I have been sectioned.

[lazyhazydaisy]

I have just got access to the internet. I am much less petrified than I was at first but definitely 0 out of ten. I have a tribunal and if that fails I think I will be here until July. I feel as though I am living in a nightmare. I have never felt so alone.

You do need to complain about the way you were treated by the police if you feel you were mistreated. I would think the Mental Health Advocate you spoke of could advise you on the process? I think it's important to take a stand because that's how practice changes.

Why did you not ask what the tablets were if you weren't expecting any? I'm not dismissing what the dispensing nurse did, that was a serious error and it really should not happen. Our drug charts have photo's on mostly, but if in doubt I check date of birth and full name before I would be happy to give a patient meds, and if I had current doubts I would liaise with colleagues. Drug errors can have serious consequences!

I am also always pleased if a patient queries the meds they have got, the same pill can be different size or shape from different manufacturers. I think it's important to recognise nurses are not infallible and mistakes can happen. I would never take a pill handed to me without checking what it was if I was in the slightest bit unsure. You should take an interest in the meds you are prescribed, they are powerful drugs you are putting into your body, it would be to your benefit to understand how they work and the potential side effects.

How come their is a suicidal teenager in the next room to you?

Exactely how old are they?

I did question the meds, but after I had downed them. It didn't occur to me that they would make a mistake because they seem so meticulous. And I was fast asleep when the nurse came in so I wasn't exactly on the ball. And I had only changed the 8am regime a couple of days ago and I thought that they had forgotten. It could have been very serious, I agree. As it happens the person they were meant for is pregnant so I didn't worry too much that they had given me something really dreadful, iyswim. The nurse who gave them to me told me that she was just the runner, and it was the student nurse who made a mistake, although the student nurse was being watched by a staff nurse. It was the staff nurse who came to tell me, looking extremely uncomfortable.

I am not sure whether to kick up a fuss. It is the least of my problems, isn't it?

I don't know how old the girl next door is. All I know is that she is in for 'suicide' and that she has a serious medical condition that is the reason for it. She seems lovely. I bought her a 2012 diary and 2 mars bars as a welcome present; she has lots of dates to keep track of.

I just had a chat with another patient, who told me with complete sincerity that the people who pretend to be her parents are imposters and so are the people who pretend to be her siblings, who buy her clothes and tobacco. I asked a few questions as to why they would do this and who her real parents are but she said that she didn't know. (Just to give you a feel for the company on offer here). She has been here for NINE MONTHS. I have just invited her to watch that royal wedding T-mobile thing on Youtube, to make her smile. She sleeps all day and appears to be very (not sure how to put this) slow but she has read Midnight's Children, and Wild Swans and (tbh) bore challenging books than I have read in years.

The one who thinks I am trying to kill her is still stalking me around the place, and she has now been completely banned from the double doors to my end of the ward. I am so bloody grateful that other inmates patients have recorded their own fears about her, or it really would just look as if I were paranoid.

You sound like you are adjusting a little to the routines of the ward Daisy and it was pretty awful that you were given the wrong meds, but as they have not harmed you, it is probably best to let the matter rest, other than
as Doyouthink (who is clearly a HCP possibly on a MH ward) says, to make sure that if there is anything different in that little cup to ask what it is and why you are having to take it.

The thing is on an acute ward, there are obviously going to be some very disturbed and distressed patients, some of whom may be out of touch with reality for a time, and it sounds like the lady you mention (talking about her relatives being imposters) may well have a thinking disorder at the moment, and it is taking a long time for her to get well, but that is all to the good really because she is in a safe place and is getting the right treatment for her illness. It's much the same as being in hospital with a phsyical illness or following a bad accident etc., some people will be in for months too. Nobody wants to keep patients in hospital longer than is absolutely necessary.

How sweet of you to buy the young girl a 2012 diary and the chocolate, and that's when you are struggling yourself at the present time, so you obviously have a generous nature.

Take good care and try to distract yourself as much as possible and join in some of the activities on offer if you can. At least it helps pass the time, as the days are long aren't they. I was "lucky" enough to be in hospital in the early Spring in 2010 and it was particularly warm, and sitting in the garden really helped me get through the day......no such luck now in murky old Jan.

Keep us posted Daisy sending you warm wishes.

The picture painted here of mental health wards - not just by Daisy but by people who have some professional knowledge and other people talking about their experiences - is very worrying. Hardly seems therapeutic to dole out some drugs, keep people locked up and leave them to get incredibly bored all day. Do hospitals really do nothing else for inpatients? No attention from the nurses other than drugs rounds? Especially when they can't even get the ruddy drugs right!

Edam, if I don't take my medication orally, they will get as many nurses as it takes to sit on me and inject them into me. I have repeatedly asked them to put this policy in writing and they will not.

