Sertraline and any other AD's Support Thread Part 2

[PackItInNow]

Just a continuation from the original thread, which is due to finish soon. Anyone and everyone needing some kind words, and hand-holding, are more than welcome .

Muddled it's weird isn't it how the shower thing is so hard. If I don't set the alarm and get up and in the shower before ds wakes up I CANNOT do it at all, all day. I don't know why, but it ruins my day, thinking "I need to get in the shower, I can't be arsed". So put it off but still feel anxious re need to get in shower, there have been many days when I have failed to do it and have felt much worse, due to sense of failure and beating myself up for being lazy, dirty bitch.

If I get straight out of bed and into the shower I have already achieved one of the biggest hurdles of the day, without even thinking about it, honestly it helps. I could go days without getting in the shower if I let myself but would feel dreadful for the whole time.

Very warm welcome to all the newcomers, big hugs.

This is a lovely, supportive, no judgemental place on mumsnet. You will never be flamed or be in a bunfight here. We are all here to be able to support, advise and generally be a shoulder to cry on for each other. It is a beautiful place to be

X post with fluffy

muddled you are not alone....i am also of the cant be arsed with personal hygiene variety if i dont have to go anywhere....there are days my hair does not see a brush.

boobs thank you....i know i need to be honest but i find it feels like weakness.

fluffy well done on the xmas wrapping and seeing friends - i think thats brilliant. im sorry you struggle with self harm. i always seem ok on the outside too, at home i can be a different person but to the wider world i am sorted. i wish it were true.

i also managed to wrap some xmas presents tonight - im feeling ever so slightly better as the weight of worry over work was lifted.

speak to you all tomorrow. hugs to all. (Yes i know we dont do that here but tough!) x

My therapy is called STEPPS, is specifically for BPD, but can be great for anyone, as its basis is about changing your thought patterns. I'm finding the group environment challenging at times, but because its an educational based therapy and not a ''lets all sit in a group and talk about ourselves'' I can cope We do have to do some sharing, but that actually starts to feel quite nice after a few weeks of getting used to it!

DP and I are going on a proper date tomorrow night - we normally just hang out here, because of DS, but we're doing dinner and film after he finishes work. Will be lovely .

Impressed with the present wrapping, you're putting me all to shame!!

DBT skills group is an educational teachy type thing. I am just nervous I guess. I never cry in front of people, I am so so private, I rarely get angry (or happy!), am just very closed off. I have elements of BPD, def the self harm, def a lack of emotional regulation but I suppose unlike the stereotype I am not unreasonably angry or volatile, there is just an absence of anything. And I wonder how I would manage that in a group. People know me as calm and collected and together, when in many ways I am anything but.

Have a lovely time at the cinema :)

Good morning ladies. It's nice to hear you're going on a date night with your DP Shakey. There's nowt like a good date to keep the spark going . I really hope it goes well for you.

I usually have a shower and imagine all my dirt was 'dirty thoughts', ie, can't be arsed and anxious-type feelings. I jump in the shower and imagine that I'm scrubbing all those 'dirty thoughts' away, leaving nicer thoughts to tax my brain IYSWIM. It gets me through the day if I have a

Good morning Fluffy. Not got much time as I'm getting ready for college, but can you think that the people in the group will be there because they're probably in the same boat as your good self, mentally (very private people etc).

Well, gotta bugger off to college now, but will be back later briefly as the kids have their Xmas party at club, but take care all you good ladies .

Fluffy one of my friends from the group is similar to the way you describe yourself. She has found things like identifying emotions really hard, and really struggled to come back after the first few sessions, but now she's glad she did, and is recognizing positive changes in herself. Everyone in our group has cried at least once, FWIW

It's the last session before New Year today, we're going to be discussing surviving Christmas - will post any helpful tips.

Hi everyone. How you all feeling today? I tell you, a bit of sunshine makes a world of difference! I feel lots better today. Wish I didn't have to be on sertraline but I need it to cope with day to day life.

Hate side effects but I guess it's a small price to pay for my sanity.

I have some awful side effects including yucky night sweats, unable to sleep well, irritability, stuttering, poor short term memory and having to work hard and for ages to get to the big O with no loss in libido and worst of all, weight gain (from increased appetite after long term use).

Anyone else finding it a pain putting up with side effects?

Hope you all have a good day today. I keep telling myself all the time to just get through today-yesterday has gone and tomorrow isn't here yet!

morning everyone

Good luck at your group session boobs.

I saw gp this morning who has signed me off for 4 weeks. I am to go back in 2 weeks to get more sertraline. She thinks the fatigue may be things just catching up with me. im not sure.

She asked if things would be different when i go back to work, which i honestly doubt. i hadnt even thought about how i will cope when i go back.

morning feeno - x posts.

im just finding the side effects are feeling like they are starting to ease a bit - but im only on 50mg and today will be the 2 week mark.

PS boobs...how did you get your diagnosis for BPD? I have been suffering for years and years and I often wonder if I have BPD? I am very intense emotionally, can be volatile when I get angry or irritable, I am highly sensitive and find it difficult to cope in social situations. I often portray a very confident and 'life and soul' type personality to the world but inside I'm extremely negative and filled with darkness.

