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Thread for those with adult ADHD or who think they might have ADHD

341 replies

Borntobedifferent · 11/04/2019 19:34

So I've put this into mental health as although it isn't really a mental health issue it tends to be discovered (in adults) when there is other mental health issues.

I've written a few times elsewhere on here about my ADHD but thought it might be nice to have an ongoing thread.

All that i ask is that we focus on adult ADHD as I'm sure there is other threads for those with children with ADHD.

I am nearly a year diagnosed now (I'm 37) and am on Elvanse 40mg and amfexa 5mg first thing in the morning.

I am so on 200mg sertraline and diazepam as by the time I was diagnosed I was just totally broken.

I have a therapist and today I started with an ADHD coach, I have to learn to accept my past and to embrace the positives of ADHD but it's not an easy thing to do.

OP posts:
threedeepatthebar · 09/05/2019 09:12

Forgetting most of you are probably in England where you pay anyway! Sorry Blush

BertieBotts · 09/05/2019 09:17

Well, only a prescription charge. I don't think it's a silly thing to worry about - the medications can be expensive. I don't know the answer though, sorry.

BertieBotts · 09/05/2019 09:21

I really must move forward with the stimulant meds. I'm dragging my heels about it because it involves making an appointment Hmm

BertieBotts · 09/05/2019 09:22

In fact the ADHD tax strikes again. I've just been hit with a late fee for not paying for part of my therapy yet Blush Ooops. So that's €10 extra.

Gingernaut · 09/05/2019 14:42

The magic words are Prescription Prepayment Certificate.

If you pay NHS prescription charges and hqve more than two prescriptions a month (I have six!) this is a major help.

£10.40 a month by DD for all prescriptions.

But it takes about two weeks for the new card to come through at the end of the year, so make sure you have enough meds to cover you for that period.

www.nhsbsa.nhs.uk/help-nhs-prescription-costs/prescription-prepayment-certificates-ppcs

BertieBotts · 09/05/2019 15:28

She's not asking about prescription charges but whether you can have medication prescribed on the NHS if your diagnois is private :)

Gingernaut · 11/05/2019 00:07

That's for the consultant and the GP to discuss between themselves.

Grompf · 14/05/2019 11:47

Hi All,

I've recently approached my doctor for a referral to our local mental health clinic regarding an assessment for ADHD as I think I have many of the symptoms, which he agrees with. Our local area waiting list is at least a year to get an appointment, so I'm considering paying for a private assessment. This is where I get stuck! Is there a particular website I should go to, to look for someone? Anything I should be looking out for or questions to ask? There doesn't seem to be a lot of choice to see someone in my region face-to-face, so I may have to travel. I've also come across some 'national' online clinics that do video meetings. Are these best avoided?

Thanks :)

strongandlong · 14/05/2019 18:42

I'm in the same position, Grompf. I'd be really interested to hear about anyone's experience of private diagnosis.

I can't remember what made me look into Adhd, but my mind has been blown by how much of my life makes much more sense. From behavioral problems at primary to the numerous piles of stuff all over my house...

Toughmonkeys · 17/05/2019 19:44

I've been at the doctors this week and I'm being referred for an asd/adhd diagnosis. It could take a while though as all services in our area are understaffed and overworked. It's taken me over a year to decide to do this. My daughter is also now seeing someone for similar diagnosis. Can someone tell me about the medication you can get for adhd, does it help settle your head/thoughts?

BertieBotts · 17/05/2019 21:35

Yes some people find that it does. It doesn't seem to have that effect on me, but it might be the dose or something like that.

toffee1000 · 06/06/2019 21:13

So I mentioned getting properly assessed for ADHD to my counsellor and she emailed me a few forms to fill out. I have an appointment on the 22nd to discuss the potential use of medication.

Lalalalasee · 06/06/2019 22:55

I requested a diagnosis for ADHD through the GP about 5 years ago. I had ongoing anxiety and work in education so am very familiar with ADHD and decided I wanted a diagnosis. was referred to a psychologist but he admitted to having no idea about adult adhd. He told me verbally that I probably had high functioning ADHD but said that in many ways this had helped me in life and that I would probably not had the successes I have had without having those traits in the first place. He said there wasn't much point in getting a formal diagnosis and asked me what I was looking for, and told me the drugs ar really unpleasant. And then he didn't diagnose and his write up suggested I might have a personality disorder. I haven t ever followed up on this but I think it's time as my anxiety is sky high at the moment so I think I should ask for a second opinion

grumpyyetgorgeous · 07/06/2019 04:08

@Lalalalasee sorry you had this experience, the psychologist doesn't sound very knowledgable at all. In a way I'd like to seek a diagnosis but fear this type of professional. I think one of the main reasons we look for a diagnosis is for validation rather than treatment a lot of the time,

Lalalalasee · 07/06/2019 10:43

I desperately need to be reassessed. Been on anti depressants to treat anxiety ever since I had DC2 as that's when I stopped being able to cope but it hasn't made it any better because I realise they are treating the wrong condition.

When I had my assessment I was accidentally half an hour early, I had the time written down correctly but at some time during the day I changed it in my head. I was actually panicking when I turned up because I thought I was late. When I turned up the receptionist was using headphones and she barked at me that I was early and so I went away and came back at the allotted time. She was still wearing her headphones. I felt that she was still annoyed with me. I could only assume that I had interrupted her lunch break.

