The Cybergarden - Midwinter Edition

[shodatin]

Hope this is Post No. 1001 equivalent, having just used up the thousandth space and feel I shouldn't ask Madmouse to organise the next one again.

Have just looked into summerhouse to check fire is burning gently, tray of [brew} organised by upward to turn into one's favourite hot drink of the moment is standing ready for visitors, along with a few pounds of chocolates from huge box sent by DSis. (Before DB eats any more today)

It's usually tianc, upward and hob who remember to be hospitable and also remember to send good wishes to previous visitors, including said madmouse and mouselet, kizzie and family, NanaNina, Butterpie and another name which eludes me just now, but am hoping you'll find your way to this new part of the Cybergarden
and continue visiting in the New Year, along with hob's time-travelling cat Her Felinity and her welcome associate ndt (next-door's-tom), who visit us quite often, bringing gifts of when they remember, instead of the usual dead rodents which they know are unwelcome in the cybergarden.

Have just had lovely large lunch, plus Skype visit from rest of relatives, so will have a little potter round RL garden, hoping all is well and welcoming now in cybergarden's summerhouse.

Ooooh , thank you very much , [gsmile]

Perhaps you need to be extra kind to yourself ... hmmmm, you said the professionals were less inerested in the sleep aspect < despairs at this > any chance they suggested anything yesterday or today , but your memory was overstretched ? - do you have any temazepam left ? Will the team give you a ring tomorrow , or can you ring them to ask ? Would be sensible

< HF snores delicately under winterwight cat duvet >

I honestly can't remember. I'll take what I was taking.

Sounds sensible - hope you get more rest tonight < understatement >

< adds some of Nilgiri's lovely hickory wood to stove >

Hope we all get a peek at the stars as we make our way to bed ... such bright moonlight here

Have just sent a few words as a wave before going to bed, but nothing's showing here...
Thanks upward for info re Radio 7; sleep well all and will check stars hob. Night.

Night all, sleep well.

Yet another sunny morning. If this is global warming, it's very nice in East Yorks, although when checking the stars last night there was only cloud in the moonlight, so probably too warm.
You mentioned DB hob, well I rarely Skype him as he's often either outside or napping or simply not switched on, but usually skypes me around this time, lunchtime Sat. When I get tired of gazing at my food, I have to tell him to do the talking, as I rarely have news anyway and prefer to email it as I remember, but it is regular contact and a good idea, despite odd notices and/or cutoffs sometimes.
Thanks for comments on latest prescription problem, and will first contact suppliers to check just how many prescriptions they received this week, rather than assuming it was more interference from usual person - definitely worth asking for your comment/s!
Hope everyone slept well, particularly upward, who has difficulty making up the hours in daylight, like the rest of us.

I hope everyone had a better night. The psych's letter to the GP came this morning, I'm not sure it's right. E.g. it says I've agreed to consider a short admission if I don't improve.

I plan a quiet weekend. Glad it's sunny with you, shodatin

A beautiful day here upward, and can see why you were surprised to read the letter if you had not actually agreed to be admitted. I remember someone on the thread suggesting that an advocate might be a good idea, and wonder if this is the kind of thing they could help you with?
Hope it will be a relaxing and interesting weekend upward. I plan to do some more sewing on the project I started at Christmas (just habit to do something different every year, but having DB slowed me down). I usually do social contact at weekends rather than evenings these days, and have five "my turns"
on my list for tomorrow, so am defrosting one of my usual Idle Pies (a bowl of anything I fancy/find in fridge, topped with pre-cooked sesame potatoes.

I recently met someone who's favourite packed lunch was big chunks of cooked potato sprinkled with grated cheese and microwaved, and when I expressed surprise, told me her favourite pregnancy meal was baked potato skins, sprinkled with sugar and served with ice-cream - wonder if MNet would accept that in the Desserts and Pudding section?

at Idle Pies What glorious meal suggestions , shodatin - yes hurry , MN needs your culinary secrets - I particularly like the sound of sesame potatoes < wheedles >

Sorry there's uncertainty about the letter , upward - can you have a face to face appt with GP to go over it ? I see that you negotiate with the mh team about your treatment , and was wondering whether you might talk the latest suggestions over with GP as you are feeling very pressurised by the services . However strongly we feel that we'd hate you to lose any of your say / rights ( which ought to be be absolutely irrevocable ) , we are very concerned for you and hope the new medication helps and that sleep and pleasant pastimes / company help you recover soon .

