Not Driving Away!

[Pumble]

P1 splashing in the paddling pool and P2 having a nap. So pleased to be back and they are so pleased to be with each other again.

Can't believe we got to 1000 posts! You need to change your nn now too don't you wylye ?!

Waving back!

Sorry, I've been in meetings two evenings this week, and out Friday and Saturday! Most unusual.

I have not hauled myself to Zumba yet and not started Pilates as it may clash with swimming lessons for me! Bit rubbish really.

Pumble, you ok?

Waves!

Thanks for waving magi. It means I have found you again!

I must improve my understanding of how to work mumsnet - perhaps then I wouldn't lose you!!

Hope all good. Impressed and a little jealous of your swimming (and the men's hockey team!). Ridiculously I run past a rugby club and yet never see any rugby players-must timetable my runs better! Running has definitely even my lifeline -that time out helps so much. Up to 11 miles now.

Things are up and dwin but going through a bad down time. Not helped by mr p disappearing around the world at short notice - thankfully he's home now. Because i did my cbt as part of a trial it means that my cbt man is still on the phone/email and so have had a couple of phone calls which has helped I think.

The plumblettes are growing too fast! P1 has just had her birthday and got her first bike-taking to cycling like a duck to water! She suggested she could cycle with me whilst i run(I didn't like to tell her that that was my time out!!). Just like her sister P2 has come up with her own sung language to communicate with us-who needs words?!

Just wanted to say hi

What you need to do is click on the "Watch this thread" button at the bottom of the last post on the thread.

When you want to find it again - just click on I'm watching at the top of any page & you'll find us!

You may be impressed by my swimming but I am stunned by your running. So pleased you have got back into that.

Glad you have got your cbt man for help - am assuming you are not on any meds?

Just love the idea of the sung language - they'll be stars yet!

Hi!

Lovely to hear from you. 11miles gains much respect. Sorry you are going through a bad time. Hopefully it won't last long and you can use some of the techniques CBT has taught you.

Come tell us what else you have been up to.

I STILL haven't zumba'd or ran, or anything. Shame on me. I have been getting more involved in the PA and various committees so I feel busy, and that i've got a few things to juggle. It's quite novel to feel like that again.

It must be nice in a strange way to gave things to juggle again row!

I am doing my first recording for ages this coming week - I'm utterly terrified! Three days with people I don't really know, three days where I will hardly see the pumblettes (and having to miss a bedtime which will be interesting as p2 still has a bf at bedtime...) but something I couldn't turn down and need to do! It's scary to do something totally as me though and not as 'mother to pumblettes'! I need to check out the music but when I try p1 either says 'don't sing mummy' or joins in...

What else have I been up to? Hmmmm. Lots of running! Have also discovered I can take both pumblettes swimming at once which is great and p2 loves it so much which is good as she has barely been!

P1 asked for a jumper for her birthday but that had to be put on hold as I slammed my finger in the hinge of am old Victorian door-what a muppet!

What's all your news?

Wow, how exciting to be singing and recording! I too woud be terrified, but i think i would feel fabulous once I did it! Problem is, although I like singing, and think I can, in truth, I wonder if I actually sign terribly out of tune....

Hope your finger gets better soon, if it is swollen, keep it high as much as you can to speed the swelling going down. Just rest you hand on your shoulder when you're sitting down.

My news? I've joined a PA, I like organising though, it has been the essence of a lot of jobs I've had, so it shouldn't be too bad. I'm in school when my youngest is in pre school to get some experince and make sure that working in schools is what I want to do when I go back to school. I LOVE it. Love working with the children and helping them learn and progress, love feeling part of a team again, love the atmosphere in the school. When DD2 is in school full time, I can see this as my career. The girls who are growing fast. We are camping at Easter, for the first time ever, Wish us luck!

I just hope the waether is kind to you, row.

My camping days are over - enjoyed it (ish) when I did it but happy not to do it again. Back & hip too dicky for sleeping on hard ground.

Where are you going?

Pumble - I am in awe of you singing & recording! I am the most unmusical person I know - can't read a note, never played an instrument, think I am pretty tone deaf but I love to sing.

When I have the house to myself I belt out the numbers!

What do you sing? Would you like to come & give me lessons?

So pleased you're enjoying being in a school environment. How exciting! Lots to look forward to then row?

I would love any camping tips-it's never been my thing but we have been invited camping thus summer with old university friends and in the spirit of trying to do more things think we might say yes....!

My mum thinks 11miles isn't that far to run... Although this someone who gas never run herself!

Always available for singing lessons magi!! Mostly sing classical but this recording is jazz inspired. Still can't get my head around being away from the pumblettes so much but it will be fine. Concert tomo too so lots of singing days ahead.

What are your weekend plans?

PS forgot to say I spoke to my cbt man today which was interesting. Lots to ponder. How to stop being so black and white-grey has never been easy for me to find!

Oh, Pumble - I used to be so black & white & have now accepted grey -with colour running through it from time to time.

Just hold on to the good times, even if they are just moments, & let them bring some colour to your grey. Life is very ordinary with some great times in between - hold on to them.

