Bipolar support thread?

[Crawling]

Ive noticed there are quite a few of us and thought maybe a thread for us would be good. All are welcome those diagnosed and those awaiting diagnosis.

Ill start with Ive been depressed so long now I dont remember how I used to feel, yet id still prefer this to mania as the havoc I reaked last time was very painful to clean up after my episode. If I had to chart my mood today between 1-10 1 being I cant think how to make a cup of tea and 5 being good 10 being the tv is talking to me and I must go out now im about a 3 today what about you guys?

Hi all, just a quick question, but what do you do when you feel like you are starting to feel manic? I have only recently been diagnosed but am feeling the mind whirring, anxiety building, all the usual feelings that seem to accompany my highs. I am not seeing my psychiatrist till next week, have mother in law coming on thursday (who doesn't know my recent diagnosis, previous issues, a whole other thread) and I am starting to panic. I have had no appetite today. Feel like I am having a bit of a sugar rush. Am a bit scared as I have been so well and it is a terrifying thought that things will all go wrong.

Hiya luckywinner call your cpn but you are unlikely to get a appointmemt in under a week. But if you had a few weeks to your appointment then the cpn may get your meds increased and a emergency appointment.

In your situation your cpn may get a med increase so when you see pychiatrist he can see if the meds are bringing you down or not.

I have been up since 5 even with the med increase im still going up as evidenced by last nights argument.

Ive been cleaning since 5am do you think im getting worse? Cpn coming today.

I woke up bright and early for once. I have reduced what I'm taking a bit and I feel like a spring that has been pushed down and suddenly released. Its nice not to feel dead.

Crawling - it may just be that you're having a bit of an up. Dry sunny weather can influence how you feel and the clocks have changed too. You're doing the right thing by keeping in touch with your CPN to make sure it doesn't go too far and hopefully you can have a mild period of being up without a horrible crash on the other side.

Look on the bright side - your house will be spotless .

Im more worried about the fact that I keep having recklace thoughts and im not entirely sure I should be driving right now

I have even tried to make a chance meeting with a ex so that maybe a affair would happen. Also really feel strong and feel a ururdge to get into fights.

They have already doubled my dose but im still going up.

Oh dear - so well past a mild period of being up. Heck. Glad your CPN is heading over later. Good job you're so on the ball at recognising it, so keep that positive in mind.

Is there anything practical you can to do release some of the energy? I walked for miles with music on last time I was manic just to do something that wasn't completely damaging.

part of the problem is going to be how long it takes for the anti-D's to get fully out of your system. Is there any way they could give you something like Lorazepam to calm you? My friend who has quite severe manias finds that helps to stop it.

I dont know they are talking about giving me the max dose and if that doesnt work giving me an additional med.

Luckily there is still a small voice of reason telling me dont do this its not worth it. I will tell cpn today what I have done before I lose that voice of reason completly.

I have doubled my exercize which is helping.

I hope they stop it before you lose the voice of reason as well. It sounds like you've been doing all of the right things, but you really need external imput now to keep it that way.

I hope things start to level out soon.

Oh Crawling I know exactly what you mean by reckless thoughts and exes. Am almost doing the same. Have started cleaning this am, but struggled to get out of bed. I am in the middle of fiddling with drug combinations so prob that. I think I will email psych's pa this morning citing mild emergency.

Hope your cpn does what you need, and properly listens. I find that is the most frustrating part. Will check back soon to see how you are.

Cpn says I need to give my meds a bit longer to kick in. But will monitor closely between now and then. She is also going to chace up my pych appointment.

Really hope they kick in soon. At least they're keeping an eye on you.

Thanks Babyheave she has also activated my paranoia by suggesting im too ill to look after the dc and maybe social services could help.

Sorry to hear a few of you are suffering at the moment.

As my diagnosis is only recent....but realise this is what i have had all along i just can't get over reading other posts and seeing so many similarities.....things i thought was just me and me being normal or things were part of my personality or just did sometimes and did not know why!
Beginning to wonder who the hell i am deep down.....it's scary.

As babyheave said Crawling Lorazapam, diazapam or clonazepam are really good just at bringing you down and chilling you out, they also help me when i have the awful anxiety and depression. Trouble is they are addictive.....Ive been on and off all 3 of these since last July..... had a constant supply of clonazepam since December i am worried about them stopping them as i rely on them now, it's catch 22.

I have a supply of tranqs, but only use them every so often. Juney, you need to see if they can offer you something else that can bring down the anxiety that isn't addictive. I have 25mg quetiapine for anxiety when I need it, which does the job and the lorazepam for when I start going up.

Talking about going up, I've been feeling much 'better' recently. I checked my credit card balance today and I've spent nearly 2k in 3 weeks. I need to get in touch with services I think, even though my care co is incommunicado.

Reading this thread has been very emotional for me. Wow. Probably not the best thing to do right before bed, although my meds will knock me out as always.

Like everyone else, so much resonates so loudly. My manic episodes scare the living Jesus out of me and the depressions are so debilitating.

I've been pretty stable (and fat!) for over 3 years now, on sodium valproate & quetiapine, with some emergency meds in the drawer that I have agreed DH can give me if I start to get manic (think it's haloperidol).

I'm going to go off and lurk for a while if everyone doesn't mind. Might NC when I come back. Reading all this and posting here makes it all feel very real and brings up a lot of memories I would maybe rather leave buried TBH most of the time I pretend I am 100% well and there is nothing wrong with me. Very few people in my current RL know of my diagnosis.

Sorry, I feel like a big wimp.

Welcome to the board heart trumps stick around there is wealths of support on here.

Down to 3 hours sleep here and today im going to ask for a loan for 10000 to get married yay. But my car keys have been removed I think they are being silly there is nothing wrong with my driving.

Crawling. 3 hours sleep = car keys not a bad idea, if for no reason than driving on very little sleep has been shown to be rather dangerous, even if you weren't going manic.

With regards to the 10k loan, why not wait a week to see if you still want to do it so you can be sure that its a good idea. If you still think it is after a week, then give it a go, but it will be really shitty to come down off this high into a period of depression with a 10k loan to pay off hanging over your head.

You know I speak sense, I hope.

Hearts - def not a big wimp and welcome to the thread. :)

Hello everyone. I am still in hospital (two months now). Medicines do not work. They will changed hopefully soon.

Its already done and a small part is really kicking myself over this.

Transfer the ££ into a savings account without easy access, so you have more steps to get to the money so it's not easily spent. 10k is an eye watering amount of money.

mirage good to see you. I didn't realise you we're an IP. Hope the drugs start to work soon xxx

Yes Babyheave I will do that thank uou.

Ive come down and now im stable yay!

How is everyone?