Hi vicar glad you got another prescription and your time off work sorted, maybe you can use the next few weeks to think about what will have to change or what can happen for things to be better?

Thanks for your comments boobs I hope your group went well today.

feeno I am not the person you asked but I can tell you my experiences of being assessed as BPD? I am 28 and since I was 19 I have had on and off involvement with the mental health team, mostly around self harming. Earlier this year I was admitted to hospital which sped things up a bit, but basically I was assessed by a psychiatrist and by a clinical psychologist and that was that! I don't have an official diagnosis but the reason they felt I met some of the criteria was the fact that my mental health has impacted me throughout my adult life. It affects me globally - work, marriage, day to day life. I struggle to manage in times of extreme stress and turn to self harm in those times. I often can't explain how I feel, my body language rarely matches how I feel, and I can be very superficial in terms of engaging with my emotions. I also have OCD which complicates my self harm in particular because I am very O/C about it which is not very typically BPD.

You need a referral to the CMHT for a diagnosis but a referral can get hard to get. Your GP would not be able to diagnose it, although if you discuss it with them they may be able to push for a referral for diagnosis.

Hope this helps!

I saw my psychologist today was quite a positive meeting really. I have committed to starting DBT in late February. Eeep. I think this next week will be really really hard to stay safe in, so taking it hour by hour.

evening everyone.

Good evening ladies, I hope you had a good reasonable day today .

I have to admit, I don't know a lot about MH problems as, unfortunately, I remember very little about my feelings when I had PND. I only vaguely remember wanting to kill myself. After that, I remember sod all squared. It's almost like my brain wasn't willing to deal with that part of my past and so erased most of it. I have tried to remember anything about it but just cannot recall anything else apart from the above.

Feeno my story is complicated slightly by the fact I was initially admitted to the mental health system because of an arsehole doctor seeing 'self harm' and 'anti-depressants' on my medical record and deciding I couldn't possibly be physically ill I was also 16 at the time, so was under the youth services. My diagnosis was finally confirmed last year (I think). I've been seeing the same psych for quite a while now, and think that's an important part of the diagnostic process, from what I gather. I'm happy to send you some information, or answer any questions you have :)

Date night was lovely, highly recommend The Hobbit to anyone, although there were more battles than in the book (!!!) and I'm not sure what the fuss is about surrounding 3D movies We had fun though.

Hope you're all okay.

glad you had a good night boobs! hope your group session went well. x

Hmm... Well... It was an interesting start to the week. Long story short - a woman who wasn't supposed to be coming back as she had missed too many sessions turned up, kicked off and trashed the room. So the session was cancelled within half hour of it starting!! I'm fine but a bit shaken up, arranged a one-to-one with one of the course facilitators to go over what happened tomorrow.

Did mean I got some extra time with DP though!

Two days SI free. Have been thinking about it all day, after what happened in the group, but have stayed safe :)

thats so unfair, how incredibly selfish - good luck tomorrow. well done btw.

the girl done good.....yes you boobs!

Well done on two days :) Brill. You sound like you have a great attitude about what happened in the group as well, very controlled, I think a de-brief will help as well. Glad you had a nice date as well, sounds like a positive start to the week.

I have had an ok day, I have seen my friend this afternoon and then I am seeing another friend tomorrow so lots of socialising :)

Not sure I have any side effects from my sertraline yet, but only three days in!

Vicar thanks. Quite proud of myself. It was my immediate thought after what had happened, and yet I didn't do it. And now I am sat here, knowing there are plenty of things in the house, and I haven't so much as picked anything up. Baby steps.

By the way - exercise is a fantastic natural depression treatment. So if you could start running again, it might really help you. Before my ME hit, I went to the gym a lot, and then more recently did yoga until my abdominal pain got too bad to continue. The yoga took a while to get used to, but I ended up finding it beneficial on several levels.

fluffy well done for being social, its so hard to do sometimes. Hope you had a lovely day.

Hi haven't checked in for a few days but just wanted to say hello to everyone and hope you're all ok xx

Hello. Ducking in -sick children at home-been hemmed in since last Thursday as the bug goes around all of us. there are only so many times you can watch cheesy Christmas movies!! Drs tomorrow for 3 week review-don't feel terribly different except my head has stopped whirling round at great speed, overthinking things. Still having some side effects, but I don' feel drunk anymore.
When people have increased the dosage-did you get another round of side effects?

Hi All haven't been on for a couple days as side effects took over! lookslike every1 is doing great xxx

evening all

i feel much more relaxed but i think that is more to do with the pressure being off around work, that said i cant really tell if the sertraline is working or if i am just happier knowing i dont need to worry for a few weeks about it, the side effects certainly seem to be less noticeable but its been 2 weeks now so maybe its just in my system now....i hope to goodness the fatigue disappears for good or i will struggle with nights on going back. I also have a new focus for my anxiety as i have to go for an endoscopy for reflux. Should the sertraline be taking away my anxieties? if so its not working....

anyway glad everyone is still checking in and managing ok,