Not only do I know patients that this has happened to, I have heard a patient two doors away being told, 'You know, (first name), that if you don't take it we will have to give you another injection.

My psychiatrist is on the ward two mornings a week and I see him on one of those mornings with no notice given. These meetings are only ever about drugs, not about 'me.

There is 'occupational therapy', but it consists of (not joking) cooking bacon and eggs and doing jigsaws, and things like that. Very, very key stage one, iyswim.

I ordered this laptop from Argos, and I am grateful to be able to use it.

However bad it sounds, it is much much worse. A large number of patients are very very noisy and often obscene in their language. There certainly are some very sick people here. One kept banging on my door at 2.10 am telling me she had a buddha she wanted to give me to make me feel better.

She also sings (out of tune) in the middle of the night.

If I didn't force myself to do the language learning and go to the gymn I would do nothing all day. I have certainly not seen any sort of therapist or counsellor and I have been here for weeks.

I am dying of loneliness and boredom. I had almost kicked smoking when I arrived but now, like almost everyone, I smoke from boredom and frustration.

It is definitely the police aspect that concerns me most. I am not using the word lightly, but I still feel traumatised.

I know what you mean about being traumatised :-(

I remember, when I was trying to leave, a nurse saying 'but you said you wanted to get properly better!' and me asking her what, exactly, was going to get me better in there.

I would go back again if I got very ill. It is safer than roaming the streets in distress and it does give you the chance to get meds etc sorted and calm down a bit. It was awful though, and if you aten't completely doped up or daft it is even worse. I have worked in wards before I got ill and I honestly felt like I was at work sometimes - persuading people to take meds that they obviously needed, talking to student nurses about various guidelines, telling the nurses about ligature points they hadn't noticed and so on.
I think next time I won't let them know I can understand what they are saying so I can eavesdrop on them talking about me a bit more :-)

Either that, or ask for access to the staff library for whatever my latest biological psychology essay is :-)

I used to correct the grammar on the information given to me as well.

What can I say, I was manic, I needed a lot to keep up with my racing mind :-)

It's hard, but just remember that getting worked up won't help and in fact could work against you. I did a lot of made up yoga to stay calm.

I work on a mental health ward and have to say that everything that has happened to you has been done for your benefit.

It may not seem so at present but when you are well and have greater insight as to what is wrong with you and what you are being treated with you will probably agree.

As for the police doing what they did - there are very clear guidelines as to how you can be controlled and retrained and they would have had to follow these. As for giving you medication against your will, well you will be restrained and given it if you do not agree to take it under your own violition - this is for your benefit though - even then there are clear guidelines as to what you can be given and how and how you are to be restrained to allow this to happen.

I have a lot of involvement in the section process and it isn't easy to section someone, is a last resort to stop them harming themsleves or others and has to be agreed by more than one professional.

Please try and relax and realise that you have to start working with the professionals amd following whatever therapeutic programme they have in place.

You should be allowed to attend your ward reviews and put your points across and have a say at your CPA meeting - I am sure there has to be one at least every 6 weeks.

I have just read the definitions of my 'differential diagnosis', (from the ICD 10 Classification of Mental and Behavioural Disorders), and I can honestly say that they do not correspond with any thing, except, 'irritability, fearfulness and suspicion'. Which I think are highly understandable in the circumstances, and also, part of human nature.

I have never had any hallucinations, of smell, voices, sounds or visions.

I don't see how I match any of them. What does 'differential' mean in this context?

If I make any attempt to speak to a nurse they only ever tell me to talk to the doctor, who I only see once a week for a brief mtg about meds.

HELP!

I do know just what you mean Daisy but the drugs have to get into your system somehow, as they are what will make you better in the end. If the medics just left you alone without taking the drugs or giving them by injection they would not be doing their job at all, and you will not get better but get worse instead, so while it sounds harsh, it is necessary that you take the drugs. Is there any reason that you won't take them orally?

I know what you mean about there being very sick people on the ward as I experienced this too. I am surprised someone is making a noise at 2.00 am as usually the night staff sit where they can see down the corridors or hear the commotion. The trouble is as I said before, everyone on the ward is there for a reason and have different types of mental illness and it can be very distressing for other patients as well as the people who are behaving in a bizarre manner.

Given that the way you were treated by the police is really troubling you (unsurprisingly) I think you should make a written complaint and you have your laptop so could do that. Ask one of the ward staff for the name of the Chief Constable or Superintendent of the police force who were involved.

Edam - yes I'm afraid it is like that (oh dear I think we clashed on another thread - social workers maybe? anyway I'm sure we can move on. The most worrying thing is that there were 15 years between my 3 month stays on a pysch ward - once in 1995 and again in 2010 and nothing had changed in 15 years. Staff still came on the ward and didn't introduce themselves, talked to each other rather than the patients (these were nursing assistants) as the staff nurses were rarely seen. They were either in the office or in meetings or giving out meds.

