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Education

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Original poster

Who else thinks only just four years old is just too young for full time for your child?

84 replies

DaddyCool · 23/07/2007 08:51

His Birthday was the beginning of July. All he wants to do is play. I know that reception is fun through play but we've just returned from Canada and they don't start there children on full time until about 6 years old. They are part time for about two years from 4 to 6.

We hate the fact we have to throw him in full time school so early.

They won't delay him until January because they reckon he'll have problems making friends even though 27 out of the 30 children are already in the pre-school and have already made friends

We were under the impression that we could hold him back another year but apparently he would then skip reception altogether and go straight into first year.

Doesn't just four seem just too young to you?

Anyone kept there's back? Are there any alternative options?

OP posts:

MaloryTowers · 23/07/2007 08:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

totaleclipse · 23/07/2007 08:55

They adjust very easy, and it is a lot of fun, but another option is to put ds in a nursery part time, and enroll him in school next year

GhostofHedTwig · 23/07/2007 08:55

I really wouldn't advise holding him back .. going straight into year 1 is quite a shock as there is far more structure than reception.

It is a big shame you don't have split entry

Personally I'd be happy if they'd take my 3 year old full time rather than just for 2.5 hours .. but then she's an NSC not a PFB

filchthemildmanneredjanitor · 23/07/2007 08:55

hello! this is a subjecy tht is close to my heart. mt ds2 won't be 4 till the end of august and he starts school in september.

we wanted to defer for a year but were told, like you, that he would miss reception which we consider to be a crucial stage of his education.

we have our mp looking into it for us and everything.

we have been into school to meet his new teacher who is fab and very understanding and we have arranged for him to be part time. they have been very flexible and he will be doing 2 full days, two half days and then will be allowed to be off on the friday if he needs it, or go in for a half day or whatever.

he is veryvery very young and i am worried about him but these arrangements and the fab teacher have made me feel more confident.

totaleclipse · 23/07/2007 08:56

luckily my dts were born in December, so they wont start reception until they are nearly 5.

Sheherazadethegoat · 23/07/2007 08:56

move to scotland!

Magicmayhem · 23/07/2007 08:56

will they let him go for mornings only till January...
My DD is a July birthday, she started school when she was nearly 5 though.. she coped. She went to nursery every morning till she started school, does your son do pre-school or nursery? how does he cope with that...

Hulababy · 23/07/2007 08:57

In most cases yes, if you hold him back a year he will go straight into Y1, missing reception. You may be able to argue a case for him going into reception, and thus being the eldest in the class, but you need to be prepared to fight hard.

Leaglly they have to allow you to let your little one delay starting, as school is not compulsary until the term after he turns 5. However the school do not have to keep a place open for your child, and you would risk losing a place at your preferred school.

But many children, aged just 4yo, do cope well going to school early. Equally some 5yo find it too much.

Only you know what is best for your child.

Original poster

DaddyCool · 23/07/2007 09:01

He did part time play school in Canada for the last year and he coped well. Only thing is, they seem to take a much more relaxed approach and all he did was play and mess around. Hardly any education type things at all.

OP posts:

indignatio · 23/07/2007 09:03

my ds was just 4 when he started reception in Sept last year. For him, I would not have wanted him to start in Jan as important friendships and class routines are ingrained by then. His teacher was great, often advises parents not to bring the child in on a Friday as said child is looking tired. ds opted to go in each day but take a couple of afternoons off each week. This continued until the final term when he announced that it was more fun being at school than coming home.
I strongly believe that if he had only been ready for half days all year, that would have also been fine with the school.

Kids (England) do not have to legally be in school full time until the term after they turn 5.

DC - is your child's school prepared to be flexible? If yes, you can decide what is right for your child (which changes as the year progresses). If not, do you know why not ?

Original poster

DaddyCool · 23/07/2007 09:03

School won't do part time, won't start him in January.

Head Teacher is very nice and school is fine but she's hard! She insists he's "just fine" which I'm sure is true but we still get angry that we have to throw him in already.

I'm just having a moan more than anything.

OP posts:

filchthemildmanneredjanitor · 23/07/2007 09:04

dc-go in and talk to the school.
if they are worh their salt they should be able to come up with some alternative arrangements-or at least flexible arangements.

Magicmayhem · 23/07/2007 09:04

I think thats all they do at reception though.. its all learning through play.. Have you spoken to the teacher to get her views... looked round the school.. spoke to other parents...

filchthemildmanneredjanitor · 23/07/2007 09:04

right if she won't do part-time and won't cooperate then i would really look for a nother school. that is not good.

FlameDelacour · 23/07/2007 09:05

Its all wrong - I've seen it with Psychomum's youngest - he was not ready, and hasn't coped well all year. He is only just seeming ready now (was 5 last week).

My DD on the other hand was 4 in May and is more than ready.

Why can't they go back to the old system of staggered intakes??

