I’ve stopped bothering to get dressed

[Litebritesnow]

I can’t see the point, we can’t go anywhere or do anything and it’s going to be months before we can.
There’s no answer. Lockdown and prevent loads more people catch covid and even if they don’t die they might be left with ongoing health problems but ruin the economy and basically take any joy out of life.
Or let it burn through and more people die or are ill. If we don’t find a vaccine I think eventually the same amount of people will die anyway, just because over a much longer time frame.
There’s no good option.
I have given up. I am hanging on in there for my children but each day is harder than the one before. I don’t have the resilience I did in March. I understand lots of people are in the same situation and many in worse which is why I won’t see my gp.

It is genuine.
I think I was pretty depressed before covid and even people who were in a good place with their mental health before this now seem to be struggling a bit.
I won’t go to the gp. I just don’t think there’s any point. They must be sick to death of people going and moaning to them when they’ve nothing to moan about.

This does sound like depression OP, with the not eating and not feeling bothered to do anything. I think you do need to talk to the GP. In the meantime try to take small steps to improve your lifestyle as healthy eating and exercise really help your mental health. Just get dressed and go for a short walk in the fresh air every day and try to eat 3 small healthyish but tasty meals a day, maybe take some vitamin supplements. Just easy stuff you like but make sure you eat even if you don't feel like it. Same with taking a walk. You might not feel like it but in a few days you will start to feel better.

I am the same. But then, there were days I wouldn't wash and dress even before Corona! If I'm going to spend all day in doors, what's the point of dressing etc? We don't go outside for exercise every day, never have.

@Litebritesnow

It is genuine. I think I was pretty depressed before covid and even people who were in a good place with their mental health before this now seem to be struggling a bit. I won’t go to the gp. I just don’t think there’s any point. They must be sick to death of people going and moaning to them when they’ve nothing to moan about.

You aren't moaning and you do have something to be down about. It's not easy, even for people who were in a good place when it started. Please do speak to your GP, they won't think badly of you. Honestly!

And in the meantime, avoid doomscrolling. The media is full of bad news because giving a story a negative twist generates more clicks. I know me saying this might not change much for you, but there are lots of reasons to be optimistic at the moment. It isn't over, but the headlights of the end are visible up the track.

OP, I’m sorry you’re having such a tough time. Be kind to yourself. Life is hard at the moment.

I have periods when I downward spiral too. I get out of them just by doing the little things and taking pride in them. Even having a shower and putting fresh clothes on (even if they are still PJs! Doing a load of laundry or wiping down the kitchen surfaces. I usually put some upbeat music on while I do if. If I feel I’ve achieved something, however small, it really helps me lift out of it.

However, if you’re really feeling you can’t go on, you really must get in touch with your doctor tomorrow. If not for you, for your children. Please.

Sorry but what you are saying is not normal .
Get dressed and get some fresh air , what's the point you say well because you will feel better getting out in the fresh air and exercise.
Exercise is the most under used anti depressant .
If you feel bad now I am telling you a 30 minute brisk walk will make you feel much better . If it doesn't come back on here and tell me .
Also definitely make a appointment with your gp because yes many are struggling but you shouldn't be feeling like this .
Sitting at home in your pyjamas every day will make you feel much much worse.

Sounds like you need some purpose. Why not volunteer? You dont have to leave home to do that there are schemes set up to link you up to lonely old people and you can put a weekly call into them. Yes i know life is difficult right now (i work for the nhs so see this on a daily basis) but sitting at home stressing about it wont change anything. You need to take some positive steps for the sake of you and your family's mental health

Fresh air can help. Get everyone dressed and go out to the park. Play on the equipment, laugh at your self and run around playing with your DC’s. I bet you will all feel more awake, better appetite and sleep better.

How old are your kids? I'd go out on my own for a short while if they are old enough to be left. How obvious are your pyjamas? Could you get away with just putting on a coat?

I completely get the lack of enthusiasm to be honest.

I work. I get dressed the days I work, obviously.
But the rest of the time, what’s the point.
I just feel like I’ve given up but then I think so what? There are billions of people on the planet what difference does it make if I give up.
That’s also why I won’t bother the gp.

Wow, OP! Imagine if this was one of your children when grown. Giving up on life and modelling really poor resilience to their children - telling them that nothing matters, that it isn't worth it. Family isn't worth the effort. What would you think??
Are you healthy right now? Do you have a family? Company? Enough money to live? Yes.
Stay away from the media. They love a bit of doom and gloom sensationalism. Stay away from MN Coronavirus topic too - hide it. Get the bikes out, get the boardgames out. Get exercise and fresh air. Take your vitamin supplements, look after your well being. Your kids can have a great day today. But it's up to you.

