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Original poster

Not sure I am very well

121 replies

messyoldmess · 30/12/2006 22:43

Some of you may know about my drama with H & my separation etc. I have always felt I was dealing with things ok, but over the last couple of days I have totally lost the plot!
I don't feel I am control of my own head & feel the pressure is too great. I have experienced several panic attacks, tears & now just feel my head is really going to explode & I need to scream or something!
I know this may sound dramatic, but it is truly how I feel. I am scared I am going a bit mad.

OP posts:
Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 09:21

Barely slept at all again. Don't feel at all with it today. I was doing ok on the coping front, but over the last few days I have suddenly flipped a bit & it is scaring me.

OP posts:
EniDeepMidwinter · 31/12/2006 09:23

sounds like massive stress trying to leave your system

please try not to worry

how about going to bed today?

sleep deprivation can do this to you, believe me I know. Would a couple of days of sleeping pills help maybe?

BeetrootsResolution · 31/12/2006 09:26

yes it does sound like stress rather than depression. I guess you need to try and calm down, do some deep breathing and perhaps some visualisatins if you can

Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 09:26

If someone's around to take care of the boys I will try & sleep sometime today. I know the lack of sleep doesn't help matters, but even though I'm so tired, I just lay there tossing & turning all night.

OP posts:
Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 09:29

I've tried herbal sleeping tablets, but they don't help at all.

OP posts:
EniDeepMidwinter · 31/12/2006 10:18

thats cos they are crap

take some vitamins though - magnesium and vitamin b are brilliant at supporting your body when you are stressed. Obviously these will not work immediately.

DO NOT WORRY. you are not going mad. You are suffering from stress and lack of sleep. The stress is stopping you sleeping. First of all, give up alcohol if you are drinking - it really fecks up your sleeping patterns. Go to bed early with a good book and a milky drink. Admit to yoursef that you probably will wake in the night, in which case, get up and go and watch telly, or read a book, or get a pencil and paper and write down all your mad, garbled,sterssed thoughts. Tell yourself that if you are laying down and conceiously trying to relax your body that at least your poor old body is having a rest. You will cope, especially if you can grab a few hours sleep in the day.

EniDeepMidwinter · 31/12/2006 10:18

can you get out of the house for a walk? (today not in the middle of the night )

mrspoppins · 31/12/2006 10:20

Anxiety and depression are very closely linked so to be honest, if I were you now, I would be heading off to my on call GPs today for a chat.

re sleeping today...remember it can start a cycle of not sleeping at night if you doze in the daytime...a vicious circle I know.

Some herbal remedies suit some and not others. Nytol worked great for me but didn't help a friend of mine at all so truly, you need to be discussing this with your GP

You are feeling out of control now but you are still able at the moment to keep that stable. I'm not saying that this will happen, not at all, but you could find that you can no longer keep it together at all, not even to post on here for help or to ring a friend. Depression or anxiety states can deteriorate so quickly you don't realise it at all.I used to be a nurse so these words are from a medical viewpoint.

Please at least have a chat with a GP over a phone today.
xxKaren

EniDeepMidwinter · 31/12/2006 10:21

"re sleeping today...remember it can start a cycle of not sleeping at night if you doze in the daytime...a vicious circle I know.
"

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

DONT LISTEN! (sorry mrs poppins)

mrspoppins · 31/12/2006 10:28

Resting today would be better than sleeping.
If you sleep during the day when you are really exhausted, you will not be able to sleep as well that night.

Resting though is great as are catnaps, just not full sleeps.

Mind you, for the time being, does it really matter if m.o.m. is sleeping during the day and not at night...not at all...as long as some rest is happening.

As a long tern rule though, not a habit you'd want to get into.

That's all I meant. Really and truly though anybody feeling this way should simply be going to a professonal. They are always there to see people in this situation and want to help.
xxK

Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 10:30

Thanks for the tips! Would never have thought of buying vitamins to help, but will go to the health shop & get some.
I have tried Kalms, but they don't seem to be touching the sides tbh!
Agree that alcohol does tend to make me sleep worse, but have had a few drinks to try & chill me in the evening, which is bad.
Will make another GP appt for next week.

OP posts:
mrspoppins · 31/12/2006 10:34

All the best to you. Wishing you completion and resolution of all your difficulties in the coming year.

Much love to you.xxxxKaren

Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 10:43

Thank you.
I did see my GP a few weeks back, but at the time I was adament I was not depressed, just very stressed, & I didn't want to go down the AD road if possible.
He has put me down for counselling, but there's a waiting list.
Things seem to have got quite a bit worse over the last week though, so I think I should maybe go back to the doctors & admit defeat!

OP posts:
QuootiepieTheNewYearsAss · 31/12/2006 12:01

It isn't admiting defeat! Just get something to get you through, until your body has caught back up with itself! You might only need sleeping tablets, or whatever a few days/week or so. You rung GP yet? xXx

mrspoppins · 31/12/2006 12:05

To be defeated is to have lost...

To admit there is something wrong and seek help is to win your life back.
xx

Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 12:06

No, I will ring them tomorrow. I'll be ok today, I think. I am just feeling unbearably tired atm.
I was in such a bad way yesterday, that apparantly even my dad asked after me this morning, & he is very anti the whole separation!

OP posts:
Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 12:08

Yes, I guess you're right - I just like to feel I can cope, but right now I'm struggling as my head is kind of bursting!

OP posts:
Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 12:09

My dad also does not believe in depression!

OP posts:
mellowma · 31/12/2006 12:12

Message withdrawn

mellowma · 31/12/2006 12:13

Message withdrawn

Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 12:16

That's exactually what mine says!! "No such condition, total nonsence! It is called feeling a bit sad & you should just pull your socks up & get on with things!"

OP posts:
QuootiepieTheNewYearsAss · 31/12/2006 12:17

my mum is the same! So I stopped telling her... Make sure you do ring GP, ok? And if you're really bad, don't hesitate to ring the out of hours one xXx

Original poster
messyoldmess · 31/12/2006 12:18

I will do, I promise!

OP posts:
mellowma · 31/12/2006 12:19

Message withdrawn

QuootiepieTheNewYearsAss · 31/12/2006 12:22

you're not a weak character. At all. I can't explain why some people "cope" better than others... im blaming my body Besides, maybe, just maybe you're under more stress than they ever have been? xXx