This weekend I will be mostly trying to find a cheap flight to Turkey for the end of May/early June & cleaning the house!

Now DH & I are retired we tend to do all the boring stuff at w/e & leave the weekdays free for going out.

So, the inside of all the windows need cleaning & bed changing & utterly amazing stuff like that.

11 miles is A M A Z I N G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your mum comes from a different planet!!

Camping tips? I'll tell you after Easter. The closest I've got to camping so far is Eurocamp with everything provided, so we will be on a steep learning curve! I will report back.

11 miles is seriously good running. Unless it takes you 8 hours to do it, I'm seriously impressed.

Magi as ever says the right thing.

DH is very black and white and gets frustrated with my more shifting sands approach to many things in life.. Spaghetti bolognese is a classic example, he thinks his way of cooking it is RIGHT and my way is WRONG. I think both of us cook a nice bolognese, both are right, but different from each other. We can both be right, it isn't a case of life being on a flip of a coin with one right side and one wrong. My coin is often still falling through the air, DH's is always sitting on the back of his hand, waiting to be uncovered to reveal heads or tails.

Weekend plans? Buying some camping equipment and digging in the garden. And catching up with piles of washing, heaps of dust and never ending trails of things not put away....

PS, I'm going to beautiful Cornwall. May head to the New Forest later in the year.

I could also do with singing tips. The jazz feel sounds like it will be great fun.

Magi, I've just looked back, waving, not drowning, is that in reference to a poem?

Can't remember my reference to 'waving not drowning@ - but it is a poem I know:

Not Waving but Drowning

Nobody heard him, the dead man,
But still he lay moaning:
I was much further out than you thought
And not waving but drowning.

Poor chap, he always loved larking
And now he's dead
It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,
They said.

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always
(Still the dead one lay moaning)
I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.

Stevie Smith

Sorry if that is too much of a downer for anyone. But it's still an amazing poem.

Does DH enjoy your spag bol, Row?

"We can both be right, it isn't a case of life being on a flip of a coin with one right side and one wrong. My coin is often still falling through the air, DH's is always sitting on the back of his hand, waiting to be uncovered to reveal heads or tails."

That is one of the best pieces of prose I've read for a long time - it sums up marriage so well.

Enjoy the w/e, all of you, even the battle with dust!

Magi, that is the poem the waving reminded me of. I like that it makes you think twice about what you see. It's not always what you think. Like when someone you know almost blanks you in the street and you wonder what you have done to upset them, and then you later learn they just had bad news and couldn't bear to stop and talk, or fantastic news and were completely wrapped up in their thoughts.

I got annoyed recently in a cafe as music came on, louder than normal background music, and it made it harder for me to hear. I was deep in conversation with a friend. My friend later recognised the couple at the next table, and discovered a marriage proposal had just take place, hence the music. I little bit of magic had happened under our noses, and I'm a little disappointed I was unaware of the moment. So much of life we don't see, or see with our own little goggles on.

Thank you for your compliment. Marriage is wondrous thing is it not! For your information, we both think our own recipe is the best, my DD's, using the term dear loosely, have second helpings of DH's. who am I to judge?

Soooooooo, how was the concert Pumble? how was your weekend?

Still mid recording but just saying hi! Will fill you in on life tomo

Hi!

Waves - most exciting, Pumble.

Really hope you are enjoying being yourself & not a Pumblette mum, if you see what I mean!

Hope you have both had the great sunshine we have had today. Great to be out in the warmth with the pumblettes. Hope all good with you.

Being pumble without the pumblettes I have to confess was fantastic! Don't get me wrong you know how much I love them but it was great to just be me! Three long days but great fun, v rewarding! Some good socialising too with a curry after one session. Really good to be out not discussing children! Pumblette 2 survived without me at bedtime but apparently was clearly missing that feed-she seemed pleased to have it back last night! I am hopeful it will all lead to more stuff-it was just so good and I was on such a high. I'm just so pleased I forced myself to do it! (Plus I think it was good to see what life's like when you have them all day for mr P!).

Loved the coin tossing analogy row-so true

It was also amazing to have hot cups of tea, breaks in the day and to go to the loo without toddlers!!! Everyone else said how exhausting it was but I said it was quite a break compared to normal. The composer who has thee children said he could totally see how it was a break!!

YAY!! Sounds great.

Never forget that you are a person as well as a mother & it is so important for your DCs to see you as a person as well. I know how much they need you, but having children is a long, slow process of letting them go.

As we have got a bit poetic here I'll quote my favourite poem about having children:

On Children
 Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

I hope that lots more recordings (& curries ) come your way, Pumble & that you enjoy life as you, just you, as well as being mother to those lovely Pumblettes!

Sounds fabulous Pumble. Really invigorating for the soul. Really pleased for you and I too hope there are more to come.

The poem is quite thought provoking, I'm going to read it a few more times as each read through reveals a little more (or I'm a little slow today!)

That is a fabulous poem magi - agree with row it needs multiple readings.

I know you're right about me needing to be me as well as the pumblettes mum and I'm so pleased I am beginning to realise it. I think that the recording is the best thing I have done in a long time.

Hope you're enjoying the sunshine.