We were treated like children sometimes and told to "behave" ourselves. The only time the nursing assts were interested in us was when we felt able to chit chat with them about their children, grandchildren, weddings etc., other than that they would just say "OK NN" and I would say "not really" and they would walk off saying "you might be better tomorrow" or something equally as banal.

In a way I was fortunate as the hospital I went in on both occasions was relatively newly built and there were a series of bungalows on the complex rather than wards as such. I had my own room and there was a nice little garden to sit outside weather permitting. The ward was just an open space with chairs and tables - nothing like a hospital ward. The first time I went in I was 51 and so was in an acute mixed ward, and the patients ages ranged between 18 and under 65. The occupational therapy was horrendous, very key stage 1 as Daisy says - "sticking" or painting jam jars! I refused both and got quite angry and marched off back to the ward with a nursing asst in hot pursuit. I was fortunate enough to have a friend who is an art therapist and she brought me in loads of paper and paints and felts and I started just messing about with these material on one of the tables and it started something quite amazing - one by one the other patients would pick up a felt pen or paint brush and do the same as I was doing, and gradually the tables had to be put together to accommodate everyone. Nurses never mentioned it. I had the feeling they didn't like it because they had not arranged it, but I didn't ask people to join, they just did and some of them stopped going to OT sessions and drawing and painting instead!

When I left the ward I offered to leave all the art material with them for the use of other patients, but they refused to keep them.....petty or what?

I was 66 when I needed inpatient care again and I was on the older people's ward, which was ok in a way because it was quieter, although sometimes people with alzheimers were admitted because the ward for this was full. They could be very worrying when you are ill yourself, because one or tow of them got very aggressive and shouted in our faces. The nurses would then intervene and try and get them to sit down, but they seemed to like wondering about.

There were one or two nursing assts who were quite nice the 2nd time I was in, but mostly they just talked between themselves. No-one ever asks you anything about what might have triggered your episode or anything like that and neither did either of the psychiatrists I saw when an inpatient. This last one was a bloke who just seemed to treat youlike you were a piece of furniture (no eye contact) and just generally very detached. It was quite clear that all the nurses were afraid of him. Mind I did get to tell him off in one review and there was always a ward nurse there, and she told me "well done" when I came out of the review. It got all around the staff and they would say to me "Oh you had a go at DR x didn't you - good for you"

I am seeing a psychologist now on the NHS and she has told me that she is trying to change things on the wards, so that people do get psychological help - and not before time either!

So sorry for the awful time you're having , daisy . You're certainly not being given enough information , and I agree the forced medication is very controversial , though I totally respect the experience , including of pofessionals , on here .

Am trying to think of any usegful suggestions - just so glad you'vre able to communicate with outside world . May I ask if you're happy with the person cclassed as Nearest Relative? Is it your Mother? You said her info to the HCPs was ill informed and inaccurate .I expect your advisors re: tribunal etc have discussed this with you .

Many , many sympathies if diagnoses may be inaccurate - obviously out of my depth on this one , but I have certainly known plenty of people over the years with notes full of wild speculation and total nnacuracies over basic facts .( have never been in hospital myself , only work placements , but have seen lots of friends sectioned )

Daisy, a differential diagnosis is one that has been considered and ruled out! So maybe the list in your first post is all the possibilities that had been considered before making the actual diagnosis which led to your hospitalisation?

I hope you are able to get a decent night's sleep and at least feel rested in the morning.

Oh NanaNina , I've known of events like the nurses all appearing intimidated by a psychiatrist then thanking patients who formally complained .

So sorry about the lack of regard to life events / circumstances triggering the mh problems - outrageous . Is that really effective long-term ? Isn't the person less likely to recover without support & strategies to manage their problems ? Sorry to rant , but haven't these questions been asked for decades ?

What MadameCastiafore said

Take care op, I hope it works out for you.

I'm bowing out of this thread now before I get lynched for being a Mental Health Nurse

Please don't go , Doyouthinktheysaurus . Your experience is exrtremely valuable to daisy and we can all express our opinions based on training & or experience , without conflicting and being unhelpful to OP

I would never refuse to take anything orally because the prospect of being pinned down and injected scares the hell out of me.

The most frustrating thing is the nurses who (though most are pleasant) just say, 'tell the doctor', when I hardly get to see the doctor. And the mindnumbing boredom. I am using a dongle that cost £9. I don't really understand how it works; will find out tomorrow.

Re: ward reviews and CPA; will ask at night time meds.

It may mean possible diagnoses...are you on a sec 2 or sec3, I think for sec 3 they have to specify diagnosis?

