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Original poster

Epsom College tragedy

543 replies

Bambala · 06/02/2023 09:46

I was horrified to read the story about the headteacher and family dying this morning, this poor family and I can't stop thinking about how the children at school must feel learning about this tragedy. I am sure the staff there are being brilliant at supporting them. I remember hearing that my old headteacher had died after I left school and even then being really shocked and upset.

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 06/02/2023 17:10

Hintofreality · 06/02/2023 17:04

Why has my post been removed?

I simply said I would never send my children to a school that had guns on the premises.

That's not all you said.

Back2Back2t · 06/02/2023 17:14

HymenOrNot · 06/02/2023 17:10

Not sure that the police will be making any further statements - case will have been referred to the Coroner now who will open an inquest in the next few days.
The Coroner will likely release a statement outlining the cause of the deaths

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Oh alright. Thanks.

JustanotherBerkshiremum · 06/02/2023 17:16

Skodacool · 06/02/2023 15:30

They also usually have combined cadet force

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Yes, we have that too, thank you.

Minteraye · 06/02/2023 17:17

LexMitior · 06/02/2023 16:42

Suicidal feelings are distordered. People with them should be helped, I agree.

But don't dismiss it as a risk factor to others. It is. I am sure that suicidal feelings affect others, sometimes to the point of harm. It greatly affects children to have such a parent, and this is not stigmatisation but reality. Whether it is years of threats, unresolved feelings of hopelessness, or finally actually killing yourself, the effect on children is huge. They do not choose that but they can be damaged by it. They are harmed.

If anyone is a parent and has such feelings it is a positive duty to get it addressed before that happens. There are plenty of examples of failure. Depression can be a very serious illness and external support is a must.

And yes, plenty of cases where suicide threats or behaviour result in reduced access to children. That is absolutely what needs to happen.

Threats of suicide (to children) or actual suicide are completely distinct from suicidal thoughts.

Phrenologistsfinger · 06/02/2023 17:18

Cuppasoupmonster · 06/02/2023 15:39

No, no, and no again. Guns are not toys. They should not be ‘entertainment’. Children should not be firing them for fun, regardless of how ‘classy’ the establishment. I’m all for extreme sports, I’m not a boring person, but guns are something else entirely - they hold zero purpose but to kill something, whether that’s an animal or another human. Nobody should own a gun or gun licence for mere ‘enjoyment’.

This

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 17:23

@dogdaydown errr woman is highly successful in her job. In tact so successful she becomes the first ever head of one of the best independent schools in the country. And yet we are not allowed to say ‘she was a leading light’. Ooooook.

dogdaydown · 06/02/2023 17:24

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 17:23

@dogdaydown errr woman is highly successful in her job. In tact so successful she becomes the first ever head of one of the best independent schools in the country. And yet we are not allowed to say ‘she was a leading light’. Ooooook.

Stop being so disingenuous, that's not what I'm saying.

I'm saying you know nothing and are staying your narrative as fact.

dogdaydown · 06/02/2023 17:26

*stating

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 17:27

@dogdaydown every statistic would say it’s the husband. Would be highly unusual to be the mother. Sorry but today of all days I am totally over male violence against women. Have you seen the police force discussion? So hang on in there with be kind. But I am over be kind.

dogdaydown · 06/02/2023 17:32

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 17:27

@dogdaydown every statistic would say it’s the husband. Would be highly unusual to be the mother. Sorry but today of all days I am totally over male violence against women. Have you seen the police force discussion? So hang on in there with be kind. But I am over be kind.

I am not saying it wasn't him, I'm not saying he didn't do it because she appeared to have a better job.

I'm saying you don't know. You're stating stuff as fact when it's your thoughts only!

This was also reported today.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leeds-64540343

A very sad day indeed.

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 17:40

@dogdaydown ok you got me. I don’t know. But we all do don’t we.

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 18:03

SoupDragon · 06/02/2023 16:52

DD and her peers were told at school today to be conscious of their digital presence and be careful what sources they trust when discussing/looking at the death of their ex head.

Advice a lot of posters here might do well to heed.

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How patronising. I hope the girls have a little more insight into the real world.

