How much do you sacrifice to send Dc to private school?

[VeryTiredMummyOf2]

I have 2 Dc, just want to know what people give up? And is it worth it?

At my DS's school according to a recent publication about 10% are on bursaries including 100% bursary. A boy does not have to win a scholarship or come top in the entrance exams to get one. I accept this is fairly unusual but there are others doing similar things and are completely committed to the idea of broadening their intake. They should be ap

Trying to say they should be applauded for their committment to this.

Isn't there some surprising statistic about Eton having a large number of boys on varying amounts of reduced fees?

Don't know Etons figures but yes they too are trying to broaden their intake. Although the last time I read their website they stated they were only guaranteeing bursaries of more than 50% to those who won scholarships. I suspect this is because they are very over subscribed at the best of times and more people got to know that they were offering bursaries as a few years ago they went round lots of prep schools etc telling parents and also the current financial situation probably means more people applying for a bursary than a few years ago.
Anyway this was not what the OP asked there's lots of info on bursaries MN.

the ones i've looked at only offer bursaries to those who've won a scholarship - so you have to be in the top of the exam pass levels to get that scholarship (50% of fees) and then if you are low income you may also be able to apply for a means tested bursary towards the other 50%. i haven't seen any that offer bursaries for non scholarship winning students so basically they're offering help to very able pupils who would not otherwise be able to access private education.

Go and look at the school, introduce yourself, look interested and then if it's a school you'd like your child to attend ask for a bursary application.
They don't advertise the bursaries otherwise every tome dick and harry would want one. But they are available.

I agree swallowedAfly that sadly there are not many schools who will offer large bursaries to none scholars but there are some. I dont now what age/sex/your location/whether you would consider boarding/how academic you DC is but both the highly selective Winchester College (boarding only) and St Paul's boys offer generous bursaries to non scholars the details are on their websites. Christ Hospital again mainly boarding and selective and apparently very strong musically also has a long history of offering generous bursaries to its pupils. I'm sure there are others why don't you try a new thread?

There are definately ones who do ,if you want to PM me I'll see if I can point it out .Bursaries are very often dealt with separately from scholarships ,at out school
Bursaries are competitive so you do have to do well in the exam but tbey wi also look at the broader case ,also remember scholarships are not means tested,so tbey wouldn't just award bursaries to scholars.Often there will be a box on the application form for means tested bursary applications

at this point in time (second week of school holidays) boarding school sounds wonderful i expect i'll feel differently next week though. although actually it has surprised me when i've looked at schools how drawn i am to the idea of him boarding for a good part of his teens.

my son is only 5 so we're talking a long way off and therefore what i can do in the interim to improve chances.

i am a single parent and ds has never met his father. he currently has grandparents around who feature a lot in his life so it is countered somewhat by my father but he won't be around forever. i would love in an ideal world for ds to go to a boys school with lots of male teachers and role models and a really good ethos and opportunities to be involved in lots of different activities and to mix with international students for secondary school.

anyway - pie in the sky and massive thread derail - sorry OP

The thing is more people are aware of the bursaries and "every tome dick and harry" does want one! But every school I've ever looked at has some details about bursaries on its website in fact some schools do publish on their websites very detailed info about their bursaries. I've got into my head that Sherbourne boys does/did but I might be wrong. But you do have to be careful many make grandiose claims but fail to live up to their promises. If your serious about a school visit it and then as mrswoodentop suggests speak to the head and the bursar and be honest from day 1 hopefully they will be honest in return and tell you whether on not they can help. If you looking at a boarding school that is some distance from your home ring the bursar before you visit again be completely honest and realistic about how much financial help you would need. Generally schools don't want to waste their time/your time/or raise your DCs hope by showing people around who ultimately cant afford it for what ever reason.

