Will you ban your children from certain sports

[CURIOUSMIND]

when they are playing instruments seriously?
I can see the reason is obvious.But when they are still young, deserve to do something else as well, will you ban them?
What do you do to avoid the risk?How about school PE?

exoticfruits

Suggest you read op again, because you still didn't quite get it.

The burnt finger is your business, not mine.

You seem to be getting very upset by me! The burnt fingers are not my business at all - not my child- he just happens to be one that would have agreed with you BUT his mother still thought he could do housework and she couldn't have got him out of PE and games had she wanted to ban them.
I doubt you can ban them if they are school lessons.

mathanxiety - you are beginning to make things up a bit. Based on what exactly do you expect to see or not see my plan A, never mind plan B,C or D?

Just because I suggest that little pianists should stay away from rough games especially given that they do not enjoy them much doesnt turn me into whatever you suspect me to be.In fact, I am too busy/lazy/laid back to control my DC's friendships - they just happen. Not necessary on a rugby field.

To show I have read it:

Would I ban certain sports? No, I would leave the choice to them.

If they deserve to do something else would I let them? Yes

What will I do to avoid the risk? Don't use the oven! Apart from that not much as they can hurt themselves in the simplest way.

What about PE? I doubt they can be withdrawn.

"Just because it is considered to be "normal" for most children to play rough contact sports , a musical child quite often would not enjoy it all. Being piled up underneath a bunch of muddy boys wearing boots with metal studs is not their cup of tea."

I do find this Fothington Thomas like characterization of musicians deeply depressing. And very unlike most of the musicians I know.

Hmm. The DC who excel at music at DS's school (and they are getting music scholarships to top independent schools) seem, most of the time, to also be prominent in rugby /hockey /cricket teams, so I don't really buy into some of the generalisations about musical children being voiced here. If I told DS he had to choose between piano and rugby he would be heartbroken and I don't honestly know which he would choose.

I suspect the sensitive little flower characterization is how they are seen by their doting mothers!

To say what I don't see is not to make things up.

Well, mine would choose football- but I see no reason to ask him to choose!

And there is a hig difference between an adult who makes their living by music being careful about anything that might stop them playing - and therefore earning- for 6 weeks, and a child not being able to practice for 6 weeks. One might mean losing a house. Then other means a bit of frustration- but having to find something else to do for a few weeks.

seeker - dotting mothers are annoying, arent't they? Especially when they dot on their own children.
I know it is not a big deal for you if my child is upset because he can't play. But it is for me. I am sure it would be for OP. Live and let live.

My children would choose their instruments over football if they have to choose, without any question. In fact, my house rule is: If they did something wrong, they might lost their right to play their instruments.

I really should keep away from this thread but it leaves me rather open mouthed!
How old is this child?
Having seen a lot of friends children through from babies to adults, several of them were very musical and 4 are professional musicians, none were precious about it - the one I mentioned was only trying to get out of housework as children do- they took a full part in school life and they had many interests. I think that even children on musical scholarships are expected to play sport.
If they are keen musicians they will choose instruments over football - so I can't see why anything needs to be banned by mother!
It also seems a very odd punishment to take away an instrument. I'm sure that the amount of control going on here is going to be counter productive- unless the DC is really dedicated- it will put them off completely.

I just find the characterisation of musicians as very sad. And by extension the characterisation of children who love sport.

Oh and pianomama, of course it's sad if your child can't play his instrument for a while! Who said it wasn't?

Luckily it is not remotely true, seeker. I know an 8 yr old who has a musical scholarship and he is quite down to earth and plays a full part in school life- as do they all.

Maryz I have written to DD's school to ask if she can drop 4 GCSEs as I don't think she can manage 14 GCSEs at the same time as preparing for audition to Performing Arts school. They have, of course, said 'no' (which to be honest I expected - but when she scrapes passes instead of doing well, I will at least know I tried). But they are being proactive about her PE lessons and letting her study during that time.

HE is an option DD & I have decided against after much thought.

14 GCSEs? Is that in any way normal? I stopped teaching about 6 years ago, but then 9 was normal, the odd child did an extra one and some did less... You'd think they could let a child drop to the usual 9 or 10, who needs 14 GCSEs, even if you want to go to Oxbridge 9 As and then A A levels are what they want, not 14 grade C GCSEs... What an odd policy on the part of the school Katy !

I've been amazed by your dd's school's intransigence before, Katy. My dd's grammar school only lets them do 10 GCSEs except in very exceptional circumstances.

14GCSEs seems OTT for anyone. I can't understand why you need that many.

I admit I haven't read every post, and any knowledge of rugby and gifted child musicians stems from my own childhood which was quite a while ago, but...

From what I remember, 8 year olds don't play contact sports. I can imagine that a beginner skateboarder or roller skater might break a wrist, but I think more children break bones on a trampoline.

I could be completely wrong, but I think children are more likely to have a sporting injury when they are really good at a sport and are taking part in it seriously (age 12+) than when they are just dabbling at the beginning (assuming correct supervision and safety precautions).

I would imagine that by the time you are 12 it would be obvious that you are a brilliant musician (i.e. regularly going on tour with your youth orchestra in the holidays, lessons several times a week, many performances) and you would be precluded from competing in a sport at a high level because of time constraints. AFAIK sport for 8 year olds tends to be quite supervised and safe. I agree that rugby can be very, very dangerous, but is it dangerous for children just taking part in a routine school sports lesson?

Ds stopped rugby in year 9, mainly because he didn't want to do it and didn't have time for all the matches with his other commitments either, but I seem to remember I did use music as an excuse (he sprained a finger in a match a couple of weeks before his grade 7 cello exam which was the final straw). He then did sailing instead which he far preferred but was probably only slightly less risky.

I can't imagine the situation where a child would be devastated by not being able to play a musical instrument for 6 weeks, but also have the time to take part in a sport at such a level that the nature in which that sport is played would make it likely that they would have a serious injury.

In situations where playing a particular sport might be a problem (your child goes to White Lodge, your child is a chorister, your child is an Olympic gymnast, your child is going to appear on Young Musician of the Year), I imagine there will be a coach/music teacher available to force the choice with little parental intervention.

I can't think that sport/life was safer back in the 80's when I was at school, but I can remember very few children breaking arms/wrists/fingers etc anyway, and I can't remember anybody doing this on a sports field. (I remember more people have glandular fever than breaking arms).

pianomama, to me it sounds as though no doting was necessary on your part. Your son is perfectly capable of deciding what he wants to do by himself.

To be honest, I think that "should I ban my musical child from contact sports?" can be crossed off the long, long list of "things a parent has to worry about".