Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Original poster

How exactly do you know that your DC should go to grammar school?

317 replies

plus3 · 05/10/2012 11:06

Sorry for the ridiculous question, but I am going slightly bonkers.

DS is in yr 4 and has unspecified learning difficulties - mainly with attention and processing instructions. He is bright & remembers incredibly well. Literacy & science are his favourite subjects, and thinks he struggles with Maths but is actually above average. He craves structure and routine

My problem is that I am aware of some children in his class already doing extra work out of school (such as explore & kumon etc) and I now feel like I am letting him down hugely.

Should we be jumping on the treadmill of extra work etc to give him an even playing field? I don't really believe in excesses coaching to pass the 11+

So how do we tell if Grammer could be the place for him? When I have spoken to school, they always imply that academically he will be fine (whatever that means)

Sorry if this long & rambling, it all seems so very competitive around here (Bucks) thanks.

OP posts:
jabed · 08/10/2012 09:06

But it's very silly to say of a small boy that he's a dead cert for anything that's years in the future

Where have I said he is a dead cert for anyhting? I have said he is highly intelligent. That will not change regardless of what he does or does not do with it. G factor IQ is precisely that. It does not change.

Yellowtip · 08/10/2012 09:22

You're right to question it seeker, since it's bullshit. Not a single school in the country in any sector gets 100% A. Some schools make it harder for themselves than others by taking all exams in one sitting and sticking to linear exams. Is that the way your school does it jabed*? (all exams in one sitting and linear).

Also, I'm not clear why you think I'm 'jealous'? The last thing I want snapping at my ankles is a ferociously bright 6 year old boy. It sounds completely exhausting.

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 08/10/2012 09:26

Jabed - 'That despite he would be in the top percentile of entrants.' I suppose you mean his IQ suggests he is in the 'top percentile'? But it does sound just a tad complacent!

Yellowtip · 08/10/2012 09:26

Which grammar made that claim? I don't think any grammar this summer has made any such claim. They won't keep it a secret if true, so no need to be coy.

seeker · 08/10/2012 09:31

Jabed, I'm sure you said somewhere on this thread about your child being in the top percentile of grammar school entrants? Or did I imagine that? If that's not saying that a 6 year old is a dead cert for something....

Andnthis accusation of jealousy is bonkers. Apart from anything else, ho have no idea of the academic capabilities of everyone else's children!

Yellowtip · 08/10/2012 09:33

My brother in law was apparently off the scale at the same age as your DS and has epically failed to carry that through, in spite of the benefit of an expensive education and the lack of any particular issues. His genes are ok too (uncle with a double First in Classics). Anyhow, he's perfectly happy having partied his way to a Third, but it's not what his parents predicted.

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 08/10/2012 09:36

Anyway, no disrespect to the boy, but let's not have another thread derailed into discussion of Jabed's son... his own attitudes have far more potential for a debate!

I think, on the contrary to Jabed's initial post, that if you think you don't have to ask, you need to think a bit more. It's natural, human and humble in the face of the complexities of parenthood and education, not to be too sure what's right and best all the time, and to assume either way for certain would seem unwise.

MordionAgenos · 08/10/2012 09:39

@seeker Per the Guardian's 'interactive map' for 2012 the top A/A percentage was Henrietta Barnet with 91%. And that's A/A not just A*. No grammar school got higher.

jabed · 08/10/2012 11:02

Jabed, I'm sure you said somewhere on this thread about your child being in the top percentile of grammar school entrants? Or did I imagine that? If that's not saying that a 6 year old is a dead cert for something....

My brother in law was apparently off the scale at the same age as your DS and has epically failed to carry that through, in spite of the benefit of an expensive education and the lack of any particular issues. His genes are ok too (uncle with a double First in Classics). Anyhow, he's perfectly happy having partied his way to a Third, but it's not what his parents predicted

QED vis my previous post then. High IQ is no dead cert of anything except a high IQ. The IQ will not change. What is achieved with it is different. It may be something spectacular, it may be nothing at all.

