HELP - I am being accused of a scam??!

[BassMama]

I recently sold an item on ebay and the buyer sent the money, and I posted the item.

Now, I did post 3 days late but I was on tour and didnt get the email with his address til I got back. I apologised to him, and explained that I was away. He seemed okay with it.

I have had about 15 emails from the buyer, claiming that he never recieved the item.
I have douvle checked the address with him. It was the right one. He has now opened a dispute on paypal and ebay about me and i dont know what to do. he is asking for POD number (?) and delivery number (again, ??)It was just a normal 'post in a jiffy bag' thing, so i didnt get anything like that?

I dont know what to do, and am worried as i have spent the money (it was nearly £200)

It's only worth sending recorded for anything of value if it goes missing. I suspect that recorded delivery items are less likely to be stolen by an employee of Royal Mail or The Post Office.

However, Recorded Delivery is only compensated for £32 (for first class, less for second) and this doesn't include jewellery.

Send it Special Delivery!

Bassmama . This is a horrible situation to be in.
Unfortunately you have no evidence to prove that you ever sent the item, so the weight of evidence is in the buyer's favour.
I think you should refund him in full, and get the paypal dispute closed.
You obviously sent the item, and it may have got lost or stolen, or he may have received it and be pretending he hasn't. But unfortunately that is irrelevant as you have no proof of ever sending it.
I know it is annoying, but really, you have no choice as you didn't get a POD or insurance for a very expensive item.
This issue will only escalate and the seller is likely to get even more unpleasant - in fact, if he is genuine, he has every right to be extremely angry, doesn't he?
Paypal have no real option but to decide in his favour in this instance.
But really, if he gets angrier then he is quite within his rights to go to the police if he suspects fraud, and things really will get serious then.
I think you may have to see this as a very expensive lesson in protecting yourself as an internet seller.
I'm sorry you are caught up in this horrible situation.

Have not read all posts but I really feel bad for you Bassmama. However my DH is on the other side of a dispute on ebay at mo. He ordered something at £150, it didn't arrive. He chased it, seller had proof of postage. Package still has not arrived. Seller has been a bit rude, but he has proof he posted it. So far, DH is £150 out of pocket, with nothing to show for it. DH is 100% genuine and not trying to con anyone, and I think he has sent a few rather abrupt emails to seller getting him to chase things with post office. If seller did not have proof of postage DH would have hit the roof by now and would not believe it had been sent.

Trouble is, things do go missing every day.

Sorry, this does not help you at all but this guy might just be peed off that his goods have not arrived and may equally well believe you are conning him. How can he know any different?

We know you are genuine because you are a valued Mumsnetter!

Mumsypoops - its a Marshall Tube amp, for the stacking system we already have. We play massive venues and I also use the same system when DJing so it needs to be top of the range. It was £1699, and we spent the rest on cables and things that we needed.. As it appens, The Stones actually do use Marshall amps as well, as do lots of decent bands. Lucky them getting them for free eh. But, if you want quality, you have to pay for it.

Maybe I should have been more specific, but I really didn't think it was relevant!

For the record, we are signed. But we still have to buy our own gear. Buying good quality gear doesn't mean we are being ripped off!

BigEggLittleEgg -

So sorry to ear about your DH problem, but it does make me realise the other side.

I will pay him back I think, just to get the situation over with.

I've certianly learnt a valuable lesson about bloody postage!

It's a nightmare for you, BM, and I've learnt a lesson from it too becuse I sell a lot of things on ebay (not expensive so far) and it's never entered my head ot get proof of posting.

How long since you posted it by the way? Is there any slim hope it'll still turn up?

Sorry if I repeat what any other posts have said, haven't read them all, but even if you had send the item Recorded delivery, the maximum compensation from Royal Mail for a parcel going missing is £32, so this would not cover the £200 value. Special delivery or enhanced compensation for R Mail Standard parcels offer compensation up to £2500 and £500 respectively but both cost MUCH more to send this way.

So it would not really have helped much, other than to prove you sent it.

I have been a buyer who lost out - bought a nice moses basket on ebay, paid by paypal, the seller never sent it. But she had provided false details so I was £50 out of pocket and paypal never recovered any funds from her, so it does happen both ways.

But as I say the compensation would not have covered your buyer. Am a bit surprised neither he nor you considered this.

