I am happy with my children's state education but every so often I find myself talking to a 'private education' parent and just feel totally stressed

[Twiglett]

that there is no way my children can have the same quality and range of education and range of experiences and access to extra-curricular activities

poo-bum willy-faced bollox

Ah, Xenia, my husband's income would not cover living costs plus school fees (sadly - I will know better next time round). Property is our saviour!

FWIW, my school (a GPDST one, as they were before they lost the "P") aimed mostly to educate girls to become successful in careers (particularly law and medicine, rather tiresomely). My teachers would have been horrified by any girl whose ambition was to marry and have children!

Oh, and Quattro - I do the same when my state-school-parent friends ask me about DS's school!!

I am the opposite and thank god my child is in state education and we don't have to eat beans to send him somewhere where he may turn out with an attitude like xenias

Quattro - I always feel I have to justify it - shame.

We only did it because etc

none of my kids are in danger of that noddy - don't tar us al with the same brush

Oh you lot, honestly. You make me feel like starting a thread entitled "Why are all state school parents so CHIPPY?"

Here's an interesting article from the Times on Saturday. Many parents beg borrow and (I speculate) steal to make sure they can afford school fees. One staggering statistic quoted is that in 2006, an estimated £220 million was spent on school fees from remortgaging their houses.

article here

This means that parents are struggling to pay school fees when they can't comfortably afford it. What with inflation and credit crunch and house prices going down (so remortgaging hard) many parents are going to be in severe difficulties.

Xenia never responds to my questions. I had forgottne to turn on my xenia blocking software and got sucked in yet again.

Also emankana clearly meant that even though private schools have longer holidays as she would have to work long hours to pay the fees her kids would never see her.

And noddy said "may turn out with an attitute like Xenias" not "will". Blimey all this expensive education and no one can read.

don't tar everyone with the same brush

Beetroot - I understand and recognise the impulse to justify yourself - but the trouble is, any form of self-justification sounds so completely patronising.

1. "I wanted my children to go to an academic school" could be translated as "My children are academic, your (by implication) dull-witted offspring will be just fine in the state system"

1. "We wanted racial diversity" could be translated as "We want to keep our children away from predominantly white working class schools"

1. "We wanted our children to be educated in an environment where learning is valued" could be translated as "We care about education and you don't"

1. "We wanted all round sporting and musical activities" could be translated as per (1) above

And so on and so on. Really mumbling incoherently is the only way to go ...

I haven ever met those parents - maybe the school my kids go to is different - loads bursaries etc....there I GO Justifying again

I'm with cod on this one. Just never occurs to me to be stressed about this, generally speaking. Feel really confident that my kids are happy and getting interesting experiences at their school and that their life chances and opportunities aren't being irrevocably narrowed as a consequence of their schooling. I wouldn't necessarily feel the latter if they were at many private schools, I suspect.

I don't give a flying toss where someone sends their precious petals. BUT the condescending attitude of some parents who pay school fees does piss me off. For all the reasons listed by Quattro.

FWIW, I went to state and private schools. But the private one was a GPDST school so I don't feel too guilty about that. Founded to promote proper academic education for girls in the days when the poor went into service and the middle classes might do a little light needlework and deportment.

What is GPDST?

GPDST is now GDST

Girls' Day School Trust

Surely one should judge schools on an individual basis. There are great private schools and poor ones. There are great state schools and poor ones.

I'm sure that there are some private school parents who feel like that Sobernow. I'm also pretty sure that there must be some state school parents who do look on private schools with envy.

There are braying muppets who will look down on people who aren't privately educated, and there is inverted snobbery that paints everyone who privately educates their children as braying muppets.

We all make the choices that we feel are best for our families.

www2.gdst.net/introduction.php

Thanks, SueW.

Can I just say that apart from on here I never give it much head room and most of my close friends send their children to private school but we never talk about it apart from when they moan about the £

I know where you're coming from, Twig, but I find talking to Frogs about the whole subject a huge help.

Ah! The school with the horrible purple uniform down the road from my secondary school was one, I see from the link.