can't motivate myself to do anything - please give me a nudge

[monkeyonthetable]

I wake up every morning and have zero motivation for anything. There are loads of things I'd like to do or could do but I seem to have an invisible block stopping me from actually doing any of them. I found it hard enough this morning to just have a bath and get dressed. Weirdly, the stuff I most want to do is even harder to get motivated about.

I am managing a walk most days, a bit of cooking, shared with DH and the bare minimum housework. But even the house seems so perpetually grubby from having everyone home all the time, and I don't have energy to clean, only to see it undone within 24 hours.

I feel like I need someone to tell me: do this now. I just can't find the ignition myself.

Anyone feel the same? Or have advice? or fancying telling me what to get started on? I know it seems silly but it is really dragging me down and making me feel deeply self-critical. Slippery slope.

I'm really struggling this weekend. Lots of changes of meds, with accompanying side effects, since March. Absolutely can't face getting out of bed although I know it's doing me no good.

Thanks everyone.

Today's achievements are

Getting DS (8) in the shower, he's autistic and this is a big challenge!

Walked the dog.

I'm exhausted now!

I am back to work tomorrow, i'm a dinner lady so only very short hours. So getting a bit anxious although i really want to be back.

Welcome @dementedma, it's really interesting that your walk seemed to kickstart a good day yesterday. I hope today has been good too, or not tomorrow is a new day....

@Terralee sending you strength for this period of adjustment to you your new meds. Did you go for a walk with your mum?

@toffeeghirl how has today been? There's some lovely advice in this thread for days when it's hard to step out of bed. Are you able to scroll through and have a read and see if it helps at all?

@SpockPaperScissorsLizardRock hope your first day back at work goes well tomorrow. All these things that used to be so normal are stressful now when we've avoided them to stay safe before. Hopefully your colleagues will be supportive. Maybe try to take things one moment at a time, keep breathing and be kind to yourself- it's fine and very understandable to feel nervous.

@chaotic - thank you

@Chaotic45 thankyou. I managed to get up and put a washing load on. Spent the rest of the day binge watching Grace and Frankie.

@toffeeghirl digging deep enough to put that load of washing on was a huge achievement given you didn't feel able to get up earlier today. I love Grace and Frankie and you've reminded me that I haven't watched the latest series! I can't sleep this evening so I'm off to watch it now- thank you.

Morning all! Here is a daily nudge for those that need it.

Had a bit of drama yesterday as DH got cross with DS for being on the screens all day... DH is feeling very neglected and ignored. I have been trying to give everyone the attention they want but feel spreed very thin.

I did go for a run but I got overwhelmed by the pile of stuff I want to deal with. The problem is that everything in that pile is actually a job in itself. Instead of trying to deal with it all I will:

• write a list of all the things in the pile and what I need to do with them
• chose 1 thing From the pile of doom and deal with it
• at work, I’ll sort my emails and then go home.

Have a good day back at work Spock

@toffeeghirl - it’s perfectly ok to do nothing at all when you feel so rubbish

Hope everyone has a good day: a good day is different for everyone btw.
I work so that is my focus but don’t manage much else, but I console myself with the fact all my energy goes into my students, keeping a roof over my head, supporting my beautiful grown up daughter (with father due to lockdown) and family member who is currently living with me due to Covid

@ejecoms sounds like a tricky balance and no doubt you get rather stuck in the middle. 'Pile Of doom' sounds like a perfect way to describe your paperwork. hope you make a little headway with it.

@Valenciaoranges sounds like a very full plate, and more than enough to focus on.

My list for today:

Change bed sheets
Update work diary
Support DS with school work

I also have some work to do this morning.

Morning everyone.

@ejecoms - thanks for yesterday's nudge. I used it to change the bed and have a hot bath - so nice to slip into clean sheets after a bath.

Here's another nudge everyone.

Welcome @toffeeghirl. This thread is definitely to support people who can't get out of bed. We have all been there. I've also had days of binge-watching Grace and Frankie. I used to feel guilty about it. Now I think it's a result - an achievement. Because you are watching something which is funny and kind and about being forgiving and accepting of others and yourself. It's a great show for when you feel down. Therapeutic TV!

If you can, go and sit or stand by an open window, or sit in the garden or on a balcony if you have either of these. Get some air and daylight on your skin. So good for the soul. Stretch your arms in the air, drink a glass of water, maybe eat a piece of fruit - that's bad-day self care.

Yesterday I binged. I haven't binged in ages. I always eat too much but binging is different. Massive craving for white carbs all day long. So today I've decided to go back to a healthy eating weight loss plan (my own) as I am so overweight. Good start to the day - did some journalling and a yoga video and had melon and low fat greek yoghurt for breakfast.

Today's 3 things:
walk
work for 3 hours (getting close to a project deadline)
go to Boots. Local supermarket never has half the stuff we need for self care (DC's anti acne face wash, special toothpaste as we all have reactions to Colgate which is all the supermarket ever has in stock etc.) Not been into town to buy anything for three months. Will be weird.

sounds like a good plan eje
valencia you're dealing with and doing a lot!