For future sales it is worth offering extra postage options such as recorded/special delivery if you are selling anything of value. That way if the buyer does not take this option you are in the clear.

Sorry can't help more in this particular case. Might be worth posting on the ebay bulletin boards for advice?

Even if you offer special delivery and the buyer doesn't take it, you are still not protected. You are still responsible as sender.

You have to use the protected options, to protect yourself. If sending something valuable, you should not offer the buyer the option of no special delivery.

BassMama. Still feeling for you. Didn't want you to feel bad when I posted, just that this guy COULD be genuine and just be getting arsey with you as he thinks you are the con artist.

Poor you. Hope you manage to raise the money. Maybe your band will make the big time and you will earn millions now you have your new amp...

"Mumsypoops - its a Marshall Tube amp, for the stacking system we already have. We play massive venues and I also use the same system when DJing so it needs to be top of the range. It was £1699, and we spent the rest on cables and things that we needed.. As it appens, The Stones actually do use Marshall amps as well, as do lots of decent bands. Lucky them getting them for free eh. But, if you want quality, you have to pay for it.

Maybe I should have been more specific, but I really didn't think it was relevant!

For the record, we are signed. But we still have to buy our own gear. Buying good quality gear doesn't mean we are being ripped off!"

I still think you've been ripped off - even if you're playing "massive venues" you dont need to spend that kind of money on amps, the in house PA will take care of that. And you are not seriously pretending that you play house music through a marshall stack - again you'd have a proper PA for that, not a guitar amp ?

What sort of contract have you signed if theres no stipulation for funds for equipment ? its all tax deductable remember !

It sounds to me like you're being taken advantage off left right and center - if the band splits tomorrow who gets the gear ? Did you use a specialist music lawyer when you signed your contract ?

Mumsypoops -

We play at a lot of outdoor events (mainly festivals). We provide the entire PA system, often for other bands as well. When we do indoor gigs, there usually is an in-house sysyem, which we can either use or use our own. Having top gear gets us more bookings!

When I am DJing, I use some pieces from the Marshall stack (including the amp!) i dont understand why you sould think this is strange? Lots of DJ's use guitar amps. In fact, we also hire out our PA system (as part of our business) and hire to Bands and DJs alike. In small venues, this kind of system IS far too big and the sound would be awful, but in 1000+ capacity venues, the sound is excellent.

We are signed to a recording contract, but the terms are album specific, and we run the live side ourselves. We have been doing this for years, we're not inexperienced, and we're not being 'ripped off'!
We do it this way as we have our own studio and so dont really need most of the 'benefits' that some from being managed. We really only use the record company for marketing and distribution.. and their percentage is much smaller as a result. We do get some sponsored kit from them but dont really use most of it - like i say we have been doing this for years (3 of the guys have been pro musicians for over 20 years, one for 12 years, and me for nearly 10) and have built up really decent gear, and a reputation for having such a good system!

If the band split tomorrow (lets hope not!) then the kit would all still belong to our company, of which we all (plus one other guy) have an equal share in.

Thank you for your comcerns, but I can assure you we are all pretty smart and dont buy things, or enter into ontracts, lightly!

oops posted that twice!!

BigEggLittleEgg - thanks for your comments.. I think i will just pay him back, incase he is genuine. I'd feel awful thinking I had done a decent man out of money, when really I should have got proof of posting. My fault.

Did a gig on tuesday night, so have enough left over (after paying my rent!) to pay him, so i will.

I hope it doesnt make me look guilty by paying him back though?

Message withdrawn

mumsypoops, it sounds like you're trying to 'prove' that Bassmama is some kind of a fraud! Your comments are so irrelevant to this thread.

BM have you made the refund yet?

I've had an odd thing on ebay myself, I sold an old super 8mm film projector and the buyer has 0 feedback and hasn't made the slightest attempt to pay or contact me! So I've opened a dispute today. I was thinking of you BM while doing it.

Thanks imaginary friend!

I just refunded him. Am now very and cos I have lost out..

but feel better as now noone can accuse me of conning anyone!!

Thanks everyone, for all your comments and help.

BM I think you've done the right thing. You can still give him negative feedback if you're suspicious he's not genuine plus to point out the abusive emails.

But I really feel for you. It's just the kind of stick I'd get myself in! I've done such daft things sometimes in a kind of blase fit of 'oh it'll all be ok!'