Oaktree55 · 06/02/2023 18:03

Guns have a place in society. For those saying ban guns that’s incredibly naive knee jerk reaction.

Cuppasoupmonster · 06/02/2023 18:06

Oaktree55 · 06/02/2023 18:03

Guns have a place in society. For those saying ban guns that’s incredibly naive knee jerk reaction.

It really isn’t. They’re deadly and have no place in a civilised society, no matter how ‘fun’ some people find them.

Oaktree55 · 06/02/2023 18:07

For all we know the household has its own firearms licence. If there were lapses in security re the School’s firearms then that’s obviously a very serious matter, but I doubt this very much!

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 18:08

dogdaydown · 06/02/2023 17:32

I am not saying it wasn't him, I'm not saying he didn't do it because she appeared to have a better job.

I'm saying you don't know. You're stating stuff as fact when it's your thoughts only!

This was also reported today.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leeds-64540343

A very sad day indeed.

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You stoop low. You KNOW the stats. But let’s show the odd incident where it is the woman shall we. You know that is unusual.

Oaktree55 · 06/02/2023 18:09

@Cuppasoupmonster how do you think the farming community exists 🙄. Firearms are pretty common in rural communities and quite rightly so.

unsureatthispoint · 06/02/2023 18:09

SoupDragon · 06/02/2023 16:52

DD and her peers were told at school today to be conscious of their digital presence and be careful what sources they trust when discussing/looking at the death of their ex head.

Advice a lot of posters here might do well to heed.

Show quote history

What are they afraid of? What should the girls not be reading?

HJ40 · 06/02/2023 18:14

Shooting being available in some schools is not about 'fun'. I'm not saying it's right or wrong. My school had a range and I didn't think anything of it, but today it is making me think, and if it transpires a gun from the school range was used in this incident then that's horrific.

Historically it was former pupils of the private schools who made up the (unpaid) officer classes of the British Military and they had to learn their skills at school. Again, to reiterate, I am not saying it has a place in schools today, but if you think it's all about high society huntin' shootin' and fishin' for fun then you are mistaken.

sunnydaytoday0 · 06/02/2023 18:22

Oaktree55 · 06/02/2023 18:07

For all we know the household has its own firearms licence. If there were lapses in security re the School’s firearms then that’s obviously a very serious matter, but I doubt this very much!

Would someone really be given a personal licence for a gun and ammunition whilst living somewhere closely surrounded by hundreds of children? I would certainly hope not.

dogdaydown · 06/02/2023 18:22

@Ndd135632 it's an on topic incident that happened today.

It disproves your theory and it happened today.

Stop trying to silence what you don't want to hear.

What I've stated is fact.

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 18:25

@dogdaydown oh my. But you know how RARE that is vs men being the perpetrators right? So congratulations on finding that one incident today. Well done. But you know the macro stats right? The rest of us do.

Ndd135632 · 06/02/2023 18:28

@dogdaydown am not silencing anything. Am saying you pull up a rare example. But you know that right? You know the stats. Or I hope you do.

picklemewalnuts · 06/02/2023 18:28

@Ndd135632 again, no one is disagreeing with your assertion that 'he probably did it'.

They are arguing with you for guessing what was going on in his head and stating it as fact.

Here are a few other possibilities purely to illustrate that yours is purely imaginary, like the ones below

He could have been very depressed.
He could have been diagnosed with a terminal illness.
He could have been afraid she would leave him.

Note COULD HSVE BEEN. It's speculation. I have no idea. Unless you are his therapist or close friend, neither do you.

That's all Pps are arguing with you about. I think you may well be right but that's actually irrelevant.

dogdaydown · 06/02/2023 18:29

picklemewalnuts · 06/02/2023 18:28

@Ndd135632 again, no one is disagreeing with your assertion that 'he probably did it'.

They are arguing with you for guessing what was going on in his head and stating it as fact.

Here are a few other possibilities purely to illustrate that yours is purely imaginary, like the ones below

He could have been very depressed.
He could have been diagnosed with a terminal illness.
He could have been afraid she would leave him.

Note COULD HSVE BEEN. It's speculation. I have no idea. Unless you are his therapist or close friend, neither do you.

That's all Pps are arguing with you about. I think you may well be right but that's actually irrelevant.

Exactly this!