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Original poster

DS missing from psychiatric ward

134 replies

Masie24 · 16/10/2018 18:05

Young adult son is under a MH section and has gone missing from his ward. Police are involved. He was allowed some unsupervised time yesterday morning but didn't return. We weren't informed until very late in the evening. He's on aripiprazole though won't have taken it since yesterday.

Police will be using social media in an attempt to locate him.

Worried stiff. And trying to hold down two jobs and care for other DCs. DS has a long history of disturbed behaviour and suicide attempts. I can barely keep things together.

Any suggestions or encouragement would be gratefully received.

OP posts:
Original poster
Masie24 · 17/10/2018 04:59

So many thanks for your messages. I haven't slept a wink and am up with a comforting cup of tea and Mumsnet. I have work tomorrow and in the evening but anything is better than lying in bed, unable to sleep, crying and possibly waking DH up.

Annandale - I'm glad DH came home safely. DS has gone missing a lot in the past. It's a surreal feeling, isn't it? You're right about the police network and of course it can include British Transport Police who in fact have DS on their radar, too.

WerewolfNumber1 - I hope that your sister stays safe and well. Thank you for sharing that.

I'm surprised that the ward haven't been in contact and that they contacted us quite late in the day, 10 hours after DS went missing. There's an additional worry now. We found out through the police that another patient has been missing for a few days. DS spoke to us about him, saying that this guy had made promises of work etc. The police, think there may be a link which makes me even more worried as we know very little about this person and his networks.

summerlovingliz - thanks. Time off work is a very good idea. I'll see what I can do about that.

Was hoping that that DS could be traced through the use of his bank card but apparently banks only divulge such information in 'high risk' cases. Does anyone know anything about this?

Thanks, again, for listening. Any news and I'll update.

OP posts:
NotMyNameButHereForever · 17/10/2018 05:17

Oh sweetheart. Nothing to add but couldn't read and run. I'm so so sorry you're going through this, it must be utter torture Flowers

The ward do sound remiss although that's probably something best picked up on when he's (hopefully) back safe and sound. I would have thought the Police could absolutely have access to his bank details/transactions etc in the case of a missing and vulnerable person, have they told you that they can't?

Sending huge UN-MNy {{{hugs}}}
FlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowersFlowers

LuluBellaBlue · 17/10/2018 05:20

Hope today brings good news Flowers

Original poster
Masie24 · 17/10/2018 05:25

Thank you very much NotMyNameButHereForever and LuluBellaBlue for posting at this time in the morning. Hugs and flowers are very welcome.

Agree about picking up any shortcomings once DS is safe. And about the bank. I've given the police all the information they need to be able to work with his bank to find out where he last used his card. They suggested that I phoned the bank but that really isn't like to have any effect. I have no legal guardianship over DS as he's over 18. I'll chase this up in the morning.

Again, thanks. Hope today is good for you all.

OP posts:
WonderBoy · 17/10/2018 05:28

Hello OP. Just about the bank card - I think you, or rather the police, can argue that he is a high risk case because of previous suicide attempts and being without his medication. Don't lose heart - he's always been found before, and the likelihood is he will be this time. Keep putting the kettle on, but try to keep your strength up by eating a little and getting some rest - I know it's the last thing you want to do, but you need to stay well, don't you? Wishing you all the best, and a safe return for your DS. Flowers Brew

Original poster
Masie24 · 17/10/2018 05:42

WonderBoy Thank you. I'll redouble my efforts re the police and bank. I think DS is high risk, too - previous suicide attempts (when in fact he was under an earlier section), lack of medication and years of routelessness. Thank you for your kind wishes. Appreciated.

OP posts:
Roystonv · 17/10/2018 05:46

Nothing useful to add but wishing you and your family all the best at this worrying time. Bless you all and may your son come safely home to you very soon.

Summerbabygirl · 17/10/2018 05:54

Hope you are okay OP.

Could you go to your GP to get signed off work for the stress? My Mum had to do this when my brother was sectioned very recently.

No advice but I understand your pain. My brother tried to escape the house before he was sectioned and tried to escape once he was in the hospital. They had to restrain and sedate him Sad.