@Litebritesnow I'm sorry to hear about how you're feeling. It definitely sounds like depression to me.

I live in Melbourne and we have just finally emerged from what ended up being about 13 weeks in lockdown. I won't lie, it was bloody tough some days to see the point in anything. But we have to. We have to set an example for our kids and we owe it to them and ourselves to be there for them as long as we can. That means doing things we know are good for us even when they aren't easy or fun, even when they seem pointless and we aren't motivated. All the little things out together can add up to a lot.

So for me during our lockdown, the non negotiables were: every single day, get dressed, brush teeth and hair. Take my children and dog out for a walk/scooter ride for an hour. We all sleep better if we've had fresh air and exercise. Eat 3 meals every day, aim for healthy but don't deprive self of treats. They are such small things to do but once you start down the slippery slope of ignoring your most basic needs, it is hard to claw your way back. If these things are all you achieve in a day then so be it. But it's funny how once we've done them, we often feel more inclined to do other things that help us feel better.

Other things: Don't put pressure on yourself to learn new skills etc. but do make a list of things you want to achieve such as "call brother", "change bedsheets", "read one chapter of book". Just commit to doing one a day. Don't give up without trying something different. Good luck.

I hated the playground before this, and now I hate it even more 😂😂.
My oldest won’t play on it so moans he’s bored and my youngest wants me to constantly be involved and I haven’t the energy or the enthusiasm.
It’s an effort to even get them out the house.

@Litebritesnow aw poor you

This will pass ! I’m personally using the time to read the books i never have time for , spend time in nature and with my kids

It’s just me and my 16 year old and 11 year old e majority of the time so if I don’t make sure I get out for a run or walk I start feeling down

Sorry if this sounds trite .sometimes you just have to go through the motions when you don’t feel like it really x take care

Oh and also - the GP will not be fed up. They are probably stressed and overwhelmed but they're always glad when people speak up about their mental health and seek help. I speak as someone in the mental health field who spends a lot of time with GPs.

Sorry how old are you kids @Litebritesnow

I know this is one long whinge.
I’m not doing Christmas this year either. It requires more energy than I currently possess. I’ve said a couple of presents, that’s it. I’m not having the tree, the lunch etc. It’ll all be left to me and I am too bloody tired and worn down.

Litebritesnow, it matters to your children that you don’t give up. They love and need you. Life is bloody hard at the moment, even for those of us who haven’t got money/health worries but your feeling of hopelessness is an obvious sign of depression.

Your GP won’t think you are moaning. They will understand how hard it is at the moment and that you need some help. Anti-depressants will give you a lift so things don’t seem as hopeless. Then you may feel able to eat better, get fresh air, exercise which will help too.

If not for yourself op, speak to the GP for your children’s sake

Yeah I’m having a very pared-back Xmas

Can you get something nice planned for Dec ? I am working on assumption lockdown IS gonna be lifted

Sorry you are feeling like this op. There is a point to getting dressed though. You do it for you. Mark the start of the day. Have a lie in by all means but then make your bed, have a shower and get dressed. Put your face on or just some nice moisturiser. It will make you feel better, and routine is important. Do it as an example to your kids. Show them that you are taking care of yourself. Show them the importance of routines. You can't control all the craziness of the world right now but you can control what you do. Don't suffer in silence. If you need help ask. Ask your husband, ask the kids, ask your Dr. It's ok not to be ok.

How old are you OP? Google menopause symptoms, it sounds like hormones to me. Lots of women, gradually as their Estrogen diminishes, have the same feelings of hopelessness as you are now. You’re obviously a coper as you’ve got your children this far, remained in a relationship and worked. Don’t give up, please get help.

Can’t you see how this is impacting on your kids? They are moaning cos they are picking up on your mood. I’m sorry but you owe it to them to get some help. Poor kids don’t even have a Christmas to look forward to. Please please do it fir them if not yourself.

Op, for your children's sake, get yourself to the gp and seek help for your depression. Your kids won't care that there are others out there in worse shape or that the gp surgery is busy - they need one parent to make their home less miserable than the world outdoors.

No my kids moan anyway. One has asd and adhd.

OP your depressed to the point that you want to die. You need to sort this out, I know it’s not easy but you need to seek treatment if not for yourself then for your children.

Life is more difficult in some ways there are positives out there but it’s tricky to find them when you are depressed. Please make an appointment with your GP.