The Cybergarden - Midwinter Edition

[shodatin]

Hope this is Post No. 1001 equivalent, having just used up the thousandth space and feel I shouldn't ask Madmouse to organise the next one again.

Have just looked into summerhouse to check fire is burning gently, tray of [brew} organised by upward to turn into one's favourite hot drink of the moment is standing ready for visitors, along with a few pounds of chocolates from huge box sent by DSis. (Before DB eats any more today)

It's usually tianc, upward and hob who remember to be hospitable and also remember to send good wishes to previous visitors, including said madmouse and mouselet, kizzie and family, NanaNina, Butterpie and another name which eludes me just now, but am hoping you'll find your way to this new part of the Cybergarden
and continue visiting in the New Year, along with hob's time-travelling cat Her Felinity and her welcome associate ndt (next-door's-tom), who visit us quite often, bringing gifts of when they remember, instead of the usual dead rodents which they know are unwelcome in the cybergarden.

Have just had lovely large lunch, plus Skype visit from rest of relatives, so will have a little potter round RL garden, hoping all is well and welcoming now in cybergarden's summerhouse.

Just been out with fat-drenched breadcrumbs for the birds - they'll be up long before me in the frosty dawn.

And it's beautifully clear and full of stars! Annndd verrrry ccccccoldd.

For iPlayer, you should be able to just click the link and then click the arrow to play the programme, shodatin, unless I've misunderstood which is quite likely. Works on my (newly-fixed! thank you DP!) laptop, anyway.

Do you think all our spoons are down the back of the washing machine or something? Definitely mislaid a few here, too...

It was a beautiful, starry night indeed Nilgiri, and I did think of re-clicking heating on to stand at window longer.Thankyou for info on how to use iPlayer - have done something like that before but can't remember name or details. Having it on tv screen would be even better, but possibly too complicated.
Lovely to have you back i/c summerhouse comfort Nilgiri, although thanks also to upward and hob for keeping the fires burning, [brews] coming, etc and whole atmosphere warm and welcoming in cybergarden.
We did have a visitor enquire "What's it For?" which hob managed to explain briefly and I'm still considering, being a bit behind as ever.
Beautifully sunny morning here again, so will get s with espresso going while planning the day.
All best wishes to upward for consultant's (possible) visit.

We commend you for your dedication to feathered persons ,Nilgiri < Disney style birds bring Nilgiri hot water bottle & warmed rug > and delighted also with your DP for hislaptop - mending

Hope your early night was helpful ,shodatin- am smiling at thought of us all stargazing and agree the content of the related programe was but that the conversation between the 2 presenters worked well & was perfect "fireside on a winter's night" TV . You will love Nilgiri's links -latest programme especially beautiful.

So embarrassed shodatinthat I haven't replied to your concerns about visitors to our garden , really sorry - I hadn't forgotten & see it as being between your desire for people to find a refuge here when going through a difficult time with mh , versus, for eg, my concerns that visitors might "challenge" a cybergardener going through a difficult time . Is that vaguely the main dilemma ? Am probably missing all sorts of othe raims .

I wonder if both goals could be achieved , though not sure if on the one thread ? On related threads perhaps ? with one moved to be less visible , as we were considering ? < ponders >

Hunting about for more spoons for you all

< HF snores delicately in warmest spot in front of fire >
< paw twitches violently as she dreams >

We're all sending calming & strenthening thoughts to you , Upward , and hoping you will get a better idea of the way forward

Hob, don't worry about being late with any replies, because I'll have forgotten the question -"I've slept since then"- as one old lady used to say to me. I don't know what the answer is, but as you said, we don't often get visitors, and thinking back, most people have simply joined in with good wishes or answers to problems being pondered, then wandered off until they thought of the garden again, which seems to work alright on the whole, (thinking of kizzie here, and madmouse, of course).
Am wondering if anyone else wants to have a say?

Oh no ! I posted earlier -but into a thread I was reading < tries to retrieve post >
soothing all round

Thank you , kind shodatin at" I've slept since then" ] madmouse and kizzie are of course often to be found resting in the summerhouse , just too busy to post as often as in earlier times , as of course they did for months < waves and cheers on mousling t >. Agree other cybergardeners might have ideas on how things might deevelop

Hope Upward is not too stressed and that Nilgiri isn't frustrated by circumstances < unrealistic hob > World - changing people have to live with a lot of frustration

Hope that if you did have chance to discuss drugs this morning Upward, you haven't had too much cause you to worry . Apologies if that too is very unrealistic and hope you get chance to talk through concerns with staff and friends .

Am hoping no message about a meeting arrives on my much-ignored phone as have many tasks to do here & can't be bothered with chatting with RL people
Upward*'s all round

I'm not allowed out by myself :( (theoretically I should be able to as I'm informal, practically it is a 'don't push your luck' situation). :(

I'd forgotten how long it seems til the next ward round after it's just happened, a week is a long time :s

Plan is see how the med change goes for a week, if no improvement then time to try a different antipsychotic. :(

I hope everyone's had a good day!

