Putting my child in a private school

[DaisyRaine90]

Can’t be the only one who started their child in state school and had such a bad experience dealing with the head teacher that we’re putting her in private instead? I wish I’d never put her in state school at all 😔 Grew up on socialism, but damn these schools are so bad. I already moved her from state to private nursery last year and it’s happening all over again x

"This is not a state vs private issue"

That's exactly how the OP has framed it:

I wish I’d never put her in state school at all 😔 Grew up on socialism, but damn these schools are so bad

Dcs all went to lovely village state primary, however eldest dd had really bad dyslexia/dyspraxia/dyscalculia and had help at primary school and got fairly reasonable SAT results.
However SENCO at state secondary said she'd be lucky to get a few GCSEs....based on their initial assessment...she really struggled in yr 7 as comprehensive school was too big for her and class sizes were huge
We moved her to small private school in Yr 8 as felt she was being left behind and no one was interested in helping her....class sizes were small and the staff were lovely....she ended up with 10 GCSEs, 4A levels, now has 2:1 MA Hons, MSc teaching English in China and has been asked to do PhD in Linguistics when she returns
The younger 2 stayed at the local comp as they had fewer SEN problems ( although both have dyslexia) have also both done well and now at Uni.....so each child been treated as an individual....it's what's going to suit your dc

I hope you find the right school for your DD. Did you look at other state schools as they can be very different, or is it a case of that's the only state school available. You might be able to save some money.

The state schools are all fully subscribed. Going to be a push to find her a school at all but I would rather homeschool than send her back there (not that I have the time but 🙄) I do have high standards. I expect children to wash their hands and not assault each other (oh and actually learn something!) at school. I don’t think that should be unreasonable. It’s the bare minimum Id expect of a childminder or babysitter, so why not a school in loco parentis? Or maybe it’s me that’s loco. She is a very happy child and fits in well most places, but they are not pushing her at all in any way and every day she comes home asking to learn because “all we do at school is play.” I believe there is a place for that, but I don’t want to hold her back her whole life because her teachers were so busy dealing with other children’s tantrums they didn’t have time to teach her to read and write.

A relative of mine ended up in a senior teaching position in a private school. She wasn't a qualified teacher. But that didn't seem to bother anyone. I dread to think what kind of teaching she offered. But because she was "posh" and could seemingly charm the parents that seemed to be enough. This was primary and not so very long ago.

Ah! Your four year old is a genius and her needs are not being met through play! It is much clearer now.

Learning through play!
Scandalous

every day she comes home asking to learn because “all we do at school is play.”

I call bullshit.

Oh, your child is gifted. You should have said at the start.

I never said she was gifted at all. I said she comes home asking to learn. I would say that’s the norm if a child is not getting their education elsewhere? Children are curious x

I have no idea about her IQ but she’s always hit every mile stone and fairly well. I think she’s behind though, she’s in reception and can’t read 🙄 x

Of course play is incredibly important 🙄 I’m not a muppet we all need recreation

She’s in reception and can’t read? She’s only been there a few weeks. What are you actually expecting?

Same as the playing. Have you never heard of learning through play?

I must admit if I was the head I’d have put you in your place as well. It sounds like you don’t actually have a clue how education of young children works and went in there trying to call the shots.

we all need recreation

Learning through play is not "recreation". Did you not go to any of the sessions before she started in reception? You seem not to have a clue how education works.

Yes and children need more recreation than adults 🙄 recreation being play, and play being the fundamental way children communicate with and understand their worlds. However, that doesn’t mean they can’t also be educated and not punched in school. 🙄

For instance, I think children should grow gardens, swim, ride bikes, Ski, sledge, play sports, play make believe, read stories and write stories. I could read at 4 (so could my partner). So why is it just this phonics nonsense? She learns a sound a day at this rate she’ll never read 😭

And she really WANTS to. She’s a self lead learner, I wouldn’t have to contribute this is who she is. A striver, ambitious. I’m open to who she is and I do not want to fail her aspirations

recreation being play

Not true in the context of a reception class.

A striver, ambitious. I’m open to who she is and I do not want to fail her aspirations

She's 4, right?

I went to all the meetings. The HT was recurrently unavailable. I made the decision and it was on the grounds of the Deputy and some of the other teachers who were compelling. I was always concerned with the free flow for 60 kids system.

Children learn through play. If you little one comes home happy saying she's been playing that probably because the teaching was good and engaging.

What is it that you'd like? Little children sitting quietly at tables with straight backs, copying lines while a stern teacher walks around with their mean face on?

Why is phonics “nonsense”?

I am in my mid 40s and learned to read through phonics so it’s hardly some kind of new fangled innovation. Or do you think that schools are somehow using crap methods that don’t work to teach kids to read?

One sound a day sounds fine. I am sure my son learned one sound a week in the early days. By the time he was in his second year of primary school he was rattling through proper chapter books. I think your problem is that you know nothing about education yet think you do.

Yes she’s 4. 🙄 Do you not know your children that well?

I learn the word nto by suodnign ti otu

Don’t yuo?