win.

So I’ve you’d like to join in or have some where to say ‘holy fuck it’s bad today’ hopefully more people will be here and you will know some one knows how bad your feeling.

WLmum, I like doing things through exercise and detox when I feel up to it. I'm planning on going for long walks during Easter holidays. I've noticed today that my skin feels a lot softer 😊

@WLmum can't remember whether it was you or another poster who said you were mid-forties?

Wondered if you'd considered peri menopause as a potential cause or contributor if you've not had anxiety before? It seems to happen a lot xxx

Hope everyone is going ok

I’ve done some digital decluttering last night and this morning. I’ve not felt like it for months pleased to have done that (mainly emails and photos plus some alarms, files, reminders and notes).

Feel really moody and unmotivated now though and DH and I were snappy at each other. He’s got to go on an errand now and I don’t feel like I can face responsibility at home at all. Feeling guilty for not doing much home ed with DS this term - don’t get me wrong he does enough but I know he’s capable of more and it makes me sad. I find it so hard to split my focus and now I’ve been putting more effort into my own achievements I feel like I’ve let him down. I don’t know how people manage everything. I can’t focus on something without feeling like I mess up everything else and although I’m desperate to achieve something outside the home by getting a job it worries me how on earth the house will end up. The mental load of my life is enormous.

I really just want to hide and watch Netflix or read TBH.

I will try and hold the anxiety though. I have emailed about my next course already (I remembered I tried yesterday but it didn’t send so I rewrote it) and now I can get the smaller tasks of ringing my psychiatrist re prescription, and then returning a phone call to carers support. I CAN do stuff.

I have managed a few bits. Phoned OU (took ages) and a research panel thing we are part of, emailed carers support, and put a wash on. Forgot to eat though 🤦🏽‍♀️

I was getting nervous about the OU form but just decided to look at it (which is what then meant I had to ring as I noticed something wrong). The form doesn’t seem too bad at all. I have to write a bit about how my conditions affect my studying, and then attach evidence of my diagnoses. It’s funny how doing it for this purpose feels absolutely fine, yet for stuff like PIP forms it feels torturous, because you know they’ll be scrutinising it rather than just wanting to know how they can support you.

Sounds like you've got loads done Sing. I sometimes forget to eat when I have a busy day. I know what you mean about struggling to focus on housework when working. It is hard. I often wish that I could afford a cleaner. I just can't keep on top of everything and work full time. Good luck with your OU form.

Thanks loki the afternoon didn’t go nearly as well, I did scan the evidence letters but it involved a lot of scrabbling about and I can’t find the marriage certificate I need at all despite seeing it recently. So I’m a bit stressed now, also worrying about DD1 school stuff and spent ages on hold to the GP for what turned out to be no reason. Gaaaah.

It’s coincided with a “no food seems right” sort of day as well so I’m now feeling rather wibbly and am looking forward to dinner. Might have to retire to bed shortly after! But need a conversation with DD1 as well. Life is too much this evening! 😭

I’ve wondered about cleaners etc but TBH we are too messy for cleaners to be able to clean! 😳

Glad to hear you managed to get some cleaning done sing. I seem to be having that phase too, I’m hungry so know I should eat but everything is so unappetising

Had a rather rough few days. Don’t want to go into too much detail as potentially outing but have been struggling a lot with done things happening and drama once more. I thought that my current schedule was the perfect balance between enough private/down time and social time but i guess not. Though have ‘met’ some new people who have been really supportive so that is good, though am so torn on this whole situation. Just hoping things settle down, it generally makes me so anxious when things like this happen

Sleep is even more fucked, I’ve been walking at 5am as opposed to 6am and struggling to get back to sleep sometimes waking at 4am too, I’m just so exhausted

Hi Tea - sorry you've had a rough few days. It's good that you have met new people that are supportive. Hope your sleep improves soon.

I know what you mean about not being able to go into too much detail. I having been able to properly talk about my work situation.

You can PM me if you want. Or someone else who is on this thread .

Sing - you sound like you had a difficult afternoon. I hate looking for things, especially important documents. It really stresses me out . Hope you had a nice dinner and an early night 💐

I was looking forward to watching Sort my life out, yesterday. It's about a family's struggle to declutter. But it must have got cancelled. When I went to watch it Eastenders was on instead.

sing and tea I struggle to eat when I feel really bad, so sometimes drink ovaltine which at least puts something in my system.
People often say to me about getting a cleaner (I'm always surprised that so many people have them) but it just feels like one more thing to organise and tidy before them come etc which feels too much. I also resent the money - I'd rather spend it paying off extra on the mortgage. I worry a lot about money and about losing my job so I'm always desperate to build some financial breathing space.
I fell asleep on the sofa last night - I was really pleased as I'd felt calm enough to do it and not wired and battling to sleep.

I struggle to eat as well, it’s like I have no ‘drive’ to enjoy anything I eat at all when I feel bad. This week in particular.

I have a day off work today and was supposed to be going for a walk with a friend as I’ve been feeling very isolated and lonely - plus the last two fridays I’ve had off I’ve spent on my own as been cancelled on again. Last Friday I just laid on the couch and didnt move. I’ve seen one friend since last summer. No one has asked me how I am so I don’t think anyone knows how much I’ve struggled since January - despite me doing a weekly Wednesday round of messages to check up on everyone. I’m working from home so it’s been very difficult and I’ve been left on my own most of the week and half the evenings in the house with no thoughts but my own and the cat.

