roll up for the village fete! move to our village if your 'fete' is to be happy!

[ThatVikRinA22]

6th thread folks....

keep talking/posting.

oh - and we are getting a puppy.

You must be psychic vicar, I did write stuff down earlier. I'm hoping art therapy will help with expression. Please don't feel bad, hugs.

Good luck with the surgery, it can't be nice waiting.

I'm glad work is going so much better, you can do it!

Hi all and special (((hugs))) for snowy

Back home and glad about it.

evening all,

feeling so much at ease now that me & DD are at my brothers! hoping she will fall asleep without a glitch as she is not very good with new places.

vicar good luck with surgery & glad work is going well :)

ed half the battle is getting out of bed in the morning the as the meds do make u tired :)

colouring glad u had a nice time & r now home :)

big hugs to all x

Im in counselling to restore my self esteem but im kidding myself trying to feel ok about bring sahm. Doing ok until dp made a comment today about jow more women should work and have high power jobs. What about childcare I say get a childminder I always had a suspicion that dp wanted me to be more than I am and this comment has confirmed it really he is slwsys going on about the brilliant jobs clients wives have and ive always felt an undercurrent of him being a bit awestruck and dismissed it. I used to be a strong woman but now im not im making him unhappy

LEM I don't think he meant it that way? You are being over sensitive because of your low self-esteem FWIW I think a high-power job must be over-rated in many ways - for one thing, I am so glad I got to see every appearance by DC in school stuff.

How about thinking of running the house etc as a high-powered job? In many ways it is! I always aimed at my house being like a country house hotel (lol!) not that I ever succeeded, but it gave me something to aim at.

(In later years I developed this theory into having a hotel when I (and the people in it) were in one of two modes: guest or worker. Hence when I had a bath I'd be a guest, and drop my stuff on the floor for the chamber maid to clear up. Later, in my incarnation as chamber maid, I'd clear up! Thought of this too late to suggest it to my family anyway they'd have thought I was barking

LEM - I use to do a high-power job & trust me it's not all that. u work stupid hours & still get paid the same as everyone else, have no social life & definitely would not be able to do anything motherly with ur kid's. all u get is seepless nights and loads of stress.

I much prefer being a SAHM (not really had a choice) but now I wouldn't change it for the world. silvery is right everything we do at home is no less then being in a high powered job so be proud of urself :)

silvery u made me smile reading about ur little game :) hope ur well :)

Liking the game too silvery x

Hello, I'll run the tombolla if you like. Life's a game of chance innit

Can I come join the party as I know I am anxious at the mo as can't even focus to read a magazine. People who earn a lot of money (and that's usually what being high-powered means) are equally susceptible to mental frailness and all the shit that life throws at us but they generally see their homes and familes less. At my work 2 people this week have gone off sick with stress related illness and I know a lot of my anxieties come from work and I'm not even high powered Being a sahm is a dream job when you're stuck on the blardy Northern line and your dh should think before he opens his gob

Think before he opens his gob?? ahahahahaahahaha!! I did however send him a text informing him of his mishap and i am up one bottle of wine and a bar of green and blacks chocolate :)

Welcome to the thread - I'll buy some tickets - so long as there are decent bottles of wine and nothing that will rot my insides.

Hi all

LEM I sympathise - its hard going from being at work to being sahm. Are you able to find an at home project that you'd enjoy doing and make the cleaning/cooking stuff more interesting?

silvery game

OK this is going to sound really basic but I'd appreciate some advice.

DD first thing dd said to me when I picked her up from school was "my friends said my ears were really big" and it had upset her.

How would you reply?

I'm realising I never really confided anything like that to my mum when I was little so seem to be lacking in resources...

Ooops forgot to say hi to awks hope you find some techniques to calm your mind and anxiety.

I think silvery is right - was just having a self pitying moment and pandering to my own self esteem issues. Am coming to terms with enjoying being at home. I do have my eye on the hallway which has not been decorated since we moved in 16 years ago

i don't know what to say about your DD CiQ, you don't want it to be a major issue for her - i think i would just tell her she is beautiful and that her friends are being silly. If they say anything else to her then talk to the school but at this stage i would leave it and hope it was a thoughtless comment and they wont say anything else, if they do, talk to the school. Sorry, not very clear, have had

Thanks lem I said (cos she looked sad) did it make you feel sad, and the whole thing about friends being silly. Then yest eve was thinking more along your lines - you look lovely. I think its cos she told so-called "friend" at school about lovely weekend away with "best friend" so put school friend's back up. Absolutely don't want to make this a big issue (tho her ears do stick out ) so hope can leave it at that...