Oh Upward the not going out alone really isn't fair on you . I do wonder how the policymakers would cope with living under their rules .

Hopefully the dosage increase will help and you might not need to try new drug .
Really , really want to help in any way we can to make the next few days go more cheerily for you - are you up to listening to anything other than music ? Probably not yet but perhaps as you feel better you could attempt Comfortingly dull radio programmes ? Non - fiction audiobooks / podcasts ?

Sorry for absence but a security feature has kept blocking Mn for last few hours - I've been having kittens , as my DM would put it .If I disappear again it'll be for that reason .

Right , I ought to have another go at Battle of the Objects - am very pleased DH has found time to go & do hobby things with his friend . Hope we're all having a calm evening - I've had a good day , thank you , thoughtful Upward

< next door's tomcat begins trying to teach Upward to understand his meowing better than hob can >

< then decides he prefers to nuzzle Upward's foot and curl up companionably beside her >

Thanks for the update upward, and what a shame about the restriction. I remember when DB had to be accompanied back to his flat etc, and it's because the HCP's are responsible for patients, of course and none of them want to take any risks. Agree it must seem a really long time until next doctor's visit, and am wondering if they can offer you any ways of passing the time, apart from the chat groups (and the old favourite, having a bath). Hope you're feeling more sociable, and can at least take some pleasure from some of the other people, both patients and staff.
Have watched most of the stargazing programmes, I think, although never sure how much I've missed as eyes just close sometimes, and have also enjoyed just looking out of the window, although not bothered to get out the binoculars.

Love the idea of ndt trying to communicate - is he still a young cat?

Have noticed that Desperate Housewives programme is showing later, surprised as I thought it was Wednesdays, so hope I remember to watch/stay awake for it.
Definitely having a nice, calm evening here, after spending most of the afternoon doing some overdue sewing.

You have such good ideas , shodatin . I know the staff have to be incredibly risk averse but this is so unecessary & surely to the detriment of Upward's emotional & physical health
Am another one wondering whether there are any activities you could try in order to momentarily distarct yourself from stresses ?

I so relate to the 40 winks during programmes , shodatin . The sewing certainly sounds exhausting < pins medaal to lapel , won in Battle of the Objects > & I hope you caught some of your Desperate Housewives < pins medal to lapel for the Battle of the Objects >

< HF awakes and watches surban scenes in astonishment >
Oops , DH and friend on way so will say a goodnight for now but tell you about ndt later
Thoughts and prayerrs to you , Upward

Enjoyed the tv programme, hob, but not as much as usual, as they're running out of plots and humour, so it's really more of a habit, like keeping contact with people who've really grown apart over time.

Need to try emailing DB again, as don't understand delay from gmail, but it's really too late, so will say goodnight now, and hope we all sleep well.

Wow, so impressed at all these advances in the Battle of the Objects.

Upward how annoying for you not being able to just pop outside. Not that the weather has been exactly conducive. Brrrrrrr! Hope you're at least managing a brief daily change of scene. In the meantime, here's another fiendish type of puzzle for if you get bored of sudoku.

hob, yes, need to think about visitors. I know exactly what you mean about wondering what the new person was after, and concern about inappropriate challenges. But it now seems she was indeed looking for a mental health refuge.

I'm comfortable welcoming such visitors, but can understand if others aren't, especially at really bad times.

shodatin I'm nodding and grinning at "I've slept since then"! Ho yes!

Morning all, s inc. espresso all round, and remains of healthy snacks hob purchased a while ago - maybe it's time we put some out for the birds? Am glad it's no longer frosty here, but very dull without the sunshine.

Hope everyone slept well, and that upward is feeling an improvement by now. Just a suggestion, am wondering if hospital would allow short forays off ward if accompanied by responsible person, just something to look forward to now and again, like lunch outside?

Agree we really need to find things you can look forward to , upward. I suppose they can refuse everything on the grounds of understaffing but if nothing else can be agreed to , how about a Church service? Are there visiting services and chat groups , which I've never heard of till shodatin mentioned them ?

Oh no , I feel very guilty the visitor was in search of mh sanctuary .It was a very worrrying day for upward ( who would I'm sure have been gracious ) and I felt the post seemed a bit curt and might be from an aggressive trolly type . Of course a stressed person can seem curt < one who shoulld know > She said after Cybergarden was in Active Convos , which I thought meant she didn't realise it was in mh at all

I should have PMed you shodatin but panicked that it would worry upward at such a crucial time so tried to head it off . Hope the visitor has found a suitable thread or feels she can return here .

Ah Nilgiri, I see I awarded myself a double set of medals last night in my hurry to meet friend . Enjoyed your accompanying, though

Fog & rain here . Thank you for s . shodatin. Hope you've heard from DB .