Agree advocacy sounds a very helpful idea - is there anyone locally you feel you can trust ? I know not all advocates are as unbiased as they ought to be -do you feel they would be unable to do anyhing other take the side of the team's advice ? We don't want you to feel unsafe and bullied by services

Like the sound of your sunshine , shodatin , & thank you for night skies report ! Hope you get some sewing done , joy joy

Sorry not giving interesting news , have lots of chores and a hospital visit , and am enjoying DH having some quiet time at home with his hobbies

Sewing sounds like a good evening activity. Idle pies sound a good solution.

My recollection was that it had been mentioned as a choice, not if X then Y. I could ask for clarification when I next go to the hosp, day services did accept me so I'll be up there anyway.

I totlly agree re: being better needing to happen, but I'm very wary of losing any say. Even now it feels like stick rather than carrot, if I don't go, comply etc or if I don't improve I could lose say. :( Even not answering qus enough.

Don't think I should dwell on this. Hope evryone has good evenings,

Hope your chores and hosp visit went well, hob

nilgiri thinking of you.

Good thinking not to dwell on it upward, because nothing to do about it at present, and why spoil a nice relaxing weekend, and as you say, you could ask for clarification while at day services sometime.

No longer sewing in evenings, as eyes need daylight these days, but will certainly be doing some organising and planning. I realise Christmas is over, but do the television programmers know this, I wonder? Still so little of interest available, shame I forget to look up Freeview or turn on the radio, and sometimes one just feels like watching at day's end. Hope you have a good evening too.

A quick wave on way to bed. Too tired to notice fire/rugs/s, so hope the fairies visit tonight.
Good sleeps to all.

Sorry to have amade you think of such stressful questions late on a weekend afternoon, upward , very thoughtless of me - will talk about this stuff at a more suitable time. Hope you have found a calming distraction this evening & that sleeps comes to you .

Oh no , sorry to have miszsed you , shodatin , and agree with your thoughts on trying to keep some precious time for trying to forget soul - sapping stresses

Oooh shodatin , I never have enough time to watch all the programmes I fancy ( and I get very impatient with the slowness of TV ) so may I try to think of some to suggest you look at ? Everyone seems to be complaining about the TV schedules and I know you might not like the Sherlock / Doctor Who stuff ( ? ) but what about the'm loving all the Dickens programmes ? Good programme about Dickens' wife should be on the i -player

Has been a very hectic evening & DH very shocked at FIL's attitude to MIL's future , but I think this is a therapeutic time for MIL and family , in a way - there have been years of very unhealthy pretence in which we've all felt very confused . I think once care managers / SWs are properly involved they will help MIL claim her rights and boost her confidence a bit

Hope Nilgiri has had as good a day as possible
< next door's tomcat stands sentinel on cybergarden wall >
< HF 's delicate snores lull us all to sleep >

Sorry for shocking typos - I do check , just don't seem to see

The fairies have been in and left room perfect for next day! Husband always believed in them...
Makes usual espresso with tray of own favourite s and remains of hobs healthy snack shopping.

Am interested in resolution of help for hobs MiL, as close friend died recently and her relatives are still appalled that her DH cancelled arrangements for help, even the free ones, and are no longer in touch. I think he probably suffered depression as his sight deteriorated, and was unable to cope with the reality that DW was no longer able to do anything for him. - very sad, and it is a good thing that someone will be supervising FiL.

Hope everyone had a good sleep and can enjoy today.

You're right there's not much on, shodatin

I see fairies in the form of nilgiri came :)

hob it's in my thoughts anyway. I'm glad that your MiL is seeing some resolution. :)

i hope everyone's ok.