So I’m reading this morning with a new book I’ve bought to distract myself and I might see if I can muster the strength to go to Asda later to buy some wax melts.

What has perked me up is that yesterday I booked for me and the family to have a mini break in a gorgeous lodge about an hour away in Yorkshire for two nights over the Easter half term when it’s legal. Much needed!

@teaandcustardcreamsx

Sleep deprivation seems to make everything more of a battle to get through, I really feel for you! Is there anything you can do to aid it temporarily?

but it just feels like one more thing to organise and tidy before them come etc which feels too much
Oh my gosh yes that’s exactly it. Sometimes things that are meant to help just feel like more work. Delegating isn’t always the answer unfortunately. I feel like there’s a lot of stuff we need to sort out to make life run more smoothly but it’s so difficult to actually set that all up.

The evening was a bit unsettled (lovely dinner though) - basically stuff has blown up a bit with something that happened to DD1 last year and the upshot is we are waiting for a phone call from the police. It’s brought up some stuff from my past too and I am feeling like I’ve not been a good mum. I’ll probably start a separate thread as don’t want to drag this one into it.

I need to try again to find the marriage certificate today or just add a note about my maiden name and send the form in, I don’t want to delay it further when I’ve done so well being productive this week.

That sounds really stressful Sing. Hopefully everything gets sorted out soon. Here if you want to talk 💐

Themadcatparade - sorry to hear that you have been so isolated and lonely. I spend half the week with my cat, so I know how hard that can be. It's awful when you have something to look forward to and then it gets cancelled. Hope your Yorkshire trip goes well.

Thank you loki 💐 no phone call yet, but hopefully won’t be too long - in a way the waiting is probably worse than actually speaking to them, the lady the head of year reported it to was apparently lovely (since the HOY herself is lovely I trust her judgement :o).

I’ve not done much today probably due to being burned out from yesterday as I did so much admin stuff. I asked DH to pick some lunch up on the nursery run so at least I ate (cooking or even raiding the fridge felt like too much). DH, DS and I did have a lovely morning playing a board game though, one we hadn’t tried before but it was really great (not just saying that because I won :o)

I have managed to do a couple of bits though (admin/decluttering) so I’m trying to focus on the positives!

Hope you've had the phone call Sing. Glad you had a lovely morning. What board game did you play? I used to love playing board games. Before the pandemic, me and my DD used to go to a cafe where you could play board games.

Oh I would love to be able to go to a board game cafe! I have been to a meet up of the local board game club which was scary as so many new people but I do like the fact that you don’t need to know someone to play games with them because the game is the focus not making small talk etc.

I am actually obsessed with games I have well over 100. But life gets in the way a lot! It’s nice playing with DH and DS in the mornings now.

It was Periodic, DS (home educated long term) loves chemistry so I got it for him a while ago but we hadn’t got round to trying it.

No phone call but I got a little bit more paperwork into recycling.

Double rainbow this evening!

themad sorry you've been feeling isolated and not cared for. Do they know you feel that way? I often assume people must know how I'm feeling as I'm feeling it so strongly but usually they don't. I sometimes feel that I should have an Oscar!
sing that sounds hard. I hope dd is ok, and you are too. Ime the waiting and build up in my head is always worse than the actual thing.

Afternoon x

I felt a bit rubbish this morning. I'm on day 8 of the detox and I was hoping to have a bit more energy. I've got a phone appointment with occupational health on Tuesday, so feeling nervous about that.

Made myself banana pancakes with blueberries and raspberries to cheer myself up a bit.

Ooh yum!

I had a lazy/static morning but we’ve just spent some time going through the big paperwork box, got rid of a lot and organised the rest - not fully but in categories etc. It actually makes me feel less anxious about sorting some of the issues that they relate to, somehow (eg sorting out the premium bonds my late nan bought me etc)

Well done sing
You're doing so well loki. I need to sort out healthier eating, now that I feel I'm recovering a bit from my intense spell. I'm resting a bit first and trying to get decent sleep/rest back. I did sleep pretty well last night, although I was still awake by 5.30 feeling quite anxious.
I went for a jog too this morning which is starting to get back I track with fitness and exercise which really helps my mh. I tried to do some yoga the other day but was still too tense.

Morning x

Well done Sing. You're very organized.

I've just sorted out all the kitchen cupboards. I've put all the food that I won't be eating on a separate shelf for my daughter. I was surprised at how much of the food was unhealthy. There's things like stock cubes that I use a lot and don't even think about how much rubbish is in them. I use spices and herbs instead now.

I had salmon for my breakfast because it needed using up. And I'm getting a bit bored of granola!

How is everyone doing?

I'd like to join please?
Having had anxiety probably most of my life. Working throughout I'm struggling.
My son had a breakdown in his gcse year and had a set back a few months ago. My daughter is showing signs too now.
I've had a bad week, been in hospital for a brain scan due to loss of memory, no answers as it's clear. But I've no energy, I'm sleeping continuously.
I feel the last few months may have caught up on me and I'm heading for a low. I need to speak to the doctor about work and about why this is happening.
I don't know why I'm posting really just for someone to know how it feels to be heading back to a place I don't want to be