Furball · 23/07/2007 09:06

I too have a summer (august) boy and it is a worry, but, I think you have to take each child individually. For my ds starting school in a septmber (he's now just about to start year 2) was right for him mentally but emotionally you can tell he is young. The school should, if your child is struggling with full days let them do some half days and legally if your child is tired you don't actually have to send them in. It does seem daunting like when ds was still 3 in the July I was trying to find school trousers as he was starting in the september! But, take it one day at a time, he'll make friends don't worry about that, they do at that age. He'll probably settle in fine and after a while you'll wonder what the worry was. (as happened in my case)

filchthemildmanneredjanitor · 23/07/2007 09:06

i know. it's ridiculous!

my ds will be still be 4 when he finishes reception! he won't be 5 till two weeks before he starts year 1!!!!

Hulababy · 23/07/2007 09:10

We do have staggered intakes in the state sector in Sheffield. But even this doesn't work for all. DD was more then ready to go to school, and would have been the only child in her academic year left at her nursery, had she gone into state sector. This would have been horrid for her. We chose to put DD into school in September and it was definitely best for her.

Maybe what we need is staggered intakes, but with the decision of which children start when should be agreed upon by school/nurseries/parent discussion, on an individual basis. That way we can do what is best for each child, not just based on age.

gess · 23/07/2007 09:10

School is never compulsary. 'education' is the term after 5 but not school.

DS1 started reception by going 2 days a week for 2 hours a day. It was to be honest a total PITA; he didn;t go full time until year 1, but it can be done (that school had a single point entry as well).

I wouldnt worry too much. DS2 has just finished reception and came back each week with photos and a typed class diary from the teacher (2 sides of A4) of examples of the things they've done. It's full of trying on costumes, dressing up games in the home corner (which changes each term or half term, it's been a shop, a beach hut and other stuff- the children choose) puppet shows, dancing, nature trips into the garden, 'science' (dropping things in water and seeing which sink and float, putting felt pens on blotting paper), meeting authors, watching visiting educational shows, making collages etc etc. And somewhere in all of that he's learned to read and add and subtract, and amazingly for him; draw and paint. But seriously I've been very impressed at how creative the year has been, and just how much play, and how much 'learning through play' there has been. I couldn't have thought of half of it.

katiebell100 · 23/07/2007 09:10

A subject close to my heart too. My boys were both born at the end of July, so will be among the youngest in their classes. Ds1 will start school in next January, but our borough has recently changed its policy and ds2 will start in September with all the other children and I am very unhappy about it. In 2 years time I will be on school holidays with ds2, he'll be starting school in five weeks and he still won't be four!! It's utter madness and like Filch I have written to my MP and the council, he will be too young to cope. He'll be 20% younger than those children born in September which is huge!!!!

However, reception isn't that different to pre-school as it's mostly play based and year 1 is now the year when they move to structured work, instead of reception being about getting them ready for the structure of year 1. 'Formal' learning does seem to be coming in later and that's a good thing, children need to have time to play. I wouldn't keep him back if the only option os for him to go straight into year 1, it will be too much of a shock.

Oblomov · 23/07/2007 09:11

I think 4 is too young. Parts of Europe when atthay are 5,6 or even 7, sound like they have it sussed. It is so wrong.
Atleast I started when I was 5, not, in the year in which you are 5.
I believe thats where we are going wrong today.

Original poster

DaddyCool · 23/07/2007 09:12

but MaloryTowers got it spot on for my boy. He can't wipe his bum, lunch is a big undertaking and dressing himself?? HA!

What do you do about this? Do they help him out if he is struggling?

OP posts:

indignatio · 23/07/2007 09:13

fmmj - my ds is 5 tomorrow - he broke up for the summer hols last thursday - so I do understand. For him - and I know every child is different, he has loved his reception year and with hindsight (such a wonderful thing) I would not have wanted him to miss it. The flexible approach means that you can work out what is right for your child at each stage of the year.

katiebell100 · 23/07/2007 09:16

DC, of course they'll help him if he's struggling!!! As a teacher, reception don't actually do PE for ages as they're all still getting changed Most schools have staff that sit with the reception children during lunch to help them eat. I'm not worried about ds's bum, as he will only go at home, whe he was a baby he wouldn't go all day at nusery, used to save it till we got home

portonovo · 23/07/2007 09:17

I agree with gess, our reception classes do masses of really fun stuff. They play in so many different ways, lots of lovely creative stuff and imaginative play. Lots of cooking, craft, outdoor play, welly walks etc.

My youngest son is a July birthday and really enjoyed reception. I have to say that our school does mornings-only until the start of December for those born about April-August, and this seems to work well. The school is also fairly flexible in that it has allowed those parents who are really worried about their younger ones to start them a few half-days a week - but in every single case this arrangement has been very short-term as the parents realised how much their children loved school, how easy the integration was and how much play they did!

In actual fact, some of the day nurseries around here do much more formal work than our reception classes do.

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