School reports

[worksleep]

School reports on social media. Why?!!!

I have a FB friend who does this, and her son's report always says something like "James needs to ensure he shares his views appropriately" (= stop shouting out over the teacher!) or something similar. She is always ooooh look a perfect report

Maybe I am just unkind but even if my child was perfect I wouldn't do it. It's taking bragging to another level!

Do you honestly think being proud of your kid and sharing joy in their success is bragging? Do you look at everything your child does in relation to someone else?

@EllieNBeeb

Do you honestly think being proud of your kid and sharing joy in their success is bragging? Do you look at everything your child does in relation to someone else?

Yes I think it excessive to share on social media. Sharing your joy with your close friends and family is not.

Only losers do this = fact.

Oooh I have seen so many this year!

DD has shown her grandparents face to face but I find it weird (and a bit cringe) when parents share it on social media.

Also my DN has some difficulties and has never had a "glowing" report in her life. Parents like my DSis must feel really shit trawling through sm at school report time

I have a friend who does this for her ten year old ds. Every report, merit certificate, swimming certificate etc is on Facebook for all to see. The child was very premature and mum always does a #premature Etc on the post.
I'm torn, I get where she's coming from as she experienced being told her child wouldn't live, wouldn't walk, talk and so on. So the lad has come a long way and I'm pleased for her. It's getting to the stage where I do wince a bit though and I wonder if at some stage he will start to object to it himself.

Maybe you need to reassess how you add people on social media. Most people do use it for their friends and family. Your weird attitude about other people's positive life events, as everyone else's in this thread, says more about their negativity/pettiness than anything else. How you perceive someone's positive life event is on you. It's on you that you look at things through such a resentful and judgemental lens.

Like, literally you could be a person that thinks aw, it's lovely Kate's child has done so well,or the person that thinks ew, so weird that she posted that? Why is she bragging? I'm going to go ask Mumsnet. Surely it would be easier to be happy for someone.

@EllieNBeeb this obviously means a lot to you.
I think that there's a world of difference between saying on Facebook "I'm so proud of Rebecca for another lovely report"
Which would probably make most people think "oh that's nice"
And posting the whole report for people to see, which is a massive overshare because the report is for your family and honestly, most of the time nobody outside those closest to you actually want or need to see it.
There's sharing and then there's oversharing I think.

Yes, that's certainly your opinion, and other people sharing their children's successes certainly has some sort of negative effect on you.

There is, of course, a lot of writing about certain people finding social media harmful to their mental health, that seeing other people happy and showcasing their 'best life', which admittedly is not a full picture of life, makes people depressed/resentful/jealous. If you are not the type to think positively toward others' good fortune, perhaps social media is not for you.

My school reports were atrocious! I had undiagnosed adhd! Until the age of 40.
Thankfully my reports came in useful for my diagnosis.
My cousins reports were always photocopied and a copy would go on my grandparents fridge. It always used to upset me.

@EllieNBeeb

Do you honestly think being proud of your kid and sharing joy in their success is bragging? Do you look at everything your child does in relation to someone else?

Yes it's bragging unless it's clearly something funny. Also it's rude to put your kids report on, they are kids, maybe later they will be cross you made a report about them so public.

Luckily I am old so not many of my peers do this anyway

I'm generally a FB oversjarer. I do plenty of things mnetters disagree with like having shared pictures of my children on birtjdays/Christmas etc and not really minding of other people do the same BUT I cannot understand the screenshot sharing of school reports at all. Especially when the parent seems to have not understand the meaning of the carefully chosen words...

I think it's particularly thoughtless this year as it hasn't been a level playing field in terms of homeschooling: parents time, resources, tech etc. Some kids will have fallen further behind than others and parents who were trying to juggle WFH, younger children, lack of technology, bad wife will already be blaming themselves for their children struggling to keep up without having their noses rubbed in it.

And I say that as someone who's child had a school place during lockdown and who got a good report.

Wifi*

I'm not looking at social media right now. My 15 year old hasn't been in school for 2 years, no glowing reports for years, no grinning end of year photos, probably no prom next year. I sound very uncharitable and people have every right to be proud buy I just dont want to see it

I also reckon it's some kind of breech of privacy to post so much info about your child online when they post the whole report

@EllieNBeeb - your response seems disproportionate. I wouldn’t bother posting about it on a forum but I think all this kind of over sharing is naff and in extremely poor taste. Not sure why you’ve got your knickers in such a twist- the OP’s view is not that radical.

You think me saying that people should be happy for their friends happy moments is having my knickers in a twist? Not everyone else judging their 'friends' innocuous actions? People really will try anything to justify their negativity.

I mean what is the point of putting anything on social media really. It’s all some form of bragging/attention seeking of some form isn’t it. People must get something from posting.

I wouldn’t personally put school reports on SM but I’m sure someone people wonder why I share pictures of where Ives walked and swam too.

One of my DD9 classmates moms put her glowing report on facebook, teacher saying what a delight she was in class etc etc. Turned out most of the kids had exactly the same wording on their child's reports! Backfired slightly for the mom posting on sm that the delightful wording was just copied and pasted.

@sparklystarshinebright

One of my DD9 classmates moms put her glowing report on facebook, teacher saying what a delight she was in class etc etc. Turned out most of the kids had exactly the same wording on their child's reports! Backfired slightly for the mom posting on sm that the delightful wording was just copied and pasted.

Yes! My sons has another kids name in it half way through. Oddly a kids name that was dropped in a previous letter. I’m guessing my son is similar to this other kid and the teacher did a bit of copy and pasting.