Anxiety support, Hand hold or chit chat come say hi

[Fairydust26]

going through abit of a crappy time with anxiety/health anxiety at the mo so thought it would be a good idea to create this thread. I always find that when I’m feeling anxious writing it down makes me feel a little bit better so hopefully some of you might too and we can support each other through this crappy time as I know it can make you feel pretty lonely. I’m trying to not drag myself back to bed and write today off so I’ve made a cuppa put the heating on sat by the xmas tree and going to try and have a clam Saturday so come say hi

And everyday is an effort to get thou..I need to get back to the doctor ,I just seem to clam up when I get there .(.I name changed from above )

Pinkcoat124 I’m exactly the same when I’m going through a rough patch I spend alot of time online looking for reassurance as to why I’m feeling the way I am. That’s partly why I made this thread so I had people I could talk to that felt the same as me. As for motivation I’m currently lacking a lot of that at the mo so can’t give much advice but I find that starting with the small stuff first makes everything seem less overwhelming!😊.

Nettleskeins glad you had fun at the party😊 big pat on the back for going and not listening to the pain in the backside that is anxiety!.

gttia sorry today’s not been good I’d deffo take up the free hypnotherapy could be a really positive thing!. Don’t feel silly about your dh going away 3 weeks is a long time so feeling anxious is totally understandable.

KenForPM I don’t drive myself yet I too find the thought of it very confusing! Doesn’t help that Unfortuantly ive been in a fatal car accident when I was younger which I think has contributed to the fact I haven’t learnt yet. I don’t know if it’s just me but I feel pressured to learn to drive I hate having to rely on people for lifts ect so hopefully this year I’ll start to learn!.

Welcome Peggyandkitty, Vistaverde , Motherplucker glad your here😊

Vistaverde that makes total sense your defiantly aren’t alone in feeling that way!.

Motherplucker maybe write down how your feeling and give it to the doctor that way you don’t have to worry about not getting what you want to say out? Hugs to you.

I'm a high functioning (to the outside world) anxiety induced person with regular bouts of depression. I just thought I'd post to say: Never underestimate the power of a hairwash.

I hadn't washed my hair in 2 weeks due to a really bad episode. I forced myself to today and I just feel so much better.

Never underestimate taking care of yourself.

As silly as it sounds, paint your nails, style your hair, get a new outfit. During episodes like this, we often forget to look after ourselves.

I think when you start looking how you're feeling - greasy hair, greasy face, no make-up, old clothes and you look in the mirror you start becoming someone you're not.

Looking in the mirror and seeing clean hair makes me remember who I am and to snap out of this.

Thanks everyone for the welcome.

Mother I agree with Fairydust I find writing things down helps me before going to the doctors. It allows me to get my thoughts in order and gain a bit of perspective on how I am actually doing. I do know how you feel though about having days that are an effort to get through.

Pinkcoat I google a lot as well. Sometimes I find it really helpful but others I find that I go round in circles not finding what I am looking for. In terms of motivation I again I start with little things first and try to find easy wins. I also try to keep telling myself that if I don't do things it will make me worse.

Ne I totally agree. I feel much better when I have washed and properly dried my hair. Self care generally is important although I do have times when I struggle to prioritise myself.

I am having a dreadful evening with anxiety. Not good. Every time I think of my dh not being here I go all hot and panicky. I'm so fed up of feeling like this. I was a single mum for years, very independent and now this, how on earth can I view it as a good thing for me, time alone, tv to myself, good for his career and enables us to live in comfort. I just need to view it positively and I can't sorry that's all about me tonight.

Gttia, what has been helping me recently is to break down the emotions, and to think there might be real reasons why I am having an "extreme" response to something. I think there is always a root which is perfectly justified in every anxiety response, at some point in the past, there was something that did mean separation or travel or navigating or visitors was a genuine source of upset (all the things that worry us) I think we are too quick to dismiss our responses as unreasonable. I don't want to be a pocket counsellor, but perhaps you stretched yourself to the limit being independent, and were incredibly brave as a single mother. And now not surprisingly, you don't want to go back to a previous state of independence, because the value of what you have now is very great to you.

I have similar issues with my children's personal successes and failures. I know I myself could cope with/and did cope with, what I don't feel they will manage - why is that? Perhaps I didn't really cope at all, and am now projecting onto them my own past experiences, who knows...

I think CBT has its limits sometimes professional counselling is important too.

Anyway, I'm sure you didn't want to hear all that waffle sorry this evening has been so awful and hope tomorrow is better.

The other thing that helps is to be less positive and just say, this is shit, it is horrible but I'll get through it...

Thanks nettleskeins, yes maybe that is it. I don't want to be on my own again, even if it is only a few weeks.

Thank you not waffle at all xx

gttia - my DP is away working this week. My DCs are adults and don't live here so I am on my own. I don't think it affects my anxiety problems, though. I'm so sorry you are going through this. I try to arrange a combination of things I would like to do by myself (read a good book) and things that need doing and I will feel better about myself when they are done (having a clear out of paperwork). Not sure if that would help you to channel your thoughts? Hypnotherapy is amazing! I had a few sessions 18 months ago and they helped me through a really awful time.

Thanks so much for starting this thread!