Like a PP said the police were great and he is now stable and safe. With what happened I didn’t think that would ever be the case but iit is so stay positive. Keep us updated, will be thinking of you. Flowers

DunesOfSand · 17/10/2018 06:09

@Masie24, I hope today brings some good news.
I have nothing useful to add, but the police have been wonderful every time we had a similar situation.

FlowersCakeBrew

Gilead · 17/10/2018 08:31

I have been in a similar situation with dd. All was and is still well with her now. I hope today brings good news, Maisie. Flowers

dangermouseisace · 17/10/2018 13:32

Thinking of you Masie24 and hope you get good news soon.

I was the person on a section that disappeared...more than once, often long distances and for a few days before being found. Your DS probably doesn’t have the foggiest how to comprehend the stress you must be feeling. Police are quite good at spotting people who aren’t ‘quite right’. I hope he gets in touch with you himself.

Original poster
Masie24 · 17/10/2018 22:41

Thank you so much for such messages of support and encouragement. Just back from work.

News: this evening police rang to say there had been sightings in our home town. DS could have been anywhere. He has form in taking off and going very far afield. Now they are looking for him with DH. His usual haunts and elsewhere. They'll take him back to hospital as he's still under a section. Section runs out soon and I'm really hoping that they don't discharge until a plan is in place. DS won't have eaten much for a couple of days and will have slept rough again. And we thought we'd all turned a corner. He was looking so much better over the weekend and we were taking, gently, about his future. Then this.

dangermouseisace I think you could be right re DS's lack of understanding about the level of anxiety and stress that his behaviour causes. I hope you're now well and safe.

Gilead, DunesOfSand and others with DCs and DHs who've been in similar situations - thank you for sharing and I hope that all is well with your loved ones and you now.

I'll update. Again, thank you. In the small hours, especially, your kindness was so much appreciated. I'm taking some time off work soon. Need to work hard on DS's plans once he's found and he's safe and I need to sleep. Been months since I slept more than a few hours at night.

OP posts:
Wagonwheelsandjammydodgers · 17/10/2018 22:46

Really thinking of you and hoping very much that your DS will be found soon.

PositivelyPERF · 17/10/2018 22:50

So sorry you’re all going through this, OP. The fact that he’s been sighted in the local town, is promising. Does he have any friends he might contact? My brother once escaped his secure hospital and walked through fields, in his bare feet, for 10 miles to get home. The hospital weren’t aware he had absconded, though that was 20yrs ago. It’s amazing what people can do. I hope you have good news soon. 💐

Original poster
Masie24 · 17/10/2018 22:56

Wagonwheelsandjammydodgers: thank you for thinking of us.
PositivelyPERF: Moved by your brother's story. I hope that now he's safe and happy.
No news from DH and police looking for DS. Will update. Thank you again, all.

OP posts:
HoleyCoMoley · 17/10/2018 23:00

I hope he is found soon and that he is okay, the hospital need to have plans in place to stop this happening again.

mommybear1 · 17/10/2018 23:00

Hoping for good news for you OP quickly - handhold 

Evidencebased · 17/10/2018 23:01

Nothing useful to say, but thinking of you.

tinytemper66 · 17/10/2018 23:01

Thinking of you 💐

PigletTiggerEeyoreAndRoo · 17/10/2018 23:17

Thinking of you 💐

Naveloranges · 17/10/2018 23:22

Hope he is found very soon 💐❤️

supermodel · 17/10/2018 23:26

Hope he is found safe soon. Lots of love to you and your family.

TetleysSurpassesYorkshireTea · 17/10/2018 23:29

Hi OP. I really hope your son is found soon.

Could it be worth discussing his meds being replaced by a depot injection, which lasts a few weeks? Then if he goes missing again, he is still medicated?

There are also sections whereby if someone is refusing to take their meds, they can be recalled to hospital. Would something like that bring you some peace of mind?

The nurse in charge of your son's care, or ward manager would be a good source of information about this.

Sometimes, the hospital have to wait and see if the person arrives back to the ward under their own steam, before next of kin are told. Plus, police are contacted, hospitals searched etc. It does sound like you were told particularly late in the day though.

Would making a plan with the ward manager, re your DS's care when they find him, help you feel productive?

Thinking of you and hoping your DS is found soon Flowers

ThisIsTheNational · 17/10/2018 23:31

Good luck.

MyOtherProfile · 17/10/2018 23:32

How scary for you all. Thinking of you x