what do you do to help yourself when depressed

[Babettesidsefreyaallthescandi]

Hi,
I am struggling with depression at the moment and getting through the day requires so much effort and determination. I am adjusting to a new medication which probably isn't helping. I am trying to shower every day and wear clean clothes and make something to eat. I can only face food shopping if someone is with me and don't feel confident enough to drive. I know about the principles of CBT and try not to think of negative consequences of being ill( like losing my job and home) but find these thoughts creep in particularly on waking.
What do you do to get yourself through the day?

Thanks Q. Yes DP and DS are both here but they feel helpless as do I. Yes I dropped off a sample at my GP and they said that they would ring back if it was positive - they didn't ring. I had a bad UTI just before xmas and ended up in A&E and was given a one off dose of fosfomycin which helped quite quickly. I have another one off dose at home which I am trying to hold off taking. I don't know what to do for the best.

Did they give you the fosfomycin in case of recurrence? If so and you recognise the symptoms then may be the best thing to go ahead. You could ring 111 and run through your symptoms for confirmation?

Yes, they gave me another sachet but I didn't need to use it at the time. I have definitely got all the symptoms which are just being dampened down with lots of cymalon and water but are not going away. I haven't even got the energy to phone 111.

Well, I’m most certainly not a doctor, but personally I’d take it. Knock the UTI on the head and that’s one thing less.

Definitely take it!

Hope your appt today goes well, Babette. 🌷

Hi Aunty,
My appointment has been postponed until Thursday , so disappointed. I did take the fosfomycin and something called AZO to numb the pain. I am so hoping that the UTI doesn't come back as I am exhausted.

Oh no
Do you have a walk in near you? I hate to think of you in pain until Thursday on top of everything else!

Hi Q,
My cancelled appointment was for my depression. I was really desperate for this appointment. The UTI is also something that I am dealing with. The sample test came back negative but I still have all the symptoms of a UTI and can't settle. I think that my whole body is just exhausted physically and mentally.

Babette, do you have any idea how amazing you are actually doing? Not meant in any sort of patronising way. I've been in the hell of a severe depressive episode twice now and I know exactly how much of a fight it is to get through the next hour, never mind a day.

At my worst, I couldn't shower, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, was in a constant state of hyper awareness due to the acute level of anxiety I was suffering. I honestly thought that was it for the rest of my life. I know what you mean about your life shrinking.

You are managing to shower, managing to have a little run, you are incredibly strong and should be proud of those achievements.

The problem I had most of all, was the guilt I felt for being unwell. Which is ridiculous you know, people cant help it when they are unwell. I felt weak and a burden, selfish and useless. I think if I had allowed myself some kindness and accepted I was unwell, accepted depression takes time to come out of, I may have recovered a little quicker.

Can I ask what medication you are taking and what dose? If that's okay. I am on sertraline after my relapse last June and the start up can be very very rough. It's possibly just too early for you to feel any benefits yet but they will be coming!

Just like last time, this episode will pass. You will be well again. Just now, try to listen to your body, keep hydrated, keep warm, don't watch anything overly emotional or listen to anything that triggers deep emotions. Give yourself as much TLC as you can and take each moment as it comes.

Being outside in nature (even my back garden or a local park) and exercise. Or I can combine the two that's even better. A short walk or gentle bike ride works for me. Gardening as well.

Thank you colly and gm.
I think the guilt thing is hard. I am trying to remind myself that the brain is just another organ that isn't working properly. I can't sustain this level of dependence though as my DP will have to go back to work and DS back to uni.
I am taking Quetiapine after a higher dose of antidepressants caused a bit of hypomania. I was hoping today ( in the appointment that I didn't have) to be allowed to take an antidepressant as well.
Sadly, since having this UTI, I have stopped going on the treadmill and doing the very little I was able to do. Now it is just having a shower. Hopefully, the UTI will be resolved and I will get back to doing more. How long did it take for you to get better Colly?

My first severe depressive episode took 6 months to be functioning a year to feel myself.

Second time took a month to be functioning another two months to feel myself again.

I had an episode just recently after an illness that only lasted a week as I was still on my antidepressants.

I have to be honest and say after my second episode I have no intentions of coming off the antidepressants. I've accepted I'm prone to depression and will have relapses so I take 50mg of sertraline as a maintenance dose.

I thought I was a failure, when I first took antidepressants. Now I know that it's no different than taking insulin for diabetes. Our brains are indeed just another organ and if medication helps, it helps.

There are many antidepressants out there OP, it is going to take time to get the right one but it will happen and you will get well. In the meantime, do whatever you need to, to get through the days.

How are you today, Op?
Has your uti gone?

I‘ve been through episodes of depression and can relate to so much on this thread.

The main thing is self compassion.

Being kind to yourself, in action and thoughts. It‘s quite hard sometimes, but I think it plays a key part in recovery.

If you don‘t manage what you had planned, have a look at the plan and don‘t be overambitious.

For me, therapy helped, but it has taken a long time to find a suitable therapist, and the right therapy.
I‘m having trauma therapy now and it‘s been amazing. It‘s a long journey and I still have days when I get literally nothing done.
I accept it as it is.