I’ve been feeling quite low lately. Nothing major but you know, this weird dark cloud that won’t go away. Had good days too but never quite 100 %. In the last two years I had two major breakdowns which I managed to overcome. Though I’m starting to feel tired of always having to fight.

Today I called in sick. I went to bed just fine and then woke up this morning before the alarm went off feeling anxious for no reason at all. I spent so much time debating wether to get up or not that it was than too late. So I emailed my workplace to inform them. I told them I had a bad migraine again. But now I feel so guilty and disappointed in me. Especially since I called in sick last week too, I haven’t had one single sick day before that for three months and now it’s going quite downhill. I’m planning to go to the doctor tomorrow because you need some kind of certificate if you’re sick in Germany.

So yeah, now I feel like I need to make myself feel better but on the other side feel like I deserve to feel low because I gave in to my anxiety again

Welcome Reike😊 please don’t feel disappointed in yourself for calling in sick. Treat today as a mental health day eat some good food, watch your fave movie or stay in bed all day of you wish but please don’t feel guilty about that we’re all alowed days like this trust me I’ve had plenty!. Be kind to yourself tomorrow’s a new day which I hope is better for you!

I think I just need a hand hold. For the first time In a while my anxiety had gone completely through the roof. I'm shaking, breathless, feel sick, I'm on edge, exhausted but can't sleep, I feel close to bursting into tears, keep sitting outside my DCs rooms and just listening. I don't know what's caused it or why it's suddenly bothering me, I feel so so close to a full blown attack that not even meditation is helping tonight. My mind is doing overtime thinking about family, friends (doubting myself as a good friend), life in general and it's just not shutting down to rest. I just don't know what to do at all

Hi mumof2sarah.

Can you read a book or play a mind numbing game on your phone? No real advice but I know how you feel, as do others here. Have you got headspace app on your phone?
Big hugs xx

Undercoverbannana

Thank you, I have made a list of things to do in winter evenings and days. I'll get to Easter and think about summer, which is harder because I can't hibernate and sunny evenings at wknd we always go out together. Baby steps, month by month because we don't actually know when it will be. But thank you your suggestion was a good one!! And I've actioned it.
Can you tell me more about your hypnotherapy if that's not to intrusive. Don't feel you have too xx

Well it seems like I just have to worry about something. Like I look for things.
I was alternating between 2 things lately, both of which have turned out fine.
However, I was in such a state of high anxiety that I cannot shake it, even though the reasons for it are no longer. My mind now fishes around for another reason as I can't be feeling like this over nothing.
It just makes no sense to me and I don't know what's worse, being anxious for no reason or being anxious about something you can identify but it being one thing after another.

I suppose I’m a little unusual amongst you guys in that, day-to-day, my main emotion isn’t anxiety/stress. I’m actually OK in that regard. It’s only when I think about my main stressors that I get anxious. Obviously I think about them a fair bit. (Main stressors being socialising, getting a job, potential learning to drive). And of course socialising is probably the biggest one.

Kenforpm i am like that, only get my anxiety when I'm faced with separation from dh overnight. Starting citalopram hoping a low dose will tick along and I can increase when it comes up then once I've had exposure I'll be fine with him away after that. That's the plan

Team meeting today. It's one of my biggest triggers. I don't want to listen or talk or "share my thoughts" or look at them all or be looked at. I have no idea what they're all talking about anyway. I just want to hunker down, be ignored and pray for 4.59pm. My head feels all whirly and fuzzy. I probably shouldn't be driving.

Is he away a lot gttia?

Nights are always the worst, just alone with my thoughts. I think that may be why I watch YouTube videos more these days as opposed to read books; my mind is fully concentrating on what’s going on and I’ve got voices/music/etc in my ears so I don’t have to listen to my thoughts. I do read books, but my thoughts find it easier to barge in when all I have to concentrate on are words on a page.

gttia - Hypnotherapy was recommended to me by someone who had used it themselves. They recommended the same hypnotherapist. She is also a counsellor so the sessions were split between the two treatments. As far as the hypnotherapy goes, she helped me to really relax, breathe differently and talked to me. I don't really know what happened because I wasn't awake and I wasn't asleep. I was just more focussed in my thinking afterwards. Rather than panicky catastrophising and feeling like I was out of control, physically and mentally, I felt able to rationalise better, concentrate and make clearer judgements. I had 6 sessions. I was going through some horrendous stuff at the time and really thought I was dying. I still use some of the techniques she taught me and wouldn't hesitate to go back if I felt she could help me again.

gttia - Hypnotherapy was recommended to me by someone who had used it themselves. They recommended the same hypnotherapist. She is also a counsellor so the sessions were split between the two treatments. As far as the hypnotherapy goes, she helped me to really relax, breathe differently and talked to me. I don't really know what happened because I wasn't awake and I wasn't asleep. I was just more focussed in my thinking afterwards. Rather than panicky catastrophising and feeling like I was out of control, physically and mentally, I felt able to rationalise better, concentrate and make clearer judgements. I had 6 sessions. I was going through some horrendous stuff at the time and really thought I was dying. I still use some of the techniques she taught me and wouldn't hesitate to go back if I felt she could help me again.

That sounds amazing, thank you