PND Stigma

[Tryn2hrd]

Just wanted to know if anyone finds PND realy difficult to admit to themselves and family. I have only been diagnosed for 2 mths and just told some family which didnt go as well as i hoped. Do you find that people react badly to you when they know you have this? I find myself having to explain its not about the baby because i'm lucky that I bonded its just everything else that makes me upset (including everyone else) I have isolated myself and its taken so much to try and tell people that I have this but noone has offered any help or rang to ask how i'm doing. They make you feel as if you are catching and that you are a bad mum. Does anyone have any tips on how to tell people what i'm going through without actually telling them IYKWM Its so hard to ask for help and its what i really need sometimes. sorry I'm a bit low today just tryn to come to grips with this all and figure out what the hell is going on.

Ohhh I wish i could just come out and say it and tell them i'm not what they think I am the great pretender!!! I'm just scared I think that I'm used to people knowing that i would come out on top of everything, I cope really well, got it good when really my head is all mush and I feel a fraud. Its the thing about asking for help i suppose i have the stigma in my head too as I think thats what stops me just coming out and telling all and sundry, but then i can tell strangers hmmmm good thinking for a friday night!!!!!

That's it exactly, expat! I had so many people say, "Oh, but you always seemed to have it so together!"

oh, yes, jabber. i was back working 2 months after dd1 was born, drugged to the eyeballs, wearing size 10 (UK) jeans from loss of appetite. so 'pulled together'. inside, i wanted to die.

so now i just tell the truth.

I know it well. I can remember thinking "My life is just hell from every direction. I might as well be dead." It scared the sh*t out of dh, but hardly anyone else even knew anything was going on.

I've told family and they kind of understood but I find it's other mums at m and b, and the hv who I can't tell openly. Especially all those mums who are out there who have a bonny babe and looking as if they coping brilliantly - although I suspect on the outside I probably look like that too.

I had PND with 2 of 3, most notably with Ds1 when all I knew what to do was put him in his chair and rock him. I remember talking to my Mum but she was very dismissive and I didn't really erealise what the issue was. It was only after ds3 came that I came out of it and realise just how dark things were, fortunately i came through OK and am making a real effort to enjoy DS3. it's sad but there is so uch stigma and I don't know why.

i think that there is so much stigma because that hardly anybody is willing to talk about it openly for fear of being labelled as anything negative. i find it easy to admit (even that sounds bad to my ears) that i have pnd on here because i know i'm not alone in it. sometimes i can't even tell dp how i feel and it ends up with me taking it out on him and it turns really foul sometimes

but do you not find trhat when you are crying people say "I trhought you were so strong" or "I thought you were doing so well"

that makes you feel worse - feel like you've let them down

yes it does. but to me, at the moment, if someone who's posed to be a friend says that when they haven't bothered phoning you for a while - it really annoys me. it's like they don't know you as well as they say they do. i don't know, maybe i not being fair?

(((((hugs)))))) for every1 low today xxx

It's not PND it's clinical for moi, can I have a hug too?

((((((hugs))))))))

not sure if it will help but there are great threads on only joking that might help lift you a little (((((hugs))))) i not too down today, though maybe it's cos i got another days holiday from job seriously though its not too far away sometimes and the smallest comment can set things going. i hope the joes help lift you all (((((((hugs and kisses)))))))

well that bloody well changed didn't it? not sure if this is the right place to vent but am feeling really really at mo. dd was watching me warm her nightclothes on fireguard, (a babygro and her dressing gown) she took her dressing gown away from me cos it fell off, she was sat by the end of the fireguard trying to put her dressing gown on it to warm up. so called dp was in kitchen washing up and i called him about ten times to come and see what she was doing because it was the first time she'd done something like warming her night clothes.and he didn't watch her, all he could be bothered about was the cleaning. and hurt. it's not the first time either that he put cleaning first. when i was still on mat leave, i went into town with some friends and ended up buying her bouncy chair from argos. now bearing in mind, this was at the other end of town from the bus stop and she had the big buggy at the time, iwas still sore from stitches +scars if i walked too far or long and he wouldn't pick us up then because of cleaning. that particular day ended with me crying inpublic and my friend phoning to ask why he wouldn't pick up.

sorry about the long rant but tonight ended with me saying that if he couldn't see why i was upset ( about him putting cleaning before dd), then he could just leave. he said i sounded like a broken record and that if he didn't want to listen he would just switch ito ff. ffs. i feel like i have to ask him sometimes to look after his own daughter so i can get some thing done for myself good grief

someone please advise, anything ........

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