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Original poster

I have no one to talk to all day.

104 replies

IcingOnTheCake · 08/05/2007 21:32

My dp goes to work at 6am and comes home at 5-6pm. I feel more and more down everyday as i have no one except a 6.5 month old baby. I find it very hard to talk to strangers and instantly put up that protection guard with new people. I have tried the baby groups but no luck. Somedays the people on mn are the only people i speak to all day while dp is at work. I sound like a real sad ass don't i.

OP posts:
Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 11:06

When i talk face to face about stuff, i always end up smiling which then trivulises the issue.

OP posts:
pirategirl · 09/05/2007 11:06

Hello icing,

By being such a strong person, and you are btw, i understand the need to not want to burden anyone with what you have gone thru.

Yet, it is your insecurity in your worth as a person, that makes you think you're not worthy enought to be sorry for yourself, or to be able to reach out about your horribpe experiences.

Not everyone in the world is gonna be like your father, and ignore your hurt.

I have had similar, so know how much you just want to geton with things and cope, but sometimes, as you have put here, its shit not having an outlet to talk.

I have seen a load of counsellors, and it can help. my other saving grace, and a thing I couldnot live without is Prozac.

I went thru yrs of trying to fight this fact, i felt lie i was a failure, to feel better when on it. yet it has helped me cope enormously. I was once on seroxat, and for 3 yrs felt like killing myslef, but it was the wrong thing to be on, and a nice doctor took me off it.

If you can go to your gp, they wil listen, and if they dont, see another one. HV is also a good idea, i really think you will feel better, reaching out like this and getting help.

take care

hugs
xxxxxxxxxx

Malaleche · 09/05/2007 11:07

icing - think you need to bite the bullet and tell your new doc what has happened to you over the years. If they dont have the info they cant help you in the way you need, good luck, have to go out now...

NoodleStroodle · 09/05/2007 11:07

Icing - what about printing off your two big posts and taking them along - not all our wittering and penny's worths but I think your two posts were from the heart. Could you do that?

sniff · 09/05/2007 11:07

malaleche think people think I am too !!!

actually do you think its possible to lose your social skills

Malaleche · 09/05/2007 11:09

try writing it down, i know what you mean about the smiling, i do something similar, when im talking to people i dont look them in the eye, its like i dont want to see their reaction or lack of one or something

Malaleche · 09/05/2007 11:11

sniff - i am definately losing my social skills and confidence the older i get, not that i had much confidence to start with.....ok really have to go now, will check back in later icing, ok?

DimpledThighs · 09/05/2007 12:30

have yopu made your appointment yet icing?

Best wishes - post and let us know how you go.

zizou · 09/05/2007 17:02

Icing, have you managed to talk to your GP?
If you find it difficult to say how you feel face to face, write yourself a note before you go, so that you make sure you leave that surgery with at least a list of counsellors.
It is brilliant that you are facing these things now whilst your dd is still so young. You owe it both to yourself and to her, whom you clearly adore so much, to have some help with these massive issues. You have made the first step by posting on Mumsnet. Now you need to get some professional help to complement the friendly help you can get on here.

Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 17:10

i wanna be able to enjoy my life with my new family and not pass on any of my 'issues' to my dd. i want the past to die a death!

OP posts:
BandofMothers · 09/05/2007 17:15

Where is Bournemouth??I am in Easy Mids. And I recognise you from MN and remember your name

BandofMothers · 09/05/2007 17:16

Or even East mids, not that easy

Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 17:19

bournemouth is on the south coast near the isle of wight

OP posts:
Sparkler1 · 09/05/2007 17:20

IcingOnTheCake

Just wanted to say hi. I've only skimmmed your thread as I'm about to get kid's tea on. Will read it in more detail later.

I live in Poole so very near to you. We have lots of mumsnet meet ups - you should come and join us for one. We are a friendly bunch and love having new people come join us.

Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 17:22

you live in poole, great! well i live in southbourne, bournemouth.

OP posts:
Sparkler1 · 09/05/2007 17:24

We are doing the Mile for Maude on Saturday - why not come and join in?

Sparkler1 · 09/05/2007 17:25

here

mollymawk · 09/05/2007 19:34

Hi Icing. Glad you are going to see the GP. I hope you can get the kind of help you want. I would definitely second the suggestions to write down what you want to say for the GP.

rabbleraiser · 09/05/2007 19:48

Icing ... sorry I didn't get back to your original query. I just had a feeling that we were on the same thread the other day, which means that you're getting known, if only on MN.

I was/am on the bank charges thread, and I liked what you said and thought you were brave to say it. We're in the same camp on that issue. MN can give you a bloody nose from time to time and it's easy to get obsessed with it, but it helps get through the day sometimes.

I do hope you take the invitations on this thread in the spirit they were given, and get yourself out there!

I don't speak from experience. I'm pretty much in the same boat as you, but with a talking ds, not a sleepy one! I never had the guts to get the ball rolling, so good on ya, girl!

Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 20:19

Which part did you like on the bank charges thread, i kinda go on one when i wanna say something

OP posts:
Sparkler1 · 09/05/2007 20:41

Icing have had some time to read through your thread and I think you are amazing. You have been through so much. I totally second the opinion of others with regards to counselling. I've had counselling and it's amazing how it can make your focus on the future and look at things differently. It can never take the past away but can make you see it from angles you never thought you would be able to.
Like I said, if you feel ready to come join us at the weekend. It will be lovely to meet you. If you don't feel quite ready yet then keep an eye on the meet up threads and come and join us for an evening out (without kids - we all need one of those every so often! - we quite enjoy a meal out and just a few glasses of wine

Elasticwoman · 09/05/2007 20:41

Icing, it is not your fault that bad things have happened to you. You are entitled to be angry about the way you have been treated. Perhaps a counsellor would help you express all your repressed emotions in a safe environment and give you a way forward. At least some good things have also happened to you - meeting dp and having the baby. It can't have been easy for you to write that long post where you told us about your past, and for that you deserve respect. You should be able to get counselling free through the NHS and I'm sure your gp would agree you are a most deserving candidate, but gps only have about 7 mins for a consultation and as it can be hard to say these things face to face, could you print out your long post on MN and let him/her read it?

Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 20:48

just a few sparkler

OP posts:
Original poster
IcingOnTheCake · 09/05/2007 20:49

Christina Aguilera's album Stripped has helped me sooo much, has anyone heard it. The woman IS amazing!!!

OP posts:
Sparkler1 · 09/05/2007 20:51

Wink Grin