I’m not very good at being told off... because I forget stuff all the time I am constantly worried that I am going to get told off for it and as a result i find myself being very defensive when criticised. So I really didn’t feel comfortable asking the receptionist what was going on when after 30 minutes no one had come to get me. I was under the impression that I was the first appointment after lunch so it seemed weird that I hadn’t been collected- I assumed I’d been forgotten about or something and I began to feel really anxious.

After about 40 minutes a very stressed woman came out and told me that I would be seen soon. I now get that she was stressed but I was already anxious and the way she spoke to me made me feel like I was being told off yet again. When she went away i couldn’t stop big fat tears running down my face. It was weird, I never cry in public but I just couldn’t stop it. When the psychologist finally came to get me about 10 minutes later I was properly crying. So he then was just convinced that I had this terrible anxiety disorder and that ADHD wasn’t the issue.

I do have anxiety. But it’s because I am so all over the place scatty that I forget so much that I am always in a heightened state of worry that I might cock up yet again. DH finds it so hard that I say I will do something and then promptly forget. That’s fine when I say I’ll make him a cup of tea and forget why I went to the kitchen. Not so fine when he has an important meeting the next day and I forget to pick up his suit from the dry cleaner. He’s fed up with not being able to trust me when I say I will do something. And it makes me feel crap too.

I am so glad I found this thread because it’s made me determined to go to the doc (I now live in a new area) and request a new assessment and to ask for a specialist this time! I just need to remember to make the appointment/turn up for it/turn up for the assessment on time!! Only 3 hurdles to go...

toffee1000 · 07/06/2019 12:25

I also hate being told off!
I’m also very good at saying the “right” thing (ie tidying my room, etc), like “oh yes I’ll go and send that email” or whatever, I’ll go off but not do it. Although sometimes I do do what I’m told so that kind of contradicts what I’ve just said Grin
I do best with proper boundaries, structure, deadlines. My life doesn’t have that right now. I have some regular things I do every week, mainly volunteering and the counselling, but altogether that’s only around ten hours (or less) out of my whole week.

BertieBotts · 07/06/2019 13:36

Yeah, DH also struggles with not being able to rely on me to do things - we have our ways around this which mostly work now, (text reminders, having it as my only task planned for the day, on the calendar, etc) but it's pretty devastating to essentially realise you're not actually a responsible reliable adult when you believe this to be an essential component to marriage. I am in many ways what I would think of as unmarriageable and it makes me cringe. I fall short of my own parenting standards too which bothers me a lot.

lukins66 · 07/06/2019 13:56

This is all so interesting & sounds very familiar to me.
Thank you to everyone for being so open & honest. It has helped me tremendously. I've been struggling for years & only in the past couple of years have realised I may have inattentiveADHD.

Lalalalasee · 07/06/2019 14:04

I've been catching up on this whole thread bit by bit and just read @DoNotTouchTheTree's post about getting diagnosed. I know I need to go back and ask again to see a specialist. At least I can say to the Gp that the psychologist admitted it verbally although he didn't feel confident enough to officially diagnose. Twat should have referred me up if he wasn't sure. That's 5 years I've lost where I could have been being treated!

toffee1000 · 07/06/2019 14:45

BertieBotts sometimes I feel like I’m not really relationship material either. I have never been in one (various reasons). I’ve never had a problem with the way I look - although I can definitely make more of an effort - it’s more to do with the way I can be negative about myself, the way I’m not good at keeping on top of things etc. I might be ok in the initial “honeymoon” type period where it’s mainly about dating etc but moving in together would be difficult. Hopefully I can improve in some areas, and also that any future partner would be supportive and understand that I find some things difficult.

Lalalalasee · 07/06/2019 22:05

Does anyone with ADHD/suspected ADHD take St John's Wort?

toffee1000 · 08/06/2019 01:16

Not heard of St John’s Wort for ADHD. What’s it supposed to do for it?

grumpyyetgorgeous · 08/06/2019 06:19

Just googled this and there's a few studies saying that it's ineffective. Would be great if there was something herbal that would just take the edge off.

HelenaHandcart · 10/06/2019 16:48

Hello

I've just (this last Friday) been diagnosed with ADHD, ASD (the type which used to be called Asperger's), and PTSD. At the age of 40 Confused

This has all been quite a bit of a shock to me, but I suppose it explains a lot. My sense of self (which I thought I had a sense of) has been shattered. I actually felt quite positive in the days leading up to the assessment, but am very deflated now, and not sure where that disappeared off to. I don't understand how this has been missed for so long. I don't really understand what it all means for me in the future. Did anyone else feel like this? More alienated after a diagnosis? How long did it take for you all to process the diagnosis and reassimilate it into yourself? (if that makes sense)

toffee1000 · 10/06/2019 17:04

HelenaHandcart (great punny username by the way) that’s an entirely normal feeling! I still feel slightly strange about my ASD diagnosis and that was over 18 months ago now. It’s probably particularly difficult for you as you got three diagnoses at once (did I read the post right?) I don’t have any kind of diagnosed mental health condition; I recognise bits of myself in anxiety and dysthymia (low level depression) but not enough for a full diagnosis, I don’t get physical anxiety symptoms for example.
I am also not doing very much right now. I’m due to start an internship next month (set up through the help of my therapist, it’s offered via an autism charity and is with the civil service) which should be fun, but it’s only three weeks.
I’m also only fairly young compared to a lot of people on this thread (24 next month) and there are a lot of life experiences I haven’t had yet. It’ll be interesting to see how I am in, say, 5 years’ time, if I get an ADHD diagnosis and appropriate medication, have a job and partner etc.