I think with some diagnoses it can be hard to see you're unwell, I'm in hospital at the moment, and don't think I need to be (but don't want to see whether leaving results in MHA assessment).

You can insist on seeing the Dr when you want.

Daisy I don't have a similar experience so I can only imagine what you are going through. Just wanted to add to the list of people here and listening.

My own experience with drugs for depression was that I was very sleepy for two weeks and in a drooly daze for hours in the waking day. Good to see you are determined to keep your mind active. I think the blog is a good idea, or at least a private word document keeping details of your meds, appts and feelings.

I can understand why you'd take the meds...I'd be frightened that kicking up a fuss wouldn't work in my favour and would make me seem unreasonable and awkward. I remember feeling the same when trying to make my doctor lower or change my dose, the more I argued the more unreasonable I looked. I usually ended up crying or emotional.

What is happening with your partner?

I am an OT.

I have never offerred cutting and sticking or painting jam jars as an activity to anyone ever and i am so sorry that you have been patronised like this.

I have made bacon and eggs and done jigsaws with people and it's really not about cooking bacon and eggs its about getting you off the ward for a bit. Getting to know you, giving you time to talk if you want to.

Since you are stuck there for the time being, could you go to the OT and tell him/her what you are interested in. There is usually the opportunity to practise relaxation, pottery, art and more appropriate crafts. There should also be discussion groups and some sport type activities, swimming/badminton/street dancing etc.

They should write a treatment plan with you and agree on goals together.

I hope things improve quickly for you.

'You can insist on seeing the doctor whenever you want'.

This may be the case in other areas but I have just had a chat with the staff nurse (which I persuaded her into on the basis that I only see the doctor once a week for a short time) and I have been told I will see him on either Wednesday or Friday morning. So that is not the case here.

How much variation is there regionally?

Things going very badly with partner who seems to think that I see therapists and counsellors and talk about my personal life. The only time I have mentioned my personal life was when I started crying because they had got dc's ages wrong. He also thinks that I can leave straight away if I 'behave myself' (don't know what that means; my next tribunal is weeks away) and that the woman who thinks that I am trying to kill her should be moved to another ward (as if I have the power to move patients around the hospital at whim).

Don't particularly want to dwell on him atm; I should get medical notes from my GP soon (they have been very slow to send them) so I should get a clearer picture then, and even if parts are 'redacted; my lawyers can see them and tell me.

The staff nurse with whom I spoke described my behaviour here in the first three weeks as something like elevated. I was in shock. I paced the corridors, didn't sleep or eat properly, just wanted to wake out of the nightmare. And after about three weeks of that I sort of gave in, and allowed myself to become institutionalised. And, on lawyer advice, to appear as calm as possible. Rather than labile. That word came up a lot

I haven't noticed any difference with the drugs except a dry mouth.

Serin, I see my gymn stuff, learning a language, reading and doing crosswords as my own OT, and at a level suited to me. That and reading pyschiatry books.

Boredom is the killer. I am doing my best to stay in my room to avoid the other patients, who 'present' in an alarming way.

hopefully you will get some leave soon (s17?) whether they lift the section or not - do you get any leave at all yet? Accompanied, to the shops or something?

really feel for you, don't think I have ever quite got over the shock of first admission (or all the subsequent ones) and I still feel misdiagnosed but tired of arguing with them

don't know why people are shocked about the Internet access, we had an actual Internet cafe in the social centre at my old hospital and were encouraged to use it

hope you can make some friends while you're there though, you sound a bit isolated and I think it helps to have people to talk to who are in a similar boat

I had very similar experience to OP & NanaNina when sectioned about 10 yrs ago. The level of 'care' offered is sometimes awful but agree it does differ from area to area.

Agree with others to try to keep yourself occupied, on my second admission (not section, self-admitted) discovered exercise classes which were great & really helped me feel better.

Hi serin - the OTs I had when in hospital in 2010 were brilliant and tried thei hardest to get people involved, which wasn't always easy with older people. They did huge crosswords (pasted to the wall) and they would read out the clue and we would try to guess. We had relaxation sessions every morning. The discussions from the newspapers were less successful. We did a bit of "gardening" when the weather was warm, which was nice. We did do drawing and I was fine with this, but one or two said "it's like going back to school this is" and seemed quite embarrassed by the whole thing. I can see why as you could choose to do your own drawing or colour a picture, which was quite childish (I didn't mind) cus I often do colouring in "adult" colour books! The OT sessions certainly passed the mornings away.

HI Daisy - I know how boring it is. Just try to find things to pass the time that aren't too taxing. Sorry your DP seems to have a very unrealistic view of mental illness. Do you have kids Daisy?

OnwardandUpward sorry to hear you are in hospital again and hope this time it will be a shorter stay. Are you managing to distract yourself with anything?