Paranoid delusions

[Bhj]

Hi. I’ve posted a few times about my psychosis. I’ve been on my fourth anti psychotic, amisulpride 400g for about a month now, no improvement in thoughts. Can anyone tell me an anti psychotic that worked for them where others have failed. Thanks.

Sounds like you have a lot going on Lyra, sorry to hear you’re worried about a lot of things. I don’t think you need to worry about them taking your baby away, as long as you’re complying with medication and as you said you have a good support network. I’m glad it’s the Easter weekend too. My dp is off work from 1pm today and doesn’t go back until Tuesday so I can relax for a few days knowing he’s around. Thanks back, that’s not one I’ve heard of before, I’ll look it up.

Hi it's Ebony, I've name changed.

I'm returning to work on Monday late shift.
It turns out I've got anaemia which has exacerbated my MH symptoms & made me feel quite physically unwell too.

So since last week I've been given iron tablets to take, hopefully I will feel better soon.
I've got to have another meeting with the Matron & clinical leader as they want to know if my disorder will impact on my work.

It doesn't really, I mean I do get paranoid about other staff at work but I try to keep busy & not think about it.
I think I don't really get symptoms at work as I am so busy.
I get stressed but so does everyone.

Glad to hear you are coping with new meds & it's also good to hear that someone with similar issues to me is pregnant- I want a baby but the perinatal psychiatrist made it clear she'd want me to have a partner.
Which is the difficult bit as I'm so shy around men who I like!!

Hi tierra. Look on mind, there is great advice their about wellbeing and becoming a parent. I'd definitely recommend working on yourself and your support network first. I also get fixated on things, eg getting a dog which is hard to explain to other people what you know you want. Just try to do the things you enjoy. And if you really can't have a baby naturally you could always foster or adopt when your past childbearing age. Working in a hospital I hate all the fertility treatments. Personally I'd never put myself through that. I have massive mood swings and everyone thinks I'm just hormonal but I and my doctors and close friends know it's more. Being pregnant though has really made me more confident allthough I spent a lot of time singing let it go to myself. My colleagues are great. I bought myself some stationery today took and having a pj day.

Yesterday, not today

At least you've allready got support before pregnancy. Maybe you'd need to reduce your psychoactive dose first? I'm so stubborn I was on no medication or support and only started it in the second trimester so reality hit home hard, going suddenly from no support to all the support, including social services in 2 weeks. Every day on this new meds is better. However doctors saying they are not addictive is a lie. All psychoactive medication is addictive, as is coffee and sugar. I need a lockable medicine cupboard. I am paranoid about accidentally overdosing if the are not secure. My mental health midwife was not happy when I said we are moving house but it will be so much better, this house is now so triggering as I've had a few panic attacks. She's a bit scary, me and my mum call her the mental medwife.

I hate Google and filter bubbles, I like the name lyra after the book Northern lights by Philip pullman, googled the name for a book review, top searches was that it's a strong psychosis inducing strain of cannibis. I hate Facebook too and am craving macdonalds chips but it makes me sick walking in seeing babies toddlers and children glued to screens. Just means I bought some more healthy but expensive chips from elsewhere.

The psychiatrist says I need to stay on my meds if I get pregnant & it shouldn't harm the baby.

I know what you mean about getting fixated on things.
I usually get a bit obsessive about work so I've had to cut my hours.

I have a new rescue cat that is very nervous so I'm concentrating on caring for her & getting her more relaxed.

Hi Tierra, it’s good to hear from you, I had been wondering how you were doing. When are you back to work? My sister who’s mental health has
Spirraled recently has also been diagnosed with anemia so maybe there is a link. It’s good you have your cat, it’s said having pets can help reduce stress and anxiety. Lyra, are you moving far away? Maybe the mental health midwife is worried if you move too far away you won’t have the support of your family and friends once the baby’s born, that’s assuming you have the support where you live now.

@bj I am moving to a more covinient location, I haven't had a long discussion with the midwife as she sees lots of patients. Closer to the GP, town centre and friends from work. However my family and many of my close friends are not local. My aunt is in the neighbouring town but she's the one with the schizophrenic son. I can't move soon enough and was relieved this morning to find out my husband spoke to the letting agent to reassure them as the buyer was getting anxious. The solicitors were only contacting me so now at least we have the bank holiday weekend for paperwork then my husband has the school holidays so he can focus on house buying. I think I'm developing sziophrenia, could be bipolar but I have no diagnosis. I reasised on antidepressants my first psychotic episode was induced by a virus aged 13 when I'd not had any drugs in my life. I went to hospital but mental health was neglected... I went mute and hallosinated ants crawling on my skin when I had a drip in. I saw every type doctor except a psychiatrist and was never referred to a specialist hospital. I'd forgotten this until I had antidepressants. I need to request my notes. My first documented psychotic episode was during a lone working hospital shift but I didn't have any hallucinations... Might have mild epilepsy...allthough people tell me I'm just hormonal, I know too much...