"Bursaries are competitive so you do have to do well in the exam"
Win Coll and St Pauls select in yr 6 for yr 9 entry bursaries are offered prior to sitting their entrance exams in yr 8 obviously you have to meet the required standard but you don't have to do extra well in their exams!
A few other points:

1. Bursaries at prep level are harder to find and swallowedAfly I have no idea where you live but Colet Court prep for st. Pauls is one of the few preps to really offer bursaries and if your DS is musical there might be other preps that would consider you for a bursary.
2. In general boarding preps are more generous.
3. I also believe that Win Coll and St Pauls have a different entry criteria/exam for those from state schools as will others. St Pauls in particular requires early registration.
4. If you look at Eton's website they imply that they are hoping to offer larger bursaries in the future and I suspect that if the charities commission reinvestigates this issue then more maybe forced encouraged to be more generous. So time is on your side.
5. Most importantly if you don't try you defiitely wont get one!

Its hard to imagine letting you DC board when they're only 5. When mine were that age I thought parents who boarded their children were monsters. Both mine started full boarding in yr 3 and one still boards now we are not monsters and neither of my DC's are dysfunctional sociopaths!

I've been told that last year Eton had 1000 applicants for 100 places. Not sure if that was just for scholarship exams or general though. I was also told of a boy who was grade 8 in one instrument and grade 7 in another who only got an Exhibition not a full music scholarship. That's completely put me off even though it is the closest boarding school to us.

Ds is going to a prep that has boarding but where boarding is not compulsory. I looked at one that had compulsory boarding for years 7 and 8.

As for preps being full of male teachers, ime you still have to wait until senior school to see a fair number of male teachers. In ds's current boys only school there are five in junior prep (2 of which are sports teachers) and non in pre-prep.

"last year Eton had 1000 applicants for 100 places."
I am not an Eton expert there are plenty on MN who are (its not for me although plenty love it) I understand the are about 200+ places at yr 8 and about 4 maybe 5 boys for every 1 place. This I suspect would be on a par with most selective London day schools or maybe even slightly less competitive.
My DS's were at a fairly traditional boarding prep and males teachers were in the majority. At his senior senior boarding school males teachers are in the overwhelming majority.

So that must have been scholarship applicants then. I was rather gobsmacked by that tbh. The actual figure was 105 places but pretty meaningless when I can't remember the exact context, although it was during a discussion about likelihood of senior school scholarships for ds (head told me to dismiss any thoughts of Eton as ds won't have the time to prepare to that level).

I believe there are about 100 (or may be 105) applicants for 20 maybe 24 (cant quite remember what my friend once told me) scholarship places and the competition is unbelievably fierce that I am sure about!

Often the bright children get offers from several schools though so any figures regarding applications at schools (although perhapsnot Eton where it is likely to be the first choice of most applicants) look worse than they are.

This below from my daughter's old school North London C (day school fees about £12k a year seniors) is pretty consistent with what is mentioned above for academic boys' schools too.

"Bursaries & Scholarships

Central to the ethos at North London Collegiate School is the provision of bursary places to allow bright girls to benefit from the world class education on offer, irrespective of their social or financial circumstances.

The North London Collegiate School was founded in 1850 by Frances Mary Buss, a pioneer of women's education at a time when society held the view that a woman's place was firmly in the home; very few schools then took the education of women seriously.

Miss Buss founded the school with the express purpose of providing an unashamedly academic education for women, which would fully equip them for careers in the professions. The fruits of her labours soon became apparent. NLCS produced many of the first women graduates across a range of professions: dentistry, medicine, the civil service, science, academia and the arts.

Since its foundation North London Collegiate School has been committed to providing an accessible, affordable education for girls of ability. As early as 1910 local and national governments grants enabled the school to take non-feepayers, a mix which strengthened and enhanced the academic standards of the school. The Direct Grant and, latterly, the Assisted Places schemes have enabled the school to continue this policy.

Despite the withdrawal of the Direct Grant scheme in 1976 and the Assisted Places scheme in 1998, North London Collegiate remains committed to providing opportunity based on ability, regardless of financial means. A successful appeal launched in 2000 has now improved the funds we have for bursaries.

The difference between a Bursary and a Scholarship

Academic scholarship awards are based solely on the entrance examination results at 11+ and 16+, with awards made on academic merit irrespective of financial means.  There are no special scholarship examinations nor do parents apply for a scholarship.  The value of scholarships is up to 50% of fees and is valid until the end of a girl's education at NLCS.

