Should I report concerns about teacher socialising with pupil and parent?

[Jblingsmum]

My son dumped his girlfriend. So i asked him why. He said he didn't really want to chat about it but he did open up to his dad. He said that his girlfriend and her mother spend a lot time with a male teacher from school together. Football outing and meeting for the odd coffee together. Hes told her she needs to speak to the head teacher. Shes saying she wont. So he dumped her. I cant have my son mixed up in this. It doesn't feel right at all. Im sure this shouldn't be allowed.
If I report it. Its going to look like him.
advice needed

It's still their business and no-one else's.

Most schools give priority to the children of staff in their admissions criteria. Imagine! Actively ENCOURAGING teachers to shag parents (their child’s other parent).

There seems to be a lot of threads about people itching to 'report' other people for anything and everything even if it's nothing.
Bloody weird behaviour.

So far teachers can’t have boobs, children, friends or tattoos. Have I missed anything?

The girl probably doesn't want other pupils knowing the teacher is a family friend. Teenagers can take the piss out of each other for anything.
If your implying they're having an affair, why on earth would the woman be taking her daughter who goes to the man's school along with her?

What on earth has it got to do with you?

Are you worried for their moral welfare? Are you the Vicar of Dibley?

As an aside, well done to your son's girlfriend for dumping her self righteous twerp of a boyfriend! What were "hes" concerns? I'd love to know!

Or just making it up because he has been dumped?

This is the second weird thread about teachers I’ve read on here in the past ten minutes. It appears there are many parents who think teachers’ private lives are somehow their business. Odd.

My husband is married (obviously) and so is my kids class teacher. My husband sees her regularly. Goes to her house with our child too.

They've been friends for 35 years 🤷‍♀️

Still not seeing the issue here. Married people are allowed to have friends. Teachers are allowed to have friends.

Even ‘IF’ the mother and teacher are having an affair it’s still not a reporting issue. And it’s not like they’re trying to hide it, if it’s coffee meet-ups and football with her daughter?! Sounds more like friends to me!

Such a weird thread!

One of my teachers was married and shagging a parent of a child at the school.

shock.

So your son broke up with his girlfriend because her mum has coffee with a married teacher? And now you want to report that a married man is spending time with a married woman?

is there a cultural issue here you haven’t mentioned? Or perhaps your sons goes to school in 1875?

So are you saying that the teacher and your son's ex's mother are having an affair? And they take the teenage girl with them on their dates to watch football and drink coffee? That would be a bit unusual wouldn't it? Could it not be possible that they just support the same football team and neither of their spouses is interested?
I am in a sports club that my DH isn't part of. Most of the other members are married men whose wives aren't involved either. I promise you that no orgies are involved, we just share a common interest. I admit I have occasionally gone to a coffee shop or even the pub with one or more of them after we've been at the club because we are, shock, horror, friends. If I was having an affair with any of my clubmates though I am pretty sure that I wouldn't ask my teenage offspring to tag along!

"I cant have my son mixed up in this" what age is he @Jblingsmum?

Because he paid for tickets for the pictures.
He paid for her nails to be done. He works on a weekend to treat her and himself. She keeps blowing him out so she can go and see the teacher with her mum
She gets jealous when her mum spends time with the said teacher. I feel like shes jealous of her mums friendship with the teacher.

Okay. You need to take a huge step back from your son’s private life.

Do you have a job, hobbies, interests, friends who can tell you that you have lost the run of yourself?

How do you know the teacher and mum weren’t already friends and it’s all innocent?

We’re friends with a teacher at my son’s school, my husband happens to be best friends with her husband. It’s a coincidence. There is a possibility that other students/parents could see us away from school with the teacher.

What exactly do you think is the issue that needs reporting, and what do you think the school will do?

The fact that they are both married is not a school issue.

If your DS wont say what he thinks is the problem to you or school, then what exactly are they meant to do?

Suspend a teacher for knowing someone outside the school?

I don’t get it.

Are you trying to suggest that you think there is something inappropriate going on between this girl and the teacher?

Are you sure that this is not just your ds somehow feeling insecure and irrationally jealous of the teacher for some reason?

Please be very careful before reporting allegations that may be completely without foundation.

Unless you think there is some kind of safeguarding concern, it's still none of your business.

Perhaps your son just isn't great company, and he's not taking rejection terribly well. Help him with that instead of getting all worked up about this teacher.

Teachers don't live in a shed at the back of the school, you know. They are entitled to have personal lives. And your approval or disapproval is neither here nor there.

Crikey, when I was at school I used to be the dance partner (ballet etc) of the Headmaster's daughter. She wasn't a pupil at our school. I used to go to his house for tea and after dancing class a lot and vice versa. My parents also socialised with them at a badminton group based at the school. Sometimes my dad would give her mum a lift home... ooh and they were BOTH married.

Get a grip OP.

Your son sounds controlling tbf trying to tell his girlfriend what to do and how to think. She's well rid.
X

Then you need to tell him to stop being a mug and move on. If there is an issue that's for the girls mother to sort out. Sounds like Simon from the Inbetweeners and his constant whining about Carly. Would you be worried if she was blowing your son instead of blowing him out?

OK, so now with the drip feeding your outrage makes more sense.

What we need to know now is, are they friends or is something going on?

Because if there's nothing going on, again, what is the issue?

Even if they are having an affair, how exactly could that come back on DS?

All very OTT and dramatic.