Talk to me about adult ADHD

[Thefitfatty]

Just been diagnosed, and started on Concerta. Anyone else not figure out they were ADHD till they were in their mid-30's? Can anyone tell me about their side effects? Or what I can expect now that I'm on meds?

Bertie I keep reading different things everywhere :( in some places I've read that doctors may accept the diagnosis, but can refuse, and they can refuse to prescribe the medication etc, so apparently it's down to the individual doctor? And then others are saying no they don't accept private diagnosis at all... why is it so confusing?

I don't know what the issue is. I try and focus really hard but I'm still getting these tiny errors. Because it's in finance, if you don't dot every i and cross every t, you'll get an error, and they treat it like it's the biggest thing in the world, even if all you've forgotten to do is put your employee number on an internal form that not only has no bearing on the customers or finance itself, but also has your full name, signature, position etc on. They'll fail you on that, so I'm getting constant fails.

There's not enough footfall and although I've taken on a few extra responsibilities it's not enough, so I'm sitting there staring at a screen for hours every day doing absolutely nothing. We're not meant to go on the internet, we have nothing to do if no customers are coming in, so I get fidgety and restless and feel really unhappy there. The work isn't challenging and the little errors they're finding are frustrating me beyond belief.

ovaries I currently do accounts - some voluntary, one I get paid for.
What I find works for me is if I double check every thing and follow an order- so eg doing the payroll I have a how to do the payroll crib sheet. Which if I am feeling distracted I go through point by point. And there are several checks 'built in' to the way I do it - so I double check figures match as I go along.
Actually thinking about it that is a strategy I have used throughout my life - eg I went back to work FT when DD1 was a few months old. At first I really struggled - took me hours to get out in the morning, I'd forget things etc. I thought about what I had to do - took a few days to get a list together and then planned it out. It really was detailed - things like 1. get up 2. wee, take xyz downstairs, 3. put kettle on to boil, 4. empty steriliser, 5. make coffee, etc - and I carried the list around with me ticking things off until it became automatic. DCs older now and I work from home so I have less to do in the mornings so it isn't so rigid but I still have a routine and I have sent DD2 to school without breakfast a couple of times because we deviated from the routine

Ah, okay. That sounds difficult. Will it put you in financial difficulty if you can't keep the job? If it's a literal last resort kind of thing, what about telling them you're currently awaiting an appointment for assessment for adult ADHD? They are apparently supposed to make allowances but I haven't said anything to my employers as I don't think they would take anything seriously. I have made a couple of requests but not said explicitly why. For example if they ask me verbally to take an extra class, I always ask for email confirmation because I know otherwise I will forget. When I arrange my next driving lesson with my instructor I put it into my phone calendar, because there's no way I'll remember it - even though I always think that I will!

Is there anything unobtrusive you can do when you're not actually doing something else, like a phone app, listening to audiobooks with headphones, even something like a rubix cube?

Another option would be to keep the NHS appointment but seek private treatment simultaneously so that if it doesn't work out with private at least you're not starting from the beginning but it is a bit silly.

Yes to a point by point checklist as well, that can be really helpful.

I find the ADHD subreddit on reddit to be excellent.

I've just been reminded, randomly, of this comment I wrote there a few weeks ago. I'll put a link in case it's helpful. I don't know why it highlights in yellow.

www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/4ptcq8/how_to_be_self_accountable/d4p3jr9

We have checklists and we have to do double checking and another staff member checks, somehow I keep getting these errors. It doesn't help that head office change what they check for on an almost weekly basis so it's impossible for me to keep up.

DP is a stay at home dad at the moment and is happy to get a job, and I've applied for a part-time job that is a bit more challenging and seems a bit less nit-picky, so it wouldn't be immediate financial disaster.

Unfortunately no headphones, no phones, nothing at the desks (it's customer-facing but there's just no customers!) so I can't even find something to amuse myself :(

ovaries are they their check lists or yours?
I think if I do my own -so have thought about it - I am more likely to follow it. I struggle to read things like instructions -it is a concentration thing and a check list from somewhere else is like instructions rather than something you own - if that makes sense.
Good luck with the one to one - and don't beat yourself up -
You've no doubt lived with this for years so waiting a month or so for a diagnosis isn't the end of the world and if you lose your job you do have a back up plan...

I went to the GP today for a repeat prescription of ADs and forgot to ask about ADHD! unbelievable ... I was so stressed because the waiting room was fairly full and I had to get back on time.

Anyway, I've another appointment in two weeks, so will ask then. I've printed off and completed the test linked to above, so I'll take that with me.

I have my psychiatrist appointment tomorrow - should I print off and complete tests or just say that I'd like to be referred for testing?

One to one went really well. Basically just all spilled out to my manager who was totally understanding, she's told me that whatever I do is my choice but she will support me completely and if I do leave now, if I want to return in 12/18 months I can, which is nice to know. Feeling much more positive today!

Lol. Sorry, it's not that unbelievable that you forgot (I have done the same thing!)

Ovaries that sounds great! Well done.

Natsaku I think it's worth taking at least a few bullet points explaining why you want referring but if you're already under psychiatry, it's likely they'll agree. IME psychiatrists love testing you for stuff.

Well I went all the way to the next town for my appointment and then realised it was a telephone appointment - little details... sigh
Obviously he couldn't try and assess me over the phone so he told me to make an appointment with one of the doctors in the mental health centre for testing but warned that its very difficult to get a diagnosis as an adult. It'd probably be a very long wait for an appointment too. Thinking I might just go private if my OH will pay for it.

