community-based psychiatric adventures of the mentally normal

[Mitchy1nge]

am not sure if mavis is still in this one

good luck enpo, how has today been so far? x

Had a migraine - I know why; it's because I started smoking again. Have stopped now. Bloody cigarettes. I don't think they do one a bit of good, you know.

Then I had some visitors (DP and Mavis, who turns out to know personally at least three people she happened to see on the ward) and, since they didn't have dinner plans and the dinner on the ward looked grim, we went out for a curry. Lamb tikka masala, chicken jalfrezi, pistachio chicken korma. Hoobloodyray.

How about you Mitch?

Yum that sounds so much better than hospital food! Is Indian food your favourite?

sorry to hear about migraine, do they happen often? have them so infrequently I don't know what triggers them and last time a dr gave me naproxen instead of the usual Magic Injection and it took ages to go :(

am driving everyone mad by wailing about my abdominal crisis/back pain while refusing to let anyone investigate - conveniently can't feel it when I'm running so have managed a 3 mile run and a 4 mile run but for the whole of the rest of the time I am being an invalid

I love all food Indian is great tho

Abdo/back thing sounds foul. And a bit weird. Has it been going on for long?

I get migraines a lot less now my blood sugar is controlled, funnily enough. But they always seem to happen when I know I can't get hold of medication - the doctors here refused to write me up for anything better than paracetamol until I was actually in the throes of the thing

only a couple of days, since Saturday night, pancreatitis can cause this sort of pain and is not unheard of in people with my sort of eating habits but I think it is going away now so will stop banging on about it. Really think I have some kind of demi- Munchausen type factitious disorder which stops short at the point of enjoying any medical attention.

Are you all set for home?

Yeah hoping to go home tomorrow if I can convince that all is well.

Hope it's not pancreatitis.

Glad to hear you're homeward bound Enpo.

Thanks.

did you get out for another curry or was it hospital food for (hopefully) last time?

More hospital food. DP visited. Don't know why. How are you Mitch?

my pancreas hasn't killed me yet (wonder how it would feel about producing enzymes capable of digesting hospital food? am going to see how it feels about The Omelette)

are you home already? have been thinking of you quite a lot, is not an enviable process - picking up the pieces etc xxx

Thanks for thinking of me Mitch. Am out, and home. Didn't eat in hospital today and have now had a packet of chicken, two slices of rye bread with soft cheese, and nearly a pint of sugar free jelly with squirty cream

Good luck with The Omelette. What's going in it today?

God only knows what my blood sugar is doing now.

that all sounds very tasty

I made a beef, bean and cheese burrito out of last night's chili (tried to forget that it was left uncovered overnight for cats to lick at) after my run but if I had any sense I would also make a spinach and feta omelette with some cherry tomatoes and peppers a bit later this evening. I wouldn't just go to bed. That would be silly.

what are you up to tonight?

Ah that burrito sounds lovely. I would imagine you're pretty full after that though. But then, it's not nearly dinnertime yet, whatever the NHS might think.

Tonight I will be trying to pretend I don't have a possibly-lethal stash of drugs in my first aid box watching any TV programme I can find that isn't a talent show, a soap opera, or Jeremy Kyle, followed by sleeping in a warm, non-plastic-coated bed with a duvet rather than elderly sheets and blankets. I think I have to go shopping, too. The only food left in the house is twenty expired eggs and a boursin, which doesn't inspire.

Do you still have the pain, Mitch?

PLEASE GIVE THE STASH TO SOMEONE FOR SAFEKEEPING OUT OF THE HOUSE!

Can you test the eggs in water? I eat them unless they float right to the very top. People always give me eggs but they never have dates on.

(I did a 10 mile run at a reasonable pace so in theory need to eat back at least 800 calories plus my usual daily amount which can be daunting in itself. But yeah, my pancreas/kidney whatever it is still hurts, though not as bad, and is making me tired but lying down doesn't help anyway.)

Ouch I am fine and don't need to give my drugs to anyone. I had an equally easy and much more reliably lethal method available to me in hospital which I managed to ignore so this should't be too bad.

I will definitely be testing the eggs - I also happily eat elderly and undated eggs Just wary because I can't remember if aged eggs are contraindicated with the MAOI. Most MAOI diet plans are overly restrictive anyway. The only thing that ever set me off before was a pasta sauce with hidden red wine.

Sorry to hear the pain is still bad. Kidney pain sounds like a possibility. I know they usually say back, but I felt mostly abdo pain and nausea with my kidney infections. I wonder if the pain going away when you're running is diagnostic of anything.

I think it's just that everything else hurts more when I'm running so it's eclipsed! Today I was doing an important Run On Main Roads Entirely By Myself (with nothing but a hi-viz 'CAUTION Young Horse' tabard to protect me) and my panic about being run over was all I could feel until the last two miles where there was PAVEMENT. Yay.

Is this MAOI the med you wanted to be on earlier?

CAUTION Young Horse

I hate walking/running on roads without pavements - so many people assume you will just leap into the enormous ditch full of hawthorn and foxshit to make room for their racing line. I've noticed people very much take their lead from what the car in front does, too.

Yes, the MAOI is phenelzine which is what has worked for me before, though the doctor was very reluctant and wouldn't even discuss the possibility of trying tranylcypromine, which I believe may be a better fit for me (fewer side effects, less weight gain, more stimulating, presumably doesn't need to be in the sodding fridge). I'll try and convince the community psych - apparently they want me to see the consultant now rather than the doctor I was seeing before who is apparently only on a short placement.

Could it be bowel spasms? I've had those as part of IBS and they were very painful.

sounds v promising about the tranylcypromine and seeing an actual consultant - bit of experience shouldn't hurt - will keep fingers crossed

still want to know what is for supper out of all those eggs and Boursin, mentally normal masterchef, am still not really feeling The Omelette

I definitely wouldn't be able to switch to tranylcypromine yet, even if I could find a psychiatrist who would prescribe it - it's a two-week wash-out between MAOIs anyway IIRC, and it'll be a few months until I know whether the phenelzine has worked. Of course, if it doesn't work, my case for trying another MAOI isn't strong. If it does work, it'll be almost impossible to convince them if I feel the need to switch. A friend was kept on phenytoin for years despite it making all her teeth crumble to nothing, simply because doctors are scared to switch people off something that works even when the side effects are intolerable.

There might be some chilli in the freezer.

Also I hope the community consultant is happy with a steeper titration than the hospital consultant - she seemed a bit nervy about a rapid increase.

Careful of pavements tho - it's one of those that claimed my ankle

Hey Enpo, nice to see you home. I'm glad to hear you got the Phenelzine you were looking for. Seeing the consultant will also be a good thing.

Maybe… I'm not sure if seeing the consultant is necessary, really. So many psychiatrists! I'm sure the other doctor would be fine but if he's not happy to keep seeing me then I guess it's not just up to me.

Tasty, geranium-scented phenelzine