Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Original poster

Any Self Harmers? 'Excuse' needed...

111 replies

littlemissnobody · 16/02/2007 22:01

Ok, this will sound a bit silly but I need a believable 'explanation' for the scratches around my wrist...

I know I self harmed and shouldn't have done and I am getting help for it (medication & counselling but my mum is coming tomorrow to stay for a week and I really don't want to get into what I have done & why.

Has anyone got any suggestions?

If it helps, there is one biggish scratch on the inside of my wrist, 1 on the outside of my arm, a few small ones on my hand and 2 knuckles are damaged.

Really regretting this now...

OP posts:
songbirdforever · 16/02/2007 23:20

I just think you're such lovely women. Why fight?

sweetbean · 16/02/2007 23:21

I feel terrible that you thought i was talking to you !! i have been where you are and you have my complete support !!!!!!!!!! xxx

misdee · 16/02/2007 23:22

littlemiss, i hope you find soemthing that works for you soon, but in the mean time stay safe please.

goodnight

sweetbean · 16/02/2007 23:22

Why fight what?

songbirdforever · 16/02/2007 23:25

Just think it's so much better to pull together! Goodness knows what's going on outside with the media and all that. It's frightening. Don't buy in to it ... that's my message!

gothicmama · 16/02/2007 23:25

if anyone is interested I have a list of non-harming activities that can help but it is abiyt long to type on here, it basically matches an activity up to how you are feeling whne you need a release.
fo example feeling depersonalised or craving sensation one option is to plunge hands in ice or snap a rubber band on your wrist

PinkTulips · 16/02/2007 23:28

songbird, SH has nothing to do with any of the things you seem to think it does.

it's not a control issue and it's nt some sort of rebellion against anything. it's simply a method of release that some of us find necessary at times, it's not ideal but then neither is binge drinking or many other 'normal' methods of release.

it's intensly personal and the women here have been extremely brave to admit it in public like this and it is so incredibly rude and ignorant of you to post the things you have.

songbirdforever · 16/02/2007 23:28

I think you hAVE TO BRING THESE OUT INTO THE MAINSTREAM GOTHICMAMAMA

sweetbean · 16/02/2007 23:30

Ok so last post of the night as it my dd birthday on sunday (shes 2) and i have to go to tesco vvvvvv early to avoid the crouds and do a monster b day shop but just wanted to give a massive {{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}
to everyone and please keep safe ! xxxxxxxxx

songbirdforever · 16/02/2007 23:32

PinkTulips - so sorry that you think I was rude. I really didn't mean to be. I wouldn't mean to be rude to anyone. Sorry.

PinkTulips · 16/02/2007 23:32

night sweetbean, and happy birthday toi babybean

hope all goes well on the big day xx

sweetbean · 16/02/2007 23:34

ok just have to say one last thing rude though it may be... songbirdforever i think its time you left to !!!!!!!!!!!!! you ovouisly have nothing productive to add to this tread please go away !!!!!

PinkTulips · 16/02/2007 23:36

hear hear!

sweetbean · 16/02/2007 23:36

ok am realy going now thanks for birthday wishes pinktulips xx

gothicmama · 16/02/2007 23:37

feeling Angry Frustrated Restless
Activity : something physical and violent but not directed at you or anything living
rip up newspapers, use a pillow or cushion to hit wall, dance to music , throw ice at bath / wall until it breaks, flatten tin cans etc.

feeling sad, soft melancholy depressed unhappy
Activity something soothing
pamper yourself
visit talk to a friend
do something that makes you feel taken care of

feeling crving snesation, feeling depersonalised, dissociating, feeling unreal
Activity: something that creates a sharp physical sensation
squeeze ice hard
put finger in frozen food for a min
stamp your feet
focus on your breathing
bite into chilli pepper or piece of ginger

the Bristol crisis service for women has some ggod publications you can find them www.users.zetnet.co.uk look under B

PinkTulips · 16/02/2007 23:48

hmmmm, all good but the problem is that at times i've been bad i've gone through all of those, especially the throwing/hitting/ice ones, and still ended up cutting myself. or punching a wall til my hand was bloody

3andnomore · 16/02/2007 23:56

climbing up a fence cor brickwall without being fit, ie not properly pulling yourself up...could be an explanation! Hope you are dealing with your feelings...

3andnomore · 16/02/2007 23:58

Pinktulips...from a proffesional point of view...what could hav stopped you self harming or mad ea situation less concerning to cause selfharming...sorry, I am naive..but would love to understand!

PinkTulips · 17/02/2007 00:05

the only thing that has ever stopped me is my kids...... even while preegnant with dd i couldn't stop but when she was born something inside of me found a focus and i've rarely been at that point in 2 years.

my pregnancy with ds was the only time i've made serious cuts since she was born and i've scratched with my nails a few times but compared to before her birth when i was SHing about 3/4 times a week, often seriously it's a massive turnaround for me.

i don't know whether it's just that i'm so tired and busy with them as they're little and it'll become more difficult as they get older but time will tell.....

3andnomore · 17/02/2007 00:08

((((pinktu;ip) I would lie if I say I understyand but I wish you all the best and that you find the reason for yourself and the answert to it!...Hope that makes sense and isn't taking in a way that I am patronising....

PinkTulips · 17/02/2007 00:11

thanks 3andnomore it makes perfect sense.

now, i'm off tombed before ds decides to wake up....night all!

littlemiss, i hope i've been some help and you manage to hide it from your mom.... nothing worse than 'that' conversation when you're not strong enogh for it.

{{{{{hugs}}}}

Original poster
littlemissnobody · 17/02/2007 02:59

Ok, in a bit of a panic, I went to the late night chemist and bought a sports wrist support thingy. It looks a bit much but it serves two purposes:

  1. Will (hopefully) make my 'slipped on the ice' explanation seem a bit more believable and (unless of course she is an MNer herself, in which case I have outed myself!)

  2. Stops me from scratching it! The pressure also feels good and I think that may help.

songbirdforever, I am not sure that you really understand what self harm is about. We all have our reasons for doing it and it's not for fun. I want to pull myself together and get over this and that is exactly why I am having help. I can't do it alone.

I am doing my best to stay safe, thank you all for your understanding.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY babybean.

OP posts:
DeputyMacDawg · 17/02/2007 10:57

How are you feeling this morning?
Glad you got the support (both physical and emotional) that you needed.
Have you looked Self harm network site.
They helped me a lot in the past.
Take care, {{hug}}

sweetbean · 17/02/2007 12:20

Morning everyone how are we feeling todayx
i have done the battel of tesco's and won overconing 2 major obsticals:

  1. Being ID at the check out for the 6 bottels of wine i bought IM 27 !!!!!!!!! and not sure weather to be insulted or flattered ? but managed to get passed the checkout girl by say that i would want to speak to manager if she didn't let me buy them (i had no id on me )
  1. nearly being run over as someone reversing out of a disabled space without loking and hit the trolly that i was pushing at the time with may dh in it! i went MAD told her amongst lots of other insults that it say disabled on the sticker not blind and that if she can't see then i she give up her driving licence (stupid cow !!)

Anyway all ok now and am of with dh & dd to have a meal at are local, the last bit of peace before tommorw i will check back in later to see how you all are XXXXXX

sweetbean · 17/02/2007 12:23

No sorry not my dh in the trolly actualy my dd !!!