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Original poster

Any Self Harmers? 'Excuse' needed...

111 replies

littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:01

Ok, this will sound a bit silly but I need a believable 'explanation' for the scratches around my wrist...

I know I self harmed and shouldn't have done and I am getting help for it (medication & counselling but my mum is coming tomorrow to stay for a week and I really don't want to get into what I have done & why.

Has anyone got any suggestions?

If it helps, there is one biggish scratch on the inside of my wrist, 1 on the outside of my arm, a few small ones on my hand and 2 knuckles are damaged.

Really regretting this now...

OP posts:
Original poster
littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:02

Oh, I'm not a troll btw, I'm a regular going through a tough time & am in need of a bit of support...

OP posts:
gothicmama · 16/02/2007 22:02

be honested if you are getting help them this is a blip so nothing to feel ashamed about imho

Nemo2007 · 16/02/2007 22:03

one of the excuses I have used is being attacked by a cat also one time I said I had been helping a friend dig hedges out in her garden hence the scratches being on arms/wrists.

Nemo2007 · 16/02/2007 22:04

who are you hiding it from? Just being nosey as my dh knew why they were there but it was more extended family like inlaws etc.

Original poster
littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:04

You're right, I know, but it will open a whole can of worms and I really can't face that - I've only just started with the help and want to make a go of it before I tell people - I am embarrased by what I have done but mainly just want to get through it with as little stress as possible...

I like that you said this is a blip - I will look at it that way now!

Thank you

OP posts:
gothicmama · 16/02/2007 22:06

ok go with hedges or cat excuse then.

Original poster
littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:07

Nemo - It's my mum I'm hiding it from. I just can't face telling her atm.

I'm not too bothered about what other people know.

I was wondering if I could say I was moving a heavy box and dropped it and it scraped my arm...

I think whatever I say won't be believable anyway

Feeling very silly now! You'd think I were a mixed up teenager not a 'sensible' mature woman.

OP posts:
morningpaper · 16/02/2007 22:07

very long sleeves

OttergavebirthonValentines · 16/02/2007 22:07

hedges works for me

Nemo2007 · 16/02/2007 22:13

Also did the long sleeves bit but if it is on wrists and dealing with kids then sometimes these things can be seen. I know exactly where you are coming from and a lot of family still dont know I Sh. Also the box scraping is a good one.

morningpaper · 16/02/2007 22:15

yes wrists are difficult - doh! There are some very good booklets by the Bristol Crisis Centre for Women which deal with self harming. They offer LOADS of good advice and really helped me when I was struggling with this, a long time ago now.

Original poster
littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:20

Hmm, wrists are definitely tricky - will have to think more carefully next time!

Will do the long sleeves, but as nemo said, it's hard to keep them down, especially when they need to cover your knuckles.

Have no hedges or cats, so will have to stick to the box excuse when questioned! Unless anyone has any other suggestions. The problem is that now the scratches are really itchy

Thanks for the mention on Bristol Crisis Centre for Women, morningpaper - I'll see if they have a website.

(Congrats otter )

OP posts:
tortoiseSHELL · 16/02/2007 22:22

long sleeves, rabbit/cat scratches - rabbits are really believable, because they kick when you pick them up.

DeputyMacDawg · 16/02/2007 22:25

Bramble bushes cause scratches. Either you were helping a friend with their garden or you were on a country walk?

Original poster
littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:25

Good reason to get a rabbit, eh?!

OP posts:
PuppyDogsTails · 16/02/2007 22:25

Say you have twisted/sprained it and wear a tubigrip elastic thingy

morningpaper · 16/02/2007 22:26

They do have a website - I expect you've found it - it has some useful leaflets online.

DON'T SCRATCH! Cover them up with some plasters or that tape stuff, or use some soothing cream.

Be prepared for your mum to confront you - and know what you will say if she does. Try to make it positive, e.g. "I'm not crazy, I don't want to kill myself, this is just a way of releasing and expressing negative feelings - there are lots of worse things I could do, drinking, cracking up etc. - I am seeing a counsellor who is helping me find other ways to work through issues - etc."

What about some sort of DIY injury... umm putting a flat-pack together? Pulling up carpet?!

morningpaper · 16/02/2007 22:27

I must say that when I do any sort of gardening my arms come up with REALLY awful scratches, I seem to react to the plants or something, it looks AWFUL for about two days. Got a garden... ?

Ceolas · 16/02/2007 22:28

If it's only one hand the tubigrip thing would work.

songbirdforever · 16/02/2007 22:33

Love - know that you're not alone and that you'll get some help for this. Talk to me ...

gothicmama · 16/02/2007 22:34

littlemissnobody do not get in the habit of thinking of teh next time

Original poster
littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:36

A tubigrip is a good idea. Might try that.

They don't look like gardening scratched, I don't think, and I don't have a garden! Some of them are about 1cm wide and 5-10 cm long

You're right, morningpaper, I should know what to say. I'll have a good think and will resist the urge to scratch. I am so cross with myself for doing this - I haven't done it for years.

You have all been really helpful

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songbirdforever · 16/02/2007 22:38

How about just giving it up - and then seeing how you feel?

BURNINGTHECANDLE · 16/02/2007 22:38

Just think how good you will feel if you can tell your mum and really start to put SH behind you. Maybe this is what you really need to do to move on be honest with her and yourself in being able to tell her. I really wish you all the best and every success in the future.

sweetbean · 16/02/2007 22:39

just wanted to say good luck!!

I would go with the tubigrip if poss as you could exsplane the knuckles and everything because maybe you feel over and sprained your rist and bashed your hand, plus you could hide actually showing the scrathches and so she will have nothing to look at and be suspitious of.

I have been through this my self but always had just one big cut and i would say that i burnt it on thr grill but never showed anyone as i was bandaged!!

all the best hun xxxxxxxxx