To be wanting some confirmation of reality?

[Greendress123]

I know I get psychosis and paranoia. I'm on a pile of meds. But tonight I'm really struggling with thoughts of nanobots in my brain controlling my thoughts. I know it's not true but I also think it might be true. It's definitely possible, I read an article about it in New Scientist.

Anyway, is anyone up to help me work it out?

Restless tonight.

I think you will get more expert help in MH. I certainly don't know the side effects and interactions of different meds at all.

Yes, everyone does get funny thoughts in the night. You probably know yourself whether it was just that or whether it was potentially the beginning of an episode?

I think if I had self medicated with alcohol/gone for a walk/not had the kids with me that night/any other variable it definitely had the potential to end up in hospital. But it didn't.

You had great self-management at that point, and still do. Would have been so easy to make another choice though, don't you think? I don't know. I guess if there were meds that could just take away that possibility without nasty side-effects then I expect you'd take them in a heartbeat.

Yeah, and I'm definitely 'up' today but in a nice way - I'm restless and fidgety and a bit impatient and jumpy buthe I'm mostly not asleep which is excellent for this time of night when alone.

Hi Greendress123,
Thanks for reporting in, we have moved this to Mental Health as per your request and hope you get good support there.

Being spooked at night can be perfectly normal - especially when nobody else is about.

I hope you can get to sleep.

You may not need your antipsychotic increased but perhaps you do. These people see people with varying degree of MH issues every day and are trained to evaluate need.

I don't know many people with mania but from what I understand you don't often know you're going into it until it's taken full force.

I'm glad your paranoid thoughts have quieten r'd. What are your plans for tonight?

I'm lying in my bed wiggling my feet so much that they ache and chatting on fb messenger. I've got that weird slightly dizzy and breathless feeling you get when you are excited or nervous or have had too much sugar.

Aw, Green dress, I've been there, it's horrible

My psych lets me choose my own dose of meds and as soon as I spot anything out of the ordinary, I up my antipsychotics and get as much sleep as I possibly can. It usually passes after a couple of days and i avoid going manic.

It's great that you recognise it at this stage. The sooner you nip it in the bud, the smaller the ups and downs will be.

Take care x

Ok so I just cleaned the oven and now my boyfriend and girlfriend (yes I have both, please don't judge, we all know about and love each other) reckon I'm manic. I reckon I might be hypomanic

I reckon half of mumsnet is cleaning ovens tonight after that dishwasher tablet trick though.

My thumb is shaking and it's making it hard to type (I'm on my ohone) I think maybe I scrubbed the oven too hard.

No judging from me! Sounds like my kind of ideal.
Do you have any centering techniques? Like meditating/ visualizations? Or having a warm ( but not hot bath)?
Just something that you can really focus on but doesn't mean moving around/being physically active. If you can get your mind focused and calm, you should find that your body will follow.

Visualisations scare me as I don't like to disconnect from reality. I could try doing some of that thing where you concentrate on each bit of your body in turn.

That's a good idea. I do it by tensing up the muscles, starting with my toes and then moving upwards. So lying down, clench toes for a count of ten, then relax. Then feet, then ankles etc etc. Hope it helps.

I'm meant to be going to work tomorrow. I work 4 hours a week when I feel up to it. Not sure I feel up to it but my parents think the routine will do me good.

I'm not going to work - I think I might have talked about nanobots too much to my friend as she said she doesn't think I'm well enough for work, lol

Are you going to see a doctor today? Not sure where the CPN and doctor left it when you saw them yesterday?

Cpn just rang to say I can increase my anti psychotic

Not sure it's the best plan but I suppose it's worth a try.

I've not seen the doctor for a few months, she's just been sending messages through the cpn to increase meds.

Today I've been 'up' but fairly calm. Staying over with boyfriend and girlfriend tonight so I'll be safe (kids are with xh)

Hope you are okay today.

Didn't sleep well but I'm calm today.

Have you increased your meds or decided not to for now? Just wondering as I'm sure it us a hard decision.

Also wondering whether you would like to actually see the doctor or if you are happy with the way things are.

I think ideally I'd see the doctor but it takes a few weeks to get the appointment.

I'm conflicted about increasing the meds. Boyfriend, girlfriend and two friends say yes, mum says no. But mum is a mental health nurse and sees me every day.