Just had Skype call from DSis, who is now recovered from her fall and even able to wear lipstick again. However, she's just had another fall, climbing a ladder with box of Christmas decs to go in loft in grandchildren's room. Both wishing it had been video'd, as she fell backwards onto bottom, landing in big container of soft toys. Teddy-bears broke the fall, so no harm done, only it started up a battery toy, which started to play " Old McDonald Had A Farm" as she lay there under the box while decorations settled around . Glad it's no worse.
Time I switched heating on again, now the sun's gone in.

Oh dear :( V good that it hasn't knocked your DSis, repeated falls can make some people fearful :(

I feel sick at the thought of going to the hosp tomorrow. Not sure why, as it's not an issue.

Nilgiri I hope you're getting through the day well, and hopefully less flat?

shodatin , I hope there's something good to watch on tonight.

hob, thinking of you, DMiL and DH.

So sorry to hear that , upward- the bad memories must be enough to cause a real dread , but hopefully it will be quite a bit easier this time , as you know more about how it feels & what to expect ( but of course , this makes the anticipation worse , as you know it's definitely possible to be misunderstood etc ) .
Please do keep trying to think positively about the staffs' intentions rather than concentrating , as I would , on the rather inflexible systems & rigid protocols . You sound so wise in what you wrote yesterday , and I feel awful at the fear of losing your say ... I still can't link but you probably know of ( or belong to ) the Critical Psychiatry network , or the Soteria organisation , campaigning for more openminmded & humane treatment in the UK .( MIND are also running a new campaign)

The med changes which you are also worried about may take effect quickly in terms of causing you to feel sleepy , which for once might be helpful
.
Incredidbly sorry to hear you've lost a good friend , shodatin, and of her husband's uncharacteristic behaviour . How sad for all her friends - so glad you can be so understanding , & am am sure your attitude will make a difference to him , even if you can't bring yourself to talk with him either .

Agree diminishing health can trigger huge panic / anger in an already stressed carer , but in FIL's case there's a long history of EA towards MIL , who should have left decades ago . At least poor SIL is in agreement with us about her DF .( btw,Good to see there are finally pilot projects in training police etc about EA /DV in elders )

Loved your DSis's musical acrobatics , shodatin , though hate to think how scared she must have been for theose split seconds . So true what upward says about falls & confidence ( not helped

Doing even worse with not pulling my weight , but managed to sleep till afternoon , then lots of hectic errands with DH . Thank you so much for keeping MIL & family in your thoughts , upward - I can feel it working

Thank you for fairy cleaning , Nilgiri ... I was forgetting we have an open fire , too < flips >

Extra -comfortings all round

I didn't know of those, thanks hob. Will have a look in a few weeks. Your right re med changes too. That was a nice long post hob read it a few times :)

Hope everyone has a restful night.

Hope they are useful when it's the right time to lok them up . Just waving goodnight to all but will post properly later

< off to revise up correct routine for damping down open fires and woodburning stoves >.

Remember watching Great Barrier Reef on TV this evening, then coming round to see something else, but I enjoyed the bit I saw, super photography as usual from Monty Halls, but I'd have enjoyed it more with his dog gambolling in the shallows, chasing the fish etc.

DSis mentioned today's fall after telling me of plans to start yoga, which I said could help her even when not in class, like falling properly, for instance, so she probably did feel panic when it started, although laughing too much to leave the toy box when the music started up.

I only met my deceased friend's last husband once hob, and was just in touch with her daughter when she died, getting details of helpers being turned away when she and husband visited after Christmas. I thought my views might help them forgive him for their own sakes, but it's probably too early.

Thanks for the goodnights, upward and hob, and thanks to whoever manages to deal with the fire. Even the thought of it is exhausting, so I'll continue believing in fairies. Good night all, sleep well.

Sorry, reading but don't seem able to say much at the moment. And you're all dealing with such horrible things.

Upward, will be thinking of you tomorrow - lots of good luck with the hospital visit.

shodatin so very sorry about your friend.

hob if anyone can make sensible arrangements for your MIL it's you.

I'm more mobile, thank you all for thinking of me, but struggling because of DWP rubbish. This too will pass...

Can I just sit quietly and stare into the embers before the fire goes out completely?