A number of music scholarships are awarded at 11+ on the basis of merit.  Girls must pass the entrance examination and a music audition conducted by the music department to qualify.  In addition, music scholars may be eligible for a bursary.  Parents who wish their daughter to be considered for a music scholarship must fill in an application form.  For further information and to download an application form, please read the Music Scholarship section below.

Bursaries are related to the income and assets of the family.  They are means tested and reviewed annually.  Bursaries may also take into account academic merit.  It is not unusual for a girl to be a recipient of both a scholarship and a bursary.  The value of bursaries ranges from 10% of school fees to 100%.  Pupils holding bursaries may also be given help with expenses such as school field trips.

How Bursaries and Scholarships are awarded

 Scholarships and bursaries are given to girls aged 11 prior to entry into year 7 or to new entrants joining the sixth form.
 In exceptional circumstances, bursaries may be available to help girls in Year 10 onwards, whose parents are experiencing financial hardship and cannot meet the cost of full school fees.  These bursaries are means tested and are applicable until family circumstances improve or the girl finishes her current examination course.
Bursaries are subject to an annual review and may be amended according to changes in the family's circumstances.  Bursaries are a percentage of school fees and revalued annually in line with rises in school fees.
Scholarships are not means tested and no special application is required.  Parents need not supply any financial details, unless they are applying for a bursary.  Since scholarships are awarded as a percentage of school fees, the sum awarded rises with any fee increase.
Girls may hold a scholarship combined with a bursary to the maximum value of 100% of school fees.

How do parents apply?

Enquiries about scholarships should be made to the Admissions Officer. All queries about bursaries should be directed to the school bursar.

NB - Applications for bursaries can only be made if your daughter is invited back for an interview following the examination.

Following success in the 11+ examination parents will receive a letter inviting them and their daughter to interview. Parents seeking a bursary must then apply before the interview date and complete a statement of income and fixed expenditure. The Bursar or Assistant Bursar then interviews parents to discuss their application and financial circumstances.

A committee of governors considers each case individually and in confidence. When the assessment process is complete, the Headmistress will write to parents offering a place and at the same time indicate whether an academic or music scholarship is to be awarded, or a bursary made available. Academic awards are made at the discretion of the Headmistress.

Why do girls schools start at 11 and boys schools at 13?

My DCs private school charge just under £6k at infants and it rises gradually to about £7500 at secondary. I live on the south coast.

I think it is relatively reasonable fee-wise but also a high achieving school. We have a joint income of about £63-£67k (depending on additional work). I work part time as it means not using wrap around care as much so I get time with the DCs. We also have some inheritence we are using to help us along.

If we didn't have the inheritence we would have been able to just about afford it (not sure from 4 but probably from 7 years) but we would have been limited to camping holidays and NO extras for the kids or us at all, I don't think we would have been comfortable.

I wouldn't have sacrificed all the extras until the boys secondary education (which I would definitely have done as most of our Junior and Senior schools are satisfactory or inadequate) as I think it is equally important to have a rounded education in life as well as just at school so feel after school clubs and hobbies are also worth investing in.

It took losing a parent at a young age to give us the additional money (we would of course have preferred not to be in that sitation) but we didn't hesitate at all to put it into paying off the mortgage and putting it towards school fees!!

My DD1 is about to start at pre-prep school crap state long story but I went back to work to pay for this. our DD2 will start at foundation 2 aged 3 at the same pre-prep. It works out to be about £15K for the next year for both then £20-25K until they move to secondary school then about £30K+ from then on. I feel it is worth me going back to work to do this, its not a "sacrifice" but hopefully giving them the best start we can give them.

I agree with Xenia that most people dont think about the choices they make at 14/18 have a huge impact on what happens with the rest of their life. I have been fortunate private school good degree but travelled and worked doing crap jobs for years afterwards, Luckily I have always done courses and postgrad stuff so could easily walk into a £50K+ job at the start of my career, but this was done to pay for school. If fees go up I'll get a better paid job.