I am in bed... this morning I really need to clean the bathroom, oh joy. Could do with walking to a friend's to drop a card in too..

dd last night also saying how she's loosing motivation. have so little for myself let alone kids...

good luck all

You're all so kind, Thankyou. Still struggling. No sleep, no energy and feeling weepy today. Another day on the couch, under a throw with the dog, catching up with G&F.

Work was fine thanks. It was really weird to be back at school but totally fine. I have severe anxiety and depression (that I take meds for).

I am probably Autistic like DS as we are so similar and it's change and the unknown that always freak me out.

Anyway, now I know what to expect and we have some more routine in our lives hopefully it will help.

Take care everyone.

Just dropping in to check in on everyone.

Spock - glad to hear you had a good first day back. I think once you get used to being back, things would settle down. I am a healthcare worker and my DC have been at school the whole time. I was extremely anxious at the beginning that everyone would get infected but it doesn't seem to have happened so I think it's fairly safe.

Toffee - look after yourself. I hope you enjoyed the G&F. Maybe I need to give it a go rather than watching random youtube videos! (My kids have got me into watching minecraft videos - complete escapism!)

Must go but just to say I got my jobs done. I was much more realistic today about my pile but still struggled! Have divided it up into about 12 jobs so will work at them over the next few days!

well done eje

toffee sorry to hear you're feeling rubbish, hope you're cosy.

spock good to have got that first day done.

Well i cleaned bathroom (bath and shower) and downstairs loo this morning. It took hours (hard water, shower had been left...) But good sense of achievement. Walked into town with kids after lunch and we chatted about possible mini holiday in the summer depending on lockdown rules. Nice to think about something fun. We were due to be camping in France but that won't be happening... Since then trying to resist urge for a g&t!!!

Morning all. Hope everyone doing okay.

Monkey - how was your eating yesterday? It’s tough to deal with food in these difficult times. Thinking of you.

colouring Sounds like you have had a productive day and a nice walk. We have booked a week in a self catering cottage about 40mins away from us in July. I figure we can social distance there!

I am hoping to deal with 3 things from the Pile of Doom today!

Morning everyone,

Spock - glad your return to school went well.
colouring well done on the hard water deep clean of your bathroom. We have really bad limescale here. I need to attack the shower head - amazing it still lets water out! Hope you get your break. Fun to plan.
eje congratulations on getting all your jobs done. Good luck with that pile of doom.
toffee sorry you are struggling. Honestly, it's fine to be cuddling a dog and watching escapist TV when you feel so low. It's an illness. That's how people recover from other illnesses. Just be kind to yourself. Have a stretch on the sofa. Maybe have a bath and wash your hair if you can. Drink enough fluids. Try and spend a tiny bit of time in the fresh air, even if just at a window or having a cup of tea on your doorstep. It's weird how tiny things like this help.

Yesterday went well. Stuck to very healthy eating, did yoga, went for a walk with DS2, did a mega shop at Superdrug, did some work on the freelance project I have going at the moment.

Today:
I'm aiming for short sessions of yoga, kettlebells and a walk - I want to get fit again. My weight is a problem.
supermarket shop
2-3 more hours on work project

I really want to focus on just these three things. If the list gets longer I get all judgemental about what I've not done, not what I've done.

How did you do today monkey? I think you’re right to focus on 3 things, I can’t remember more than that! I’ve worked on my pile. The trouble is that they are not simple jobs - for example, there’s a couple of things I want to return which I’ve packaged up but now I need to take that to the post office. I’m doing that for tomorrow’s job.

Glad that you had a good day and eat healthily

Can I join in please? I've hit a total slump the last week or so. I don't want to let it go down any further. I've spent the last few days under my blanket.

House is a total mess. I moved in recently but it's all things waiting on something else to be done, so still pile up of boxes with nowhere to put stuff.

Today wins are I've managed a toastie and hot chocolate.
Fed the kittens, scooped the tray, given treats (yes I know that's scraping the barrel for wins)

Tomorrow I need to pick up my week prescription in local chemist so I need to drag myself in to the shower in the morning as if chemist has any concerns about my mental health he will refuse the meds and contact the cmht.

I need to try and make food as otherwise a load of stuff will go off.

@monkey Thankyou, I took your advice. Managed a bath and washed hair. Also had a cup of tea outside and played fetch with the dog for a bit.
@NotanotherboxofFrogs I empathise. Hot chocolate sounds lovely. How many kittens do you have?

@toffeeghirl. Two kittens, they are almost 11 weeks old. I'm back under my blanket and being cuddled up to which is nice. Love the little warm purring bodies lying on me. What sort of dog do you have?

I'm also feeling crap from antibiotics from aspiration pneumonia so I know I need to take it easy but I can see the slide downhill and want to get off it.

I'm going to aim to load up the dishwasher later, empty the dryer and sort the drying into piles.

They sound adorable. I'm back under my own duvet now. Snuggled up with the dog (she's a daft as a brush staffy).

Hope you get your jobs done but be easy on yourself. Your recovery is more important and they can wait another day.
I've managed to put the kids clean washing away. The basket was piling higher couldn't put it off much longer!

Well done everyone on what you achieved, however big or small. I struggle with goals in case I don’t achieve them. I taught 4 live lessons today, two meetings and planning/ adding data/etc.Still can’t seem to leave the house though or do any form of exercise. I was so good for the first three weeks of lockdown, then hit a wall.

I've drunk too much 😪