On other days I feel almost good and get so much done it amazes me.
Finding the balance is key.
I also do Yoga regularly, also with Adriene on youtube. I read a lot of books about trauma and about my hobbies (beekeeping, wolves) and I try to get out into nature as often as possible.

Hope you are feeling better soon. You will.

Hello OP. I've been here myself and it is agony. Reading your post has brought it all back. But you're reaching out and have support, and both are good for you. It can be tempting to self-isolate, so well done to you for staying connected as best you can.

I hope this doesn't sound glib, but have you had your thyroid tested? And if so, do you know your results? Depression can be a very complex thing so I'm not trying to boil it down to one cause but untreated or poorly treated hypothyroidism can make you feel anxious, depressed, confused, exhausted, hopeless etc etc.

My timeline is different in that I suffered from anxiety, depression and agoraphobia in my younger years (for about 25 years, with only occasional relief). I recovered before my thyroid was treated but proper treatment has done so much for my mood and well-being, I can't even say how much. It was profound.

You may not be able to identify it but there is an underlying hopeful or positive quality in your posts. It reads like you're letting this wash over you which is good. You don't have the negative tone that was relentless in my head and attitude. You're doing all the right things.

When I was at my worst sometimes the only thing I could do was anything, as in thinking, 'I can't have another day tomorrow that was as bad as today, I must do something to make it better.' And I would think of one thing I could do and do it. It could be anything I'd enjoy, like something really nice to eat, or going out for a coffee, or buying a book I wanted to read etc. On a Sunday it was two newspapers and ice cream. It can be hard to identify what you might enjoy when you're feeling such diminished levels of pleasure, but any kind of pleasure is good for you. Comedy was good too. I watched any tv or film that would make me laugh. I saved my Calvin and Hobbes books for when I couldn't get out of bed.

I wish you all the best.

Thank you, I appreciate what you have said. My UTI is still lingering despite me having taken the fosfomycin. It has meant that my ability to do things has further diminished - I haven't been out for days and have been reliant on others for food and shopping. I am thinking that I might have to set up an online order as that would be easier. My house is becoming dirty as I have no energy to clean it and seeing it makes me miserable. I haven't had my thyroid checked but will ask my GP.

If you're getting your thyroid checked you could ask them to check your iron levels. NHS thresholds for what is 'normal' is very low. They told me my iron levels were fine. When I asked for a second opinion I was told I needed a high dose of iron for three months. It's been 1.5 weeks and I feel much much better. I have much more energy and because of that my mood has improved.

For reference, the threshold in my trust is 10ug/L - 390ug/L. Ridiculous. Mine was 40ug/L. So technically normal. But another gp told me anything under 100ug/L will definitely affect your energy levels.

Op, I'm sorry to hear today isn't a good day. I hope you feel a bit better soon.

When you get your blood results ask for a printed copy to take home.

@Qcumber my iron was 19 (similar lab range) despite taking buckets of supplements and the gp wouldn't hear of this being a problem. Gp care can be so variable, which is why I always get a printed copy of bloods.

Yeah it's ridiculous! Like it's not normal! I was fainting just from being stood up for too long always best to get second opinions if you aren't happy.

My gut feeling is that I am not low in iron. having said that, over the last few weeks the quality of my diet has deteriorated as I have not been cooking.
Still feel like the UTI is there and now have an upset tummy because of the antibiotics. I have just taken some probiotics to see if that will help. I wish I could access some complementary therapies which I have used all my life but I can't afford them. Just feel that I am on a conveyor belt to poorer physical and mental health

I have found this thread so reassuring and helpful. I have bipolar and was hospitalised in January for a manic episode. Right now I feel incredibly anxious all the time, fearful of the future and almost defeated by just getting up and facing the day. Whilst I wouldn't wish it on anyone else this thread has made me feel less alone so thank you Op for starting it and sharing.

I have 5 rules for myself to keep my head above water.

~Set clothes and towel out in en suite the night before
~Shower as soon as I wake up
~Eat breakfast
~go outside for at least 20 minutes
~talk to humans other than my children. Even if it means just going to the shop for milk.

I find if I manage the first rule, then getting into the shower seems like so much less effort so I’m far happier to do it. And then once I’m dressed I’m ready for the day and everything just seems to be so much easier. If I forget the first rule then getting up is harder but I try and force myself because the shower seems to be the key for me having a good day or not. So as long as I shower first thing then I’m usually ok.

Being outside is so important. Even just sitting in the garden - I know the crappy weather doesn't help but simply being out in daylight to feel fresh air on your skin is good.

I run to maintain my MH - I know that seems beyond you right now but as soon as you think you might be able to find some motivation try Couch to 5K - it starts so gently and before you know it you have acheived a lot. I am injured atm and I can feel the demons getting closer

One thing that helps me when I am struggling is listing all the things I have done in the day - right down to the tiny things if neccessary - got up, took a shower, brushed my hair, cleaned my teeth, got dressed, went downstairs, put the kettle on..... it sounds daft but the list builds up and you realise just how much you have acheived in a day that othewise just feels like a waste of light.

Good luck xx

Hi 4dogs,
Thank you for your comments. Hope you don't mind me asking, what medication are you on. I am on 150mg of quetiapine and it is not agreeing with me. I haven't been diagnosed yet and I am struggling to come to terms with the possibility.