My DS has the IQ and I have nowhere that I expect anything from that.

jabed · 08/10/2012 11:03

Not all schools (especially independents) have published results this year.

jabed · 08/10/2012 11:05

I could be clearer in my answer to the OP but if I did, I would open myself up for another salvo, so I have to repeat as I did, if the child is not in the top percentile then she needs to consider carefully.

breadandbutterfly · 08/10/2012 12:04

Why? Why not apply and if the dc doesn't get in, then go for the equally attractive Pan B?

I don't see why people need to make a huge commitment just to making an application - apply, if it's right then your dc will get in and if it's not right then they'll go to another school and enjoy that instead.

The only reason poeople get het up about grammar school applications is because they imagine they need to intensively tutor for years, which is nonsense.

If in doubt, ask your dc where they would like to go - as they are the one who actually has to go there (and do any work for preparation for entrance exams) then it seems reasonable to ask them and let them make that choice.

And yes, a bright pupil can do just as well in the top sets of a comp, but may need a little more self-motivation to get there as the school may push less or expect less (but not nec, depends on the school). But it's hardly a crisis if your dc ends up at a comp!

breadandbutterfly · 08/10/2012 12:04

Plan B - Pan B sounds yummy...

breadandbutterfly · 08/10/2012 12:05

Oh, jabed - you do realise your posts about your ds came across as rather weird, don't you?

Remember - this is MN and we all have bright dcs on here - esp on grammar school threads...

breadandbutterfly · 08/10/2012 12:09

I would be v worried about any school that achieved all As - don't see how that could be possible unless lots of subjects were banned. you can't expect everyone to be a perfect all-rounder - all As at Art, say? Plenty of v bright kids who can't get their head round X or Y or just hate X or Y.

No-one needs all A*s so why should it be a priority?

Yellowtip · 08/10/2012 12:22

Jabed you say in terms that you 'know of one grammar who has claimed [a 100% A* hit rate] this year'. Which is it? Or have they made the claim confidentially only to you? I'm sure there's a public interest in knowing.

And does your school sit their GCSEs in one sitting at the end of Y11? Or does it take one or both of the soft options?

seeker · 08/10/2012 12:24

I have already asked jabed to name names. I got a cryptic one word response. I think he is making it up.

hatsybatsy · 08/10/2012 12:36

aha - another education thread where Jabed is taking pleasure in winding everyone up.

can he be for real?

Yellowtip · 08/10/2012 12:39

I know seeker. I'm just pressing him.He must be making it up since no grammar scored 100% A* at GCSE this year or in any previous year and nor did any other school in the country.

Even SPGS failed to hit the jackpot in any one individual full cohort subject. That's how wide of the mark jabed is.

TalkinPeace2 · 08/10/2012 12:45

Statistically the ONLY way any school could get straight A/A* results would be to triage all their pupils just before the exams and stop all but the top 10 from taking them.
It is patently ridiculous to expect straight As and A* from ANY cohort of pupils - even a highly selected and intensively tutored one
as every child has slightly rougher subjects and kids even have off days.

In my DCs school in 2011 they had 7 pupils get straight A and A* out of 300 - but its a comp. I'm quite happy with that as I know that the top sets are directly comparable with the local selective indie school.

DizzyHoneyBee · 08/10/2012 13:02

My oldest did the 11+ and got a place but didn't take it up (long complicated story), now they are in year 10 and they are in the top sets for everything and getting A* grades at GCSE papers.
Going to the grammar school is not the be all and end all, and if they are bright AND work hard, then I reckon it's better to be top set in a comprehensive than average at a grammar school.

LaQueen · 08/10/2012 13:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LaQueen · 08/10/2012 13:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

seeker · 08/10/2012 13:32

"bread my DD1 is actually perfectly happy to go to the GS, as she knows that most of her friends at school will he hoping to go there. She just assumes that she will go there IYSWIM?"

That's why you need a psychological plan B.

Yellowtip · 08/10/2012 13:33

Yes she would Queen, it's called 100%.