Well that's a start right Natsku. :) Good luck!.

My psych upped my meds today. I'm now on the maximum dose. I feel that makes me extra special.

Thanks

Hehe, extra special

Notice handed in. It's like a weight off really, I'm looking forwards to a change. How's everyone else doing?

Huzzah!

I am so far managing the summer holidays. It's been four days so I'm doing okay

I stayed up too late reading the new harry potter on a whim and forgot I have to leave for driving... right about now. Hope I have enough coffee in my system to focus

Well, turns out HE forgot. Not me, for once. So I am at home but I will wait to text and ask what happened because I hope it will create maximum guilt and I'll get 2+ hours later in the week

Hello, did everyone forget about the thread?

Turned out my driving instructor was in hospital so I had a week off but really got back into it today and still loving it. I did zone out a bit on a really long straight road though which was alarming. I had to keep reminding myself to do mirror checks to give myself something to do.

I'm quite stunned to have found this thread - so many of the comments could have been written by me 🤔😀

I've never talked to my GP about it as I've tended to concentrate on my PMT symptoms - which have worsened recently, probably because I'm peri menopausal. So I started taking Fluexetine 20 mg three weeks ago and it seems to have helped with my mood swings. However, I'm wondering if there's another treatment out there for me, as my lack of concentration is (& always has been) quite a problem.

I've suspected ADHD for a while. I'm prone to interrupting and conversation hopping but at the same time I'm quite good at stopping myself from doing it ( I'm not sure if my DP would agree with that!).

I'm always going into shops and then forgetting which way I came in when I go out! Sat Nav is a life saver as I can never remember routes, even driving in my local town is a challenge.

I become a bit obsessed when I do have a project - like a job application or researching something I'm buying. So if I'm buying some jeans online, I'll spend hours looking at all the diffferent options.

I read an amazing interview with Rory Bremner a while ago & identified with so much he said about his ADHD and how he'd started to have treatment for it. It. Until then, I'd never thought of it being an adult condition. Although actually it is quite an open joke in my family as I have three brothers who are similarly forgetful to me and quite a few of my nieces and nephews have been diagnosed with it. My son is 9 and although he's doing well at school, his teachers do say concentration is a problem - as I know of course!!

My main challenge at the moment is getting back to wrk. I've had a series of temporary jobs since I had my son, my last one finished 18 months ago. I'm very good at postponing it though 🤔

Hi, ok if I join?
I'm 36, got diagnosed at age 32 after battling past a GP who told me I was depressed, and a psychologist who thought I might have ASD despite me waving Delivered From Distraction at her. Diagnosed at Wakefield, put on Equasym and now gradually improving my life.
Had to go to CBT for confidence and self esteem which worked far better than I expected. Left my EA husband and now trying to get a better career. Learned to drive before meds; meds help so much! I struggle with social stuff; not good at remembering birthdays etc, have a general downer on myself and think I witter on and am boring (I do the 'life story' thing!). Have had a look through this thread and downloaded a timer as have some paperwork to do urgently today!

Thought this was interesting.

broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/adhd-women-better-together-festival

Hi Wriggler! Sorry I don't think people are ignoring you - it's the nature of the beast that we all tend to forget about chat threads. It's happened to every ADHD thread I've ever been on, anyway.

My driving is going well and I am due to take the test in a couple of weeks. Luckily I don't seem to find it too difficult to focus because there is so much you need to be aware of that it just kind of works.

Hi, recently diagnosed ADHD inattentive type, currently trying meds and coaching with great success in some areas but procrastination still the big bugbear. Need to rtft but placemarking so that I remember to come back!

Hi all

Sorry to revive a thread but could do with some advice from my own iyswim

Still not sure whether it was the ADHD or my thyroid playing me up as the necessary dr switch means my blood results got lost and there's a refusal to re run them. However I've been showing signs that I've been in thyroid flux so i think it probably is thyroid issues aggravating my existing ADHD.

I've begun to realise, whilst dealing with dd going through the same issues, that my parents and naturally now further family always saw me and still see me as the problem child. Nothing I do will be good enough. Someone can be horrendous to me, I'm always pressured to be the person who apologises but if the situation reverses I still have to apologise.

Has anyone found a way to deal with this?

Crap. Name change does help. I was strictly

Sorry!

I thought I had adhd as a teenager, but brushed it off. Always in trouble at school, totally unable to stay in one place or on task. A few people at work have commented (possibly jokily) that I must have it. I can't imagine going to the GP though. I worry theyd think I'm wasting time.
I'm awful for flicking between tasks, starting stuff and not finishing, fidgeting, interrupting conversations or just totally losing focus on the conversation and starting to do something else. Like another poster mentioned, I'm all or nothing in terms of tidying/house work. I'm also quite anxious but I'm not sure if this is related.

Magikarpet sounds like several issues which would be best worked on separately perhaps? I think with ADHD there can sometimes be a tendency to roll everything into one and then feel anxious about it but it's possible to separate things out as well.

Have you seen the Stately Homes threads on Relationships? Perhaps it isn't at that level but it might help.

Ditsy I often felt anxious before my diagnosis but now my therapist says this isn't anxiety at all. I think it's definitely worth seeking diagnosis if you suspect.