< cyberbirds happily gobble leftovers >
< puts out new wholefood snacks > ... please say if we can send you anything similar , upward

Please don't go blaming yourself hob, if you had PM'd me I don't know what I'd have said, and still feel happy to follow lead due to my lack of experience with posting anything - er, what's a convo? Agree it was a very difficult time for us, being concerned about upward, and I think you put it very well, that we were a very small but longstanding support group with few visitors.
It was only much later that I thought "What if", and I'm sure either upward or Nilgiri would have expressed their opinions at any other time.
Not yet heard from DB hob, but it's nothing new, and I tend to phone if it's anything urgent/important as he's not always interested in checking emails. I think /hope I sent copy of note to me about delayed delivery of last one, but didn't really understand that .

That's lovely of you shodatin , thank you so much. I wish I could have worked out a more friendly an open ended way of leaving things otill upward and Nilgiri could comment .

Glad you're not too worried about DB not replying to emails , and that he is n't finding winter too difficult - is he able to use a sports centre/ gym ?

I think I've seen a wren !! Very small and almost round , as was fluffed up against the cold . Have seen one in garden once or twice but hardly dared believe it might be resident

< replenishes fat snacks >
< birds look disappointed as less tasty than Nlgiri's fat - soaked breadcrumbs >

refreshings for humans

"leaving things open till " , I thought I'd written , sorry

... and I keep forgetting the most vital important point of my rambling posts - shodatin, you are the thoughtful wise one the rest of us look up to - the very thought of you feeling you should let someone else take the lead < takes careful notes on quiet observation and humility >

Hope you're not feeling too awful ,Upward. You're a day closer to improvement in mh and I really hope the dosage increase starts to help you sleep , as shodatin says . Are conditions very difficult for sleeping , with checks and noise ? < HF sidles up for fuss >

Such a nice thing to say hob, am sure it's just because I'm probably older than anyone else on here - wonder if anyone else knows the quote about it's surprising how much can be accomplished if you don't mind who gets the credit? And I'm not humble at all, just getting on a bit, and still uncertain about welcoming newcomers.
It's about time I left for usual few hours, then I hope to watch star programmes again, but hope to look in before bedtime. Bon appetit everyone.

Am sure that's not it , shodatin - how many people have we known for whom age hasn't brought wisdom

I had never heard that saying , brilliant , and it ties in with a maxim Idon't manage to go by which is that there's something wrong in any situation where ego is part of the motivation < burbles incoherently but cussedly >

Hope you saw your stars programme , which I hope have recorded in this house

Thinking of you , Upward , and wishing we could do shifts there in your stead to give you a break . I don't mean to always sound negative & am sure they'll hit upon ways to help you soon and you'll be able to feel hopeful again without huge effort of will .

< more applewood on fire >

Wise saying is new to me, but very true, so thankyou.

Time went too quickly on star programme, although too long discussing aliens, complete with weird-handed monster probably a reject from Dr. Who. Unlike yesterday evening, Prof. Cox not telling people with odd ideas (about fake moon landings etc) to change over to ITV or watch Big Brother as not wanted here.

It does sound very much like a wren you've seen hob, and I think I've only ever seen them in the winter, as fewer leaves around - they do look nearly spherical!

Good idea to offer to trade places with upward, I don't mind being hot and would love to have someone bringing me food and drinks. Have never got the hang of mobile phones though - two in back of cupboard- so would need to hide laptop under mattress. I do hope the meds are going well and sleep pattern improving.

Thanks for applewood log on fire hob, and an earlier I forgot. Time for bed now - hope all sleep well and that all is well with Nilgiri and computer. Night.

I can't wait to see the monster on this programme, shodatin I didn't hear the good Prof shooing away non- conformists last night !

Ooooooooooh so you think it may be a wren !! It behaved quite distinctively , hopping all over the garden from one sad - looking planter to another . We'll probably revisit this subject , then , joy

I do wish we could do shifts in the ward , and I too would be desperate for any access to internet or at least emails .
Am a coward about so many things in the environment Upward describes - I admire her intensely & hope this stay isn't bringing back traumatic memories of longer stay last year Hugs to you Upward - please keep on keeping on , as Nilgiri puts it

Hope Nilgiri has has numerous good parts to her day and is less fed up than recent annoyances have perhaps dictated .

< Plump little wren sleeps peacefully before the travails of the dawn chorus >

Sorry I've yet again missed saying goodnight to you , shodatin . Goodnight to us all

A wren! How gorgeous! It must be very grateful indeed for your fatballs in this weather, hob. Such a tiny thing must feel the cold terribly.

But can I admit I'm secretly glad that the frost may kill off the greenfly? It's just wrong to have to spray at this time of year (eco friendly spray so have to keep applying it - and of course I don't).

shodatin your dedicated Brian Cox star-watching is very impressive. Very amused at different attitude to discussing aliens and discussing fake moon landings... Did you see this about a new planet found in another solar system by distributed data analysis (asking the public each to do a little bit)?

Upward, hope today's not been too grim. I like wise shodatin's idea that each day is a day closer to improvement, tho I guess you've long been adept at that sort of thinking.