I send my child to private school because....?

[jabed]

Well, I don?t actually, I just work in one. But it seems to be a constant source of questioning on MN and given the current news articles (I have been reading the DM and Tory graph online) about how many of our left wing leaders hypocritically claim to be egalitarian and socialist whilst buying education for their children , or have had education paid for by their own parents. I just wondered, what is it we expect from education, and why is it some of us are willing to pay for whatever that is and how they see that as worthy of their money.

There you go. :)

Having watched the same programme I think largely it demonstrated exactly what the Jesuits said. Funny how we can see the same thing and interpret it differently isnt it? I am the same age as those people give or take a few months.

Also, nearer to home, I have seen lots of local DCs grow up from babies to adults ( old NCT groups, toddler group ones etc) and you don't get what you expect! We recently met one of them who used to be a great friend of DS and went abroad to live at 7 yrs and is now 23yrs and has just reconnected with many of them through FB and he commented on the surprises that he found 16 years on!

So you looked at the cheery little boy from Liverpool and predicted a life time of mental health problems? You looked a Suzy aged 14 and 21 yrs and predicted that she blossomed into a perfectly normal mother with a long marriage?

Equally near to home - with a few exceptions, nearly all my friends have turned out to be exactly what I expected. I have also made some contacts from my school days (not via facebook - horrible instrument in my opinion). Maybe he just didnt get them sussed properly in the first place?

No, I looked back at them at 7 and made the decisions then. The likely outcomes were there. The academic who went to the USA, all the boys from public school etc.

@exotic Suzy is one of three people in that show who completely belied expectations. The other ones are.....Jacqui? The one who ended up as a course admin at QMC. And the one who was in a children's home and then emigrated to Australia. Sadly you could completely see that Neil was fragile right from the very start.

And according to people on here the Yorkshire accent would have put a stop to anyone rising to a top job!
I have looked at what people at my old secondary modern are doing, jabed, and it is a huge mix. There is a vicar, quite a few teachers with a few Head teachers, company directors among others and a great many who live and work abroad.

@exotic he had to go to America to get work......but to be fair a lot of academics did that in the 80s, there was little choice after the freeze in appointments.

Your criticisms of jabeds way of bringing up his DS is offensive the eality is that none of us know anything about each other and you are making exceedingly unpleasant and judgemental remarks having read what is basically a few lines on MN. Id be the first to admit that his approach to his DS's education wouldnt be my approach but I accept that it is his DS and he like all of us is doing what he considers the right things for him. I am sure than when he makes any decision he carefully considers all options and also all possible outcomes. The more I read of many of the postings on here the more saddened I feel? Is this what supporting state ed does to you that are so convinced of your own rectitude that anyone who doesnt follow your path (unless they have what you consider a justifiable reason) is open to attack. You're intolerance of others is breath taking and some of you tell me that my DS wont leave his boarding school with sufficient life skill! If what you encourage your DCs to believe is reflected in your postings then your children will go into the world convinced that they are right in all but the most special circumstances and that any variation on a theme is open to derision you all may see these as life skills but in my opinions these attitudes are a positive handicap.

@happy I beg your pardon? I have not once commented in how Jabed raises his DS. Mainly because I don't interact with people who I don't believe are real.

jabed can I ask what you wanted to achieve when you initiated this thread?

Happygardening started the thread! He invited comments and he knew perfectly well from other threads that he was being contentious! I have no intention of letting him get away with some of his comments about all state education without fighting back. I don't agree with most of his ideas but I doubt whether he loses any sleep over it!
I also don't think that you read my posts. I think that you suit the education to your DC. I met a friend yesterday whose DC is at boarding school, the alternative was to change schools at 11yrs,12yrs and 13yrs - totally unfair on her.

Sorry - I missed out the essential he in the first sentence! Jabed started it- if you start things you can't control the way they go!

He has also been posting long enough to know not to start a thread like this if you can't take the replies!

I have not criticised the way jabed raises his children. However, he has not held back in his criticisms of the way the vast majority of the population raise theirs! The things he has said about state schools, state educated children and parents are completely outrageous!

Appygqrdening, I asked earlier for examples of allnthese awfult hinges you believe people have said about private schools, children and parents- you haven't come back with any. Apart from a few comments people have made bout boarding. Which isn't really relevant to the thread.

I've no problem with you arguing with him but I personally beive to be spiteful about the way he exucates his DS and make catty predictions about how his DS turns out is below the belt. If I said that by sending your DC's to state schools you were doing them a disservice because you are limiting their future prospects as adults you would all go justufiably mad and but you feel that you can launch a similar personal attack on someone else's DC. Parenting is hard enough without other parents critisising our individual decisions especially when they are only able to see a fraction of the whole picture.

Sorry the computer posted it before I had an opportunity to look over it with admittedly limited proof reading skills hope it makes sense.

I agree to a certain extent with happygardening - some of the comments on here are getting a little bit personal and hurtful.

Jabed - I seriously meant have you considered moving country, not county. Other countries do take different approaches to education, after all, and I don't think you would be unemployable overseas?...

It worked for my db...

Jabed knew exactly what he was doing when he started this thread. Whilst I often find myself incredulous at some of the "facts" he posts, he is certainly not so naive as to not know exactly how it would go.

Maybe youre right perhaps it's the general level of vitriol generated on this thread that I have found saddening. Most write in an articulate and passionate way do any of you not wonder if your writings/passions could not be channelled into more needy causes. We've just fought two unwinable wars which cost us as tax payers an unbelievable amount of money, should we have campaigned more to stop this? Millions in Africa have died in the last 20 years due to war poverty and it's associated famine and exploitation should we not be channelling our energies into this rather than critisising how we as individuals educate out children. Many elderly in the UK are treated in care homes worse than prisoners and to make matters worse are paying for the priveledge if we don't do something about this soon it will be you in this situation. Out NHS is being eroded staff moral is rock bottom one day you will need it and I can tell you because I work in it in many cases care is mediocre to say the least is this what you want? So perhaps all you articulate and passionate MNetters instead of attacking each other for a choices we should be channelling our obvious intelligence into more desperate and worthy causes!
Jabed one final point a more interesting question would by why do some send their DCs to independent schools when they have excellent state schools in their doorsteps?

happy

No, I do not think the NHS would be better if I stopped posting on MN. You need a bit of perspective.

BTW, I teach in a state school, so my passion and energy are usually channeled into the greater good, it's just that I'm on holiday right now.

I didn't say stop posting but are we channelling our undoubted intelligence and passions into the wrong things; personal attacks on the way people chose to educate their children?

In 7Up which is well worth watching on youtube if you haven't seen it, the children turned out as you would expect - the working class stayed working class. The boarding school boys became a QC and a solicitor etc etc.