Having a shit day :( argggh - my bloody mother called at 8am to tell me she had been up all night in pain with ther back, but woe is her she has to take the dog out - err, not at 8am i tell her - but he holds himself apparently 
So i go round straight after the school run, tell her to take some of the pain killers they have given her - no! get her her other tablets - she throws them across the floor 
screaming at me about how the doctor is trying to reduce her meds - there was a letter, i read it, not the case. took the dog out, left her to it - then come home and get stressed because DP not started work yet, although he had done admin, i didnt know - cue massive row because i feel out of control, told him that i can't stand other people causing me stress and had enough, etc, he was nasty back because he was stressed over something techy. Horrible row - but we made up and we worked through the stressy bit, made him call the company rather than scratching his head for an hour - all cleared up Its not rocket science - if you don't understand something, ask!
pfa stuff pissing me off - but keeping me sane at same time - just worked through some admin for that, and then got in contact with a guy i used to work with (indirectly) years back when i was doing my phd. I didn't think he would remember me but he contacted me and said "how could i forget you!" and it made me :) and :( at the same time. It just reminded me that i used to be a larger than life person who pretty much made my presence felt all over the place - i don't recognise myself anymore - now im scared of my own fucking shadow :( How on earth did i get like this? maybe that person before wasn't real - fuck, i dont feel like I am real - i get this thing sometime when i am surprised when people who i see every day recognise me, its like i feel non-descript, does anyone else get that?
CIQ i totally get what you are saying about being self employed - i do think i would struggle being employed, as it were, i think i found this at the college where there were line managers etc and i was never quite sure if i was doing right for doing wrong - when you are your own boss, the buck stops with you but you have the confidence to know that you are doing what needs done - if that makes sense? I think it is good that you are getting twitchy and feeling the need to do something, i know your DH has his business but is there something you could do separately? I would love to work from home, maybe i'll look into that but you have your artistic talents, could you ask local cafe's etc to display your work and then people can ask to buy it, the cafe get free art for their walls and a small % of the sale and you get your stuff "out there" or you could take commissions? might be worth a try? We paid quite a bit of money for an oil painting of MILs dog once, it was really lovely, is that something you would consider? working from photos? You could advertise on facebook, in dog magazines?