Do the hallway!!! B&Q/Wickes paint not expensive. I have finished bedroom and yet a lot of pleasure going in and looking around at my handiwork . Once have made curtains and sorted ds storage out, am going to tackle bathroom!!!

take care all x

Things are pretty much the same for me, been thinking of you all. I have a goal to ring the CT tonight It's something I find very difficult to do.

Hugs to all.

My dd gets teased for having a big forehead and she actually doesn't but that's beside the point and the thing that helps her is having a stock of smart alec responses and practicing being nonchalent even if she is hurting.

Over the years, it has worked and now she really does brush it off but when younger it really dented her confidence.

And yes, do the hall Boyes have nice paint at £5 a tin

Thanks awks that's really helpful feel free to share smart alec responses too!

Hi snowy good to hear from you. Any way you can incentivise yourself to get that call done? Hang in there.

Come on lem I love a bit of interior décor, what colours do you like?

Hello everyone else too, hope your weeks going OK.

ciq just tell her that sometimes other children say silly things that are not true, and show her that her ears are perfectly normal (or in fact better than normal!)

my dd gets called spaghetti legs - she is 5ft 8 and stick thin - its pure jealousy on the part of those calling her it because they would kill for her legs (she has legs like a giraffe - her dad is 6ft 5 and all legs....she takes after him!)

she got really down about it at one point until i just pointed out how beautiful she is and that other people pick fault with something they feel envious of.

DS got bugs bunny on account of his 2 front teeth - his front teeth were actually normal but the teeth next to them were undersized which made his front teeth look big - he got them fixed on the NHS and now has a lovely set of pearly whites courtesy of the NHS!....

tell her to rise above it and that often when people poke fun its because they are envious - girls can be quite spiteful. tell her that.

hope everyone else is doing ok.

thanks a lot vicar that's so helpful . Girls can be lovely can't they! Your DD sounds stunning!

Hope your week's going ok.

Fog-bound here and splitting headache since yest eve which I 'm beginning to wonder is hormonal, but spirits OK

evening all,

firstly welcome to awks every1 is lovely here & really helpful :)

waves at LEM, vicar, snowy, colouring, silvery, ed & any1 I've missed.

CIQ - I was bullied at school for having bugs bunny teeth so can totally sympathise with the bullying stories :( & yes girls can be right b***s but like others said just tell ur DD how beautiful she is & to rise above it. can be hard at first but once her confidence builds she will never find any comments bothersome. I was lucky to have great friends so the bullying did not effect me at all.

LEM - decorating the hallways sounds fantastic I love a painting the house it's such a great way to de-stress & keep ur mind occupied.

Vicar- ur DD sounds stunning. Hope ur doing well :)

I'm having a bit of weird day. been fine all morning then all of a sudden this evening I'm feeling really anxious & well the hallucinations (I know there not real) are troubling me :(

hope every1 has a good evening & gets a good night sleep :) I know I'm gonna have a long night :(

I desperately need some sleep Apparently I'm on a knife edge as far as sectioning goes.

Hi dumdum and snowy

snowy sounds rubbish. Really sorry to hear you're so poorly at the mo. Do you have any techniques and/or drugs to help you sleep that you haven't already tried? Just in case it helps, I combine hot milk before bed, lavender oil and then a relaxation technique where you systematically tense each part of your body and relax - eg tense toes, and relax x 5, tense feet and relax x 5 etc. Failing that sleeping tablets?!

dumdum great to hear you had a good morning. Could it be tiredness now - I sometimes feel worse in the eve if I've had a busy-ish day (and end up reverting to sugar and alcohol )

Take care x

hey colouring it could be tiredness making my mind go mumbo jumbo like u I hit the sugary stuff but recently have wanted to start drinking again (been dry for 10 years now) been having really strong urges

snowy have they given u any sleeping tablets to help u sleep? I know their not keen on it as they r addictive. mine give me 14 tablets per month which I use very sensibly & only on nights when I'm really bad but it helps me to know I have them as back up. I'll b around as much as I can this evening if u need to chat :) same goes for you colouring & any1 else that wants to join in.

Lavender oil is good My meds knock me out, but don't make me stay asleep iyswim.

Just rang CT, not helpful, their response was 'that's not a very sensible thing to do', as if I didn't know that.

I'm going to go and curl up in bed.

Good luck and good sleep all.

good luck snowy

dumdum have you seen the brave babes battle bus or a similar titled thread which is supposed to be really good for supporting people cutting down/out alcohol? Those urges can be powerful. I'm sure I read somewhere you should drink a pint of something non alcoholic and then distract yourself, but I know easier said than done. Take it easy.