Hi imaginaryfriend - I'm sorry if you think its irrelevant, but the more I hear from Bassmama the less I believe

She's got this fantastically successful band/DJ scene/Club/PA hiring firm and to top it off her own studio - wow thats great !

Yet she needs to put her hand in her pocket to the tune of 200 notes when someone needs some equipment ? And thats for the full price of the equipment ? So wheres the profits from the last gig ? It doesnt add

"Lots of DJ's use guitar amps." complete and utter rubbish - I've never heard of any DJ who did such a thing and I've never met a guitarist who would let their amp be used like that ! Basically a guitar amp (especially a top of the range marshall stack) is made specifically for the range of sounds a guitar makes - to put a highly pre-powered sound with a wider range through one is potentially fatal

"Having top gear gets us more bookings!" - yes if you're a wedding band, not really if you're a happening rock band

The more I think about it, the less sense it make, the whole thing just doesnt ring true, she's been a pro musician for nearly 10 years ? how old is she ?

If they were as happening as she makes them out to be then I would be aware of them (I do some scouting for a major record company) If they had a succesful PA hire business I'd be aware of them from my time in bands myself

What she says about the recording contract doesnt add up either. If they did have anything released I would definately be aware of them although with an old lineup like that I would've discounted them straight away - not because I'm ageist, but sadly the public generally is and the music biz definately is

I just get the feeling she's a fantasist, when the little things dont add up, you start to doubt everything she says

Oh my GOD!!

Mumsypoops - What have I done to piss you off so much?!!

I never said we were fantastically successful band!!! We are a basic touring band, we play festivals and gigd all over the country, but at NO time have i ever claimed to be 'fantastically sucessful'!!
And I am a club DJ, NOT a famous DJ!! I play in some really big club nights, as do hundreds of other DJ's!!

I dont understand your coment about profits from gigs - we get paid when we do gigs - the money goes 6 ways, one fifth to each band member and one fifth into the company account. It is normally between £50 and £200 each.. not huge amounts and tends to be nearer the £50 end of the scale!

Just because you have never heard of a DJ using a guitar amp doesn't mean it doesn't happen! If it helps you understand - I also play percussion bass as well as DJ, usually in the same nights while someone else takes the decks (one of the other guys in the band also DJ's, often we do it together, and I have a lot of DJ friends, we do the PA system for them and do the percussion) so we have the guitar amp set up for that. It is perfectly feasible to run the whole sound through the same system!

OF COURSE having top gear gets us more bookings, and we do play weddings, often in fact. I have never said we were a 'happening rock band'!!! I really don't know where you are getting this from!

''If they were as happening as she makes them out to be then I would be aware of them (I do some scouting for a major record company) If they had a succesful PA hire business I'd be aware of them from my time in bands myself''
WTF??!!!!!
I'm sorry but are you claiming to have heard of every band in the world?!! Oh My God!

We have released 2 demos and are currently working on an album. This is not going to be released in general shops, like HMV!! We'll mainly sell it when we are doing gigs and have a few local independant record shops that will also be stocking it.
I can send you a copy, if you like..

To suggest that you would have heard of us because of the 'old lineup' is RIDICULOUS!! They are in their 30's and 40's FFS!!! Hardly OLD!! and not that it is relevant, but they dont look it!! and you are being ageist actually.

I don't understand why you are being so rude! very strange..

I think the whole point of mummypoo's rant is that now we all know that she works in the music business.....

Bassmama ignore her and her strange bee in her bonnet.

don't worry bassmama

mummsypoops is making at least one person lol

sorry yoou lost out never mind tho good fortune will come to you i'm sure

Message withdrawn

she's a frustrated/failed artist, naturally!! (mummypops that is)

BM, you know what? Ignore, ignore, ignore.

It's not relevant to your thread what you spent your money on.

... Unless mumsypoops is the guy from ebay with a pseudonym trying to make you think you're insane ...

Thanks ladies - I shall ignore!

Was a bit annoyed and then rang one of the guys in the band, told him - he thought it was bloody hilarious!! Cheered up now!

Man i only wanted a bit of Ebay advice and I get that!!!

Oh dear.. now TWO people in the world think I am some kind of con artist! WTF!!

BM, it wasn't you who said you'd buy my super 8mm projector and then disappeared was it?!?