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Original poster

I dont want to do this anymore

31 replies

eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 12:52

I thought about changing my name but honestly cant be bothered. I have a 9 week old baby with colic and I can not cope with him anymore. I love him more than ANYTHING. But he will not stop crying and he wont sleep anywhere but in my arms. I am exhausted and depressed. I had a miserable pregnancy a miserable birth and now a miserable baby. When will it get better?

I have finally left him on his own just to write this because I need help. I am strongly against leaving him to cry, he is only moaning at the moment. I want to be there for him I know he is sufferring but I cant stand him anymore. Please cheer me up and give me some hope. I do love him so much I just cant cope with him anymore. Tried calling crysis and an old man answered the phone so I hung up. I have no family in this country. Few friends and those I have I dont want to burden. I cant reach my husband on his mobile so I am really alone right now.

OP posts:
Original poster
eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 12:53

bump

sorry i need help

OP posts:
AnAngelWithin · 10/10/2006 12:53

oh you poor thing. I can symathise. are you breast or bottle feeding?

Original poster
eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 12:54

breast but he has 2 bottles overnight so I Can get some sleep.

OP posts:
WigWamBam · 10/10/2006 12:55

Please try Crysis again, and talk to them.

Call your HV, tell her how you feel, and ask her to come and see you for a chat.

It will get better, I promise you - the first few weeks are awful but it will get better.

AnAngelWithin · 10/10/2006 12:55

try changing the bottles to either the tommee tippes ones of the dr browns ones with the tubes in. have you got one of those battery operatedbaby swings? i take it you have tried infacol? what about colief? when is he at his worst or is he just generally miserable all the time?

Beauregard · 10/10/2006 12:55

Hi eeny ,
No wonder you feel so crappy .
Call your health visitor and ask her to come out to you.
Do you have any friends nearby that could help out just to give you a rest?

yeahinaminute · 10/10/2006 12:55

Oh eeny I'm so sorry for you
If it's any help DD was "colicky" from about the 4th week til about the 12th week then all of a sudden it stopped !!

AnAngelWithin · 10/10/2006 12:56

agree about trying crysis and you HV.

Beauregard · 10/10/2006 12:56

Surely if they are real friends then they wouldn't mind helping?

Original poster
eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 13:00

i dont want to talk to a man about this. I dont know why I just dont. but i will try crysis and see if a lady answers this time.

i tried calling my best friend but she is in a different time zone and its the very early morning there. I guess she is asleep. I only have one good friend here and I lean on her for so much I just dont want to make a pain out of myself.

I've tried everything for his colic. And he is on 4 different medicines now. He is just a miserable baby. He smiled at me this morning which was lovely but it doesnt last at all.

OP posts:
ProfessorGrammaticus · 10/10/2006 13:04

It will get better. Can you bundle him into the pram and go out for a walk?

Imascaryfairy · 10/10/2006 13:05

Poor you - is it any consolation to know that it will get better. I know that the incessant crying is horrible - I used to resort to putting the baby in the pram and just walking walking walking - the crying sounds less when you're outdoors. I found Colief was good.
Also, as far as the sleeping goes, would he sleep in a sling? That way he'd know you were closeby, but at least it might be less burdensome.
Big hugs to you, and hope you get some relief.

PinkTulips · 10/10/2006 13:16

{{{{{hugs}}}}} eeny, you're doing the best you can and it is 100% normal to feel like this with a needy baby. it doesn't make you a bad mom, it makes you human.

you're not leaving him to cry pet, you're getting a tired and stressed mommy out of a situation that is pushing her over the edge.

i've told you before and i'll tell you again, when you have a baby with colic sometimes you just have to leave the room and get a few minutes to breathe in order to be able to cope. it's normal and it s far healthier than staying and risking losing it with the baby.

have you bought a sling yet? do try it as it means he can be close to you without preventing you from being able to do anything else.

and eeny........ IT DOES END! i promise

UlySCREAMS · 10/10/2006 13:21

poor you, been there with ds1 and thought I'd tire of tiredness

Don't want to sound flimsy as I know how serious you're feeling but cranial osteopathy is fantastic for babies with colic. I've heard so many positive word of mouth stories. Just a thought?

What was the labour like btw?

UlySCREAMS · 10/10/2006 13:22

meant die of tiredness

divastrop · 10/10/2006 14:32

are there any courses in baby massasge where u live?ds2 had colic and massage helped so much.i also found i had to experiment with different bottles/teats/formula etc till i got it right.
dont feel guilty about leaving him to cry for a while,it wont hurt him.

Mumpbump · 10/10/2006 14:46

Our ds used to cry quite a bit (without colic), so I used to carry him around in a Karri-me sling - soft one that kept him nice and cosy. I did also take him to a cranial osteopath which seemed to help... Apparently, it can be particularly helpful if the baby has been traumatised during the birth...

If it's any consolation, most of my antenatal group had days where all they did was cry and none of our babies had colic, so you are not alone...

Original poster
eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 17:57

thanks all for your support.

i am borrowing a swing from a friend tonight and I hope that will help, and give me somewhere to put him that he will be happy with so I dont have to hold him all the time. We have a carrier but I dont know how to strap it on [embarassed!] so havent used it yet. We tried cranial osteopathy once and I couldnt afford any more sessions, and we are doing baby massage but he just screams the whole time.

After this morning which was dire he has been a little angel, he must have sensed I was at breaking point and decided to go easy on me for a few hours!

UlyScreams - the labour was AWFUL. He was 4 weeks premature and loads and loads of stuff went wrong in the labour and his first week.

I am still pretty raw with some of it and am thinking of making a complaint to the hospital on a few issues.

OP posts:
alexsCURSEDMUMMY · 10/10/2006 18:02

eenywifemum-where in the country are you?

Original poster
eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 18:09

in Essex - and my son's name is Alex!

OP posts:
podglet · 10/10/2006 18:13

Hi Eeny, sorry to hear you are having a rough time. Have you tried a Wilkinet sling? they are easy to do up and DS would be able to snuggle up to you and you would still have you hands free

just wanted to offer my support and send you a hug. You are not to far away so I can come over to you if you wanted...

podglet · 10/10/2006 18:13

Hi Eeny, sorry to hear you are having a rough time. Have you tried a Wilkinet sling? they are easy to do up and DS would be able to snuggle up to you and you would still have you hands free

just wanted to offer my support and send you a hug. You are not to far away so I can come over to you if you wanted...

olivo · 10/10/2006 18:13

eeny - sorry to hear you are feeling this bad. i can't really offer you any advice but please make sure you talk to someone professional. also, i am sure that your friend would rather hear from you thsn find out later that yo needed her/ him and didnt want to bother them.thats what friends are for.
good luck and you know where we are if you need to talk. x

Original poster
eenywifemum · 10/10/2006 18:18

In the end my friend phoned me while I was sobbing and she raced over so I have been with her all afternoon and feel much better now.

Podglet where are you again? I know you are near me...

I have an appointment to see a Dr about PND on the 19th, I am hoping to go on some antidepressants to help me out a little, much as I hate the idea of it.

OP posts:
alexsCURSEDMUMMY · 10/10/2006 18:18

oh thats a shame-i'd have come round and taken a turn but i'm atbopposite end of country.if he's called alex he'll be fab when he's older!!

when the screaming gets too much-take him outside. it def sounds quieter outside!! and if you are in public you can't hurt him.
phone your hv and get her to come round.
phone any friends you can think of. has dh got family in this country? could any of them help? could your mum come for a visit?

it does get better i promise.