No high blood pressure or nose bleeds unlike my hospital admission. Since then I've watched a few psychological thrillers... Migraines can lead to panic attacks for me.
@tierra cat sounds great. I love my pets. I'm too hard on myself and get angry at gossip.

I'm back at work on Monday.

My cat is a real project as she's scared of her own shadow it's s shame but I'm hoping to help her get less frightened of people.

Interesting fact the word hysterical comes from the word womb. It was assumed all mental illness came from female hormones and men didn't get hysterical because they are superior. While medical advances have been made and society has moved on, psychiatry is historically based on the oppression of women. Hormones are a big factor, but lack of control is worse. Educate yourself on your own then go to the doctor armed. I would. I mean he's right not to drop the dose for conception but if you improve your wellbeing, no reason you can't go down on the dose if you have a support network. My psychiatrist said every drug goes through the placenta, and newborns can get withdrawal symptoms... So no harm is a white lie, unlikely to cause harm.

Lyra I
Too haven’t been given a diagnosis, just told I have episodes of psychosis. When you mentioned about being in hospital and saw the spiders crawling all over you it reminded me of when my niece was admitted to hospital at the age of 2 with meningitis. She saw the exact same thing and would say “no spiders, go away , don’t like spiders” and she would cry. The doctor said it was a side effect to the medication she was having. Tierra, how are you feeling about going back to work Monday?

I'm a bit nervous about going back to work but hopefully it will be ok

The thinking about it and worrying beforehand are always worse than how it goes on the day I find but still doesn’t help you stop feeling anxious. I’m up to 225mg of clozapine now. Side effects so far has been headaches, dribbling at night, constipation, heartburn and blurred vision when I’m reading. But apparently once my body adjusts to it the side effects should lessen. Glad it’s the weekend and I can lye in until the drowsiness wears off
And not having to drag myself up early as dp going to see to kids.

Closzapine sounds horrible. I hate getting blurred vision when reading, at the moment. I'm going to get some audio books on my phased I love reading and think listing to a story will help me sleep. Maybe a familiar old story like Harry Potter. Had such a bad migraine when I woke up and didn't have the energy to actually get up. My husband muttered 'thunderbolt and lightning very very frightening.' which gave me enough energy to get out of bed and draw out the migraine on my head in washable pen, felt much better its very overcast and high pressure this morning. I'll be OK after my coffee. I'm diagnosed dyslexic and that explains my mind well. When I'm really sleep deprived colours give me physical symptoms. I'm most anxious about medication, even though I'm on the lowest dose I hate it. Really should not be on mumsnet as my maternal instinct are telling me to screen flush the drugs down the toilet. They did originally think meningitis or drugs but it was actually a virus which is less severe than a bacterial infection. Being older I didn't screem out just brushed and itched and stayed I'm bed. I scared my mum when I was trying to go to the toilet to give a urine sample the nurse had discreetly asked for but I couldn't explain and she was try to get me to lay down. They weren't very good with teenagers in the children's ward. Hated the 'magic cream' taking hours to work, I don't mind needles or a but of pain but they didn't believe my mum. It was ants not spiders, I love spiders, and all animals really. Ants creep me out because they come in colonies. Now I'm pregnant I am being patronised again. I look young anyway but hormones and a new hair cut have really given me a cute baby face. I still get id'd and not normally just a glance. I hate that strangers look at me thinking I'm a teenager. I am glad I've bought glasses, I can watch people and not make eye contact. Also help with the migraines. Feel like a celebrity.

Make the most of people thinking you’re younger than what you are. I have the opposite problem, I’ve really aged in the last 4 years since I had my first “episode of psychosis”. I hope your headaches gone now.

Well been at my familys arguing with my sister, adrenaline seems to be keeping headakes but she still thinks I should just not have it. Far better than alcohol for dealing with stress!

I did appreciate looking young before I got pregnant, now I'm fed up. Thanks though.

Sorry you were arguing with your sister. It’s annoying when other people think they know best. Just finished hiding all the Easter eggs ready for the kids to find in the morning.

Chocolate not adrenaline. Happy Easter everyone. Going to church and Focusing on new life not chocolate! Going to cook some breakfast now for my husband,waiting for the sun to rise. Lots of allergies in my family and I don't suffer like most, which is why it got heated. We are very specific about allergies and intolerance and I had a midnight snack of a dark chocolate rice cake and I stayed awake with a headache. My mum was reacting to the celery yesterday! My brother was reacting to the stormy weather as his new car was breaking and my dad had lost his keys then then his manager was messing him around with the rota. Back home and separate for Easter Sunday. Thank god!

Nothing like a family get together to make you feel normal.

I'm seeing my family later as my sisters cooking a roast dinner for tea. Luckily my family are all very normal!!

Haha, my family are normally normal but everyone was very stressed yesterday, as me and my grandma are going through similar grief symptoms. I just knew she would go into hospital after her sister, joy died but dismissed it as a thinking error, or just a symptom of generalised anxiety disorder, knot in my stomach and sense of doom.

My nan died a year ago, she actually suffered from Psychosis too at the end of her life, it was very sad as she was sectioned.

She had no mental illness until she